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Saturday, February 16, 2008

The Circle of Life

this daily blog is from
tinkatia our
dear night owl

i have to say it brought
tears to my eyes, and yet
i am so glad she shared

The Circle of Life

by Tinkatia

Today once more I was summoned to my mom’s Care Home. She was sick and crying for me. As I was driving down to see her I started to remember all the things she had done for me when I was a child. She looked after me so protectively, brought me chicken noodle soup and ginger ale when I was sick, made sure I always had an extra sweater and held me close when I cried over a broken heart. She read me stories over and over again. Now I was taking her ginger ale. I am always worried that she is warm enough and I hold her close when she cries over her lost daughter. I listen to her stories over and over again.

I started to wonder “At what point does the mother become the child?” Does it happen the first time you tell her she should have a nap after lunch and she argues “I don’t need one.” Or is it when you tell her to try and take a few bites of dinner. “You know you will get sick if you don’t eat”. Maybe it’s when she tells you she doesn’t need to go to the bathroom and you tell her “Just try, we won’t be back in your room for an hour”. I wonder these things as I am fixing her hair with ribbons, tucking her into bed, telling her I love her and tip toeing out of her room.

My children are at the prime of their lives. They have such a busy time. There are so many activities involving their children, family, friends, school and work. There aren’t enough hours in the day for them. They have the world at their feet and they are loving it. Old age is so far away from them, they don’t give it a minute’s thought.

Two weeks ago before my children went to Hawaii, we went out to dinner. Before we left the house my daughter said to me in a very authoritative voice, “Mom, you had better bring an extra sweater. I don’t want you to get chilled at the restaurant”. I got a sharp twinge in my heart. I thought, “Oh God, not yet, it’s too soon.”

315 comments:

  1. First!? Dies that mean I have to make breakfast?

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  2. Breakfast is served!

    fresh fruit
    juices
    pancakes (blueberry, buttermilk, and chocolate chip)
    maple syrup or molasses
    eggs any style
    cereal, hot or cold
    bacon
    sausage
    hashbrowns
    homemade bread (white, whole wheat or brown) still warm
    butter
    jams and jellies

    Enjoy and have a great day!

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  3. Tink..your words, how true, how well written and timely. My folks are in their late 70's. Sometimes they need a lot of help, sometimes none, If its okay, I'd like to send your writing to my mom..it would be very touching for us both. Gotta go have a good boo hoo now..thank you thank you.

    Shirey..HHOOOT first, AND you had time to make an awesome breakfast!! How DO you DO it? Thanks and you have a great day too.

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  4. Oops I forgot
    muffins (low fat ones too)
    danish
    and donuts

    See ya!

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  5. Wow! Tink..What a great post...It gave me goosebumps

    Shirley..Thanks for breakfast

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  6. Good morning!

    Congrats to our dear Shirley for being first! And for the delish breakfast.

    Hi to Carol, Want2sleep, Nowmercy and Scirish!

    Tinka, your story is so touching. I find myself now doing things for my mom and dad, that they used to do for me.

    Just the other day, they were over to visit. I told them to drive safe, and call me when they got home so I know they made it ok.

    Last year when my grandma was dying, I saw my dad become the parent to her. He'd stay with her at night, make sure she stayed warm, make sure she ate, etc.

    Thank you so much for sharing!

    Have a great day everyone!

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  7. Happy Saturday..

    Good Morning, Shirley (congrats on first and thanks for breakfast), Want2, Scirish, EBJ, and Nowmercy.

    Tinka - thank you for blog today!!

    I completely know how you feel.

    My father suffered from MS and spent the last 10 years of his life bedridden - I was there to help my mother take care of him before we made the decision to put him into a nursing him. He was an extremely intelligent man, and for him to have his mind and not be able to function was not a good thing - he died an angry and bitter man.

    My mother is having major health issues. I have said many times that life has come full circle and that it is my turn to take care of her. She did so much for us kids! Sometimes, (most of the time) she isn't very nice to me and that hurts. Sometimes, you wonder WHY you are doing the things you do, when they seem to go unappreciated. Then, you will hear her tell someone else that she doesn't know what she would do without you. You wish she could tell you that, but, that just isn't my mother... Sometimes I don't like her very much! I feel VERY guilty for feeling that way. Other times, I think, what in the hell am I going to do without her. and, seriously, I really don't know what I am going to do without her.

    (it really has taken me awhile to write this - cuz, I have thought about NOT posting it - but I'm going to hit "publish")

    I hope everyone has an excellent day!! I'm off to my meetings...

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  8. from yesterday!!

    Tina - you win the prize at pronouncing my town!!! :-)

    Joey - i will be at the golf tournament!! LOL

    Heck, i think the whole world knows that I will be at the golf tournament!!! ;-)

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  9. and in honor of Joey - i will post three times in a row.

    Junior's car has been impounded for you Daytona fans!!!

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  10. OH - one more -
    I was TEN!!!!!!!!!!!
    since I won't be around to steamroll you guys later!!!

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  11. Thank you for the wonderful breakfast Shirley. I am famished and I knew that I could turn to my wonderful owlette friends to feed and nourish me back to 100%. I worked all day and half the night with the Regulators policeman's biker asocc. for tomorrow's benefit.

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  12. Good morning, shirley, thanks for breakfast and congrats on #1

    Good morning MEK, scirish, want2, ebj and nowmercy!

    Tink, that was some posting. I often say that I don't know if it is harder to be the child or the parent.

    My Mom tells me all the time that she doesn't know what she would do without me. She is independant and in pretty good health. But she IS getting older and will be 77 next month, and is slowing down. And I often find tremendous guilt on my part when I hear those words from her, after I have been crabby or impatient. I WANT to be that unselfish, thoughtful daughter that I can't always be.

    The joke with my youngest is that he always tells me to be nice to him, he'll put me in a better home that way. I laugh but now I wonder if someday it will true and he will have to make that choice. Like Tink, my childrens lives are full and busy. I'm only 48 and hopefully I will be around a long time, but as you get older you start to wonder....

    Good lord, I just wrote a novel!
    Happy Saturday everyone.

    Oh, BITCH - what you do when you are crabby and unhappy and complain
    BITCH- what you are when you are crabby and unhappy and complain

    :)

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  13. MEK..at my Dad's mother's funeral, he looked around the room and said something like "Let's get this said first, so we can all relax, Mom could be a very difficult person to be around and to help, she was basically a real pain most of the time before she died. Having said that, I know we all loved her and came closer to each other because of her anger. I won't be hurt if you tell the truth about your experiences" The whole place sighed. People then were able to tell funny, touching, even difficult stories. I think that healed some of her damage and I'm sure she would have wanted it that way, since she was stuck deep in bitterness and self focus. She did her best too..and it really left her kids in pain, they needed (and rightly so) more. The weird thing is, my Dad has now become very much like his mom...I may end up repeating his eulogy. I don't know why there is a rule about being bad if you have dislike for a parent. I hear you really disliking the experience, feeling unnourished by your encounters with your Mom and feeling very sad for the lack of love an connection. My heart goes out to you. I'll bet anything you have become your own authentic self, who is not going to be like your Mom. I know I strive to be me and not my Dad or his family.

    Whew..THAT was heavy...

    Peace all.

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  14. TINKA-- WOW..
    I have had my cry for the morning now..
    That was beautiful...
    I am sad on a daily basis that my mom is on the other side of the country...
    I really miss her... wish I could be closer ..so MEK and I could tag team ... that way it wouldn't be so much on her....
    But our lives take us where they take us... If I wan't married ..I would move closer...


    Shirley --Congrats on # 1 and thanks for breakfast...

    Good morning to--

    Want--
    Nowmercy--
    SCirish--
    EBJ--
    MEK--
    Dreama--
    AND Goldie...
    ?? brownies in the oven!!???

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  15. BITCH: FEMALE DOG
    BITCH: ME PMS
    BITCH: What I don't want to be called from time to time
    BITCH: When mixed with MOAN a very satisfying experience if kept short and shared with an empathetic friend.
    BITCH: Life, from time to time

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  16. TOTD. My parents have health issues. They are both 70. My Mom has Parkinsons Disease, has survived cancer and mini strokes that left lines in her vision. Her kidneys are at 50%. My Dad is on his third major operation. Whew! I do feel like I am the parent now. When ever I come into their home and sit down then my Mom will start off by telling me that my Dad did this or that or he said this or that that to upset her. It's always a silly little thing. Dad comes into the room. He has his say so about the little episodes or squabbles. It's like suddenly having two children on my hands. I always laugh it off and tell them to go to their seperate corners. My Dad always smiles and runs back into his bedroom and hops onto his computer. My Mother on the other hand is a bit more fussy and likes to always be right. Their latest fuss was over hand guns. My Dad keeps a loaded gun. My Mom can't use it. She wants her own. Honestly I don't think she should be sleeping with a loaded gun beside her bed because she has poor vision and a happy trigger finger.The gun issue came about because a neighbor's house was robbed on their quiet little cul de sac. I doubt seriously it's going to happen again because my nephew's uncle is hanging out in his police car at night just to see if the culprits might strike twice. Anyhow, next week I'm sure it'll be a different little fussy thing that I must resolve for them.:)

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  17. BITCH-
    Babe
    In
    Total
    Control of
    Herself

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  18. Excuse me, while I wipe the oozing jam and butter from my chin. Nothing like some warm homemade bread in the morning!

    IBB- brownies in the oven. And wait until tomorrow when I am snowed in- I am going to get really down and dirty with the baking!!

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  19. Tinka: That was beautiful and sad too. But you are right the circle of life.

    I think your daughter is being loving in the way she knows how for now. It is hard to think of the shift and realizing someday we will have to help our parents. Especially if they are strong and independent and full of life.

    MEK: Oh your post moved me. I want to remind you that your Mom may have had the same feeling raising you and you siblings too. I know I have. I love my kids to pieces but sometimes I don't like them. I take a minute and say did I raise you??? I then remember that with all, we grow and form our own way of doing things and thinking. Then I feel guilty!!

    I sometimes wonder too. That your Mom and others must feel resentment and anger that they can't fully do things for themselves and will take it out on the ones they love and feel closest to. I know not reasonable but oh so human.

    Shirley: 1st!!!! Wahoo and then you made breakfast too!!! Thanks!

    Good Morning Scirish, Nowmercy, EBJ and Dreama!! Hope I did not miss anyone!

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  20. LynnD-- you are so right...Mom told me to my face once..I will always love you.. But right now I don't like you very much!!

    That hurts so bad.. But at least she was being honest!

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  21. Good Morning Owls!

    Tinka: Your kind heart always shine through in everything you write. The love you and your mother have for each other is beautiful and touching. I don't have that kind of relationship with my mom so I think others who do are truly blessed. You both are being kept close to my heart and in my prayers daily. {{HUGS}}

    Waving Hi to the early birds:
    Shirley: Congrats on 1st and thanks for breakfast!
    Want2Sleep
    Nowmercy
    Scirish
    East Bay J
    MEK
    Goldie
    Dreama
    Ibebold
    Lynn D
    And all the other Owls who will be flying in soon!

    Mary/Mi: Sending feel better wishes.

    Hope you all have a lovely day!

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  22. Good Morning Goldie!!!

    Good Morning IBB!!!

    Bitch: Whining,moaning, complaining. Me on these frucking bp meds!!!

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  23. Loaded firearms? Wouldn't an ADT system be safer? Holy crap dreama that would scare the shit out of me.

    I have no issues with my mom, other than her forgetting that I AM all grown up. Same thing with my sister. She will always say things like "aren't you taking coat?" or "are you sure you took your medicine?"

    About 8 years ago we were in Marshall Fields in downtown Chicago. Getting on the elevator when my Mom turned to me in a crowd of people and said - LOUDLY- "Do you have to go potty before we leave?" OMG-I was mortified. I informed her I was 40 years old and think that I know if I need to potty or not! (dianne- not one word from you)!

    Now it is funny and still a standing joke in our family.

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  24. For the very first time I am here early enought to say a personal shout out to each and everyone. This thrills me.So happy Saturday to:
    Shirley
    Goldie
    Nowmerecy
    Ibebold & Mek (gotta put the sisters together)
    Want
    Tinka
    Skirish
    East Bay J
    M

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  25. O.K. Update for NASCAR fans...MEK's report of Jr.'s car being impounded..It is his Busch car NOT...NOT his CUP car!!!

    Scare a girl!!!

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  26. Goldie
    My Dad was raised around guns his entire life. I'm not too worried about him with a gun. My Mom always took target practice but geez now her vision isn't good.She isn't getting a new hand gun and that's my final word to her about it. This parent child has spoken. Ha!
    Texas has a new law that you can shoot anyone that comes onto your property that you feel are a threat. They no longer have to be in your home before you shoot. I'm sure that law was put into place for a reason but I keep thinking about all the teens who like to toilet paper homes (trees) in the middle of the night.
    Their neighbor put in an alarm system but it goes off every day. It's too sensitive. He's tried to adjust it but it still goes off. The police respond. Now the neighbors all ignore the alarm so I hope he doesn't ever have a real alarm event.

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  27. Hmmm, I'm thinking about getting 2 metal garbage can lids and banging them together over top of Joey's head and wake him up. It is almost noon time on the east coast.

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  28. Dreama- glad you put your proverbial foot down with Mom and her handgun!
    I grew up with a father and brother who hunted. My husband hunts and we have guns. But they are locked in safes, unloaded with the ammo locked somewhere else. The ONLY way I would let them in the house.

    The sun is shining, I am going shopping today and Mr. Goldie is making dinner tonight. Some days it does pay to get out of bed!!!

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  29. Dreama--Did you see how late he was up last night...
    He needs his bueaty sleep!!!lol..

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  30. Yeah.. Beauty ...
    not what ever I did write!!

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  31. We never had guns in the house growing up..My uncle did...But he was a Sherriff's Deputy.. then became the Chief Jailer..

    But Mr.IBB always had guns still does.. he got me one for Christmas last year...One of the men I work with said" He must be pretty secure if he gives his wife a gun!!"
    I know how to use them.. Last winter I took a firearms saftey course.. just so you can get a concealed weapons permit..
    You never know!!!
    I do live in the country.. with the big city real close!!!

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  32. Good Morning Feathered Friends!

    SHIRLY - Congrats on first!! And that breakfast...OMG!! I nominate you to be the official nest chef!!
    I am pigging out on your breakfast and can't wait to see what you cook us for lunch and dinner!!!

    TINKA - I love you, but why the hell did ya have to make me cry this early! That was so touching. It brought back so many memories of my mom in the nursing home...and just of my mom in general. Not only do we become the parents, we also seem to become our moms, too!

    I always hated it when my mom would tell me to drive safely. My respsonse to her would always be nah, I'm gonna drive like a maniac today! She would say very funny!And I had to call her when I got home. She would call and if she got the machine, every message was "Hi, it's mom. Drive carefully!" NOW, I tell everyone to drive safely and make them call me when they get home!!!

    There were times when she infuriated me, and I'm sure I infuriated her at times, but there was always, and will always be, such deep-seeded love.

    TINKA - {{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}} to you!

    BITCH - I looked in my picture dictionary and holy craparoni...there was my pic next to the word!!!!
    I think Tina snuck in and pasted my pic there!!!

    *WAVING HI* to MEK. IBB, GOLDIE, LYNN, AMICUS, DREAMA, WANT, SCIRISH, NOWMERCY, EBJ!!

    Gotta fill my plate again!! See ya later

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  33. I'm officially a sap.
    I'm watching MASH and it is the episode when Col. Blake gets discharged and can go home, and his plane was shot down and he dies. I am bawling, even though I have seen this episode 20 times.
    I'm such a sap.

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  34. MO..I cry every time I see that episode too...

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  35. Mo-- Did you know that they did not tell the cast that that was what was going to happen... They found out when RADAR .. came in and read it...And they handed the note to him(Radar) to read just before he wemnt into the O.R...

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  36. Whoops wasn't done.. They thought that way.. they would get get honest responce.. and NO acting!!

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  37. I am back to sort through the donuts. Who ate my frickin donut with the little colored sprinkles.Cough it up.

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  38. On second thought nah, don't cough it up.

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  39. Jelly donut and coffee. I can't find the coffee.
    Okay going to go brew a fresh pot of freshly roasted Brazilian coffee. It reads breakfast blend of light and dark beans.I'll make enough for everyone of course.

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  40. IBB - I didn't know that about the note and the honest reactions. WOW.
    I can watch MASH over and over! I remember when it went off the air and in Downtown Cleveland there was Last MASH Bash. There were thousands of us dressed in army style clothes! It was a Last MASH Bachannalia Bash!!! I guess it paid homage to Hawkeye and his still!!

    DREAMA - LOL @ at on second thought don't cough it up!!

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  41. Good Morning owls!

    Shirley Wow! Thanks for bringing breakfast with you so bright and early. Congrats on #1.

    Renee Eve Congrats on Owl Said. :D

    Tinka That was such a beautiful and touching blog.

    My mother will be turning 80 next month and she is starting to slow down. I am fortunate that my brother is there to help her. So far, she still holds the parental position in our family dynamics. I'm so fortunate that she has a great sense of humor. If we weren't related, we would still be friends.

    Nowmercy When my kids were 3 and 1 1/2 years old and I was now the sole parent, I started saying to them "I love you and I like you". This was because I wanted them to understand that the love was a constant, something they could count on, no matter what. When there was misbehaving or poutiness, etc., I would say, "I love you but I don't like you very much right now". They were allowed to sometimes not like me very much either. The love never waivered, though. It's perfectly legitimate for us to feel that way about our parents. Just because we love them doesn't mean we have to like them all the time.

    Goldie Be sure to go potty before you leave. ROFLMAO

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  42. Dreama I see you are bejeweled today. For a minute there I thought you had a skin condition. LOL

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  43. Tinka~~
    I think it's all about giving back the love that a parent gave to you. I'm constantly doing that to my mom. "How is your foot doing?" Last month it was her back, before that her hip, before that her shoulder. The poor woman always has a pain somewhere. But she is so independent now that it's impossible to get her to do the things you know she should be doing. You know like, take care of HERSELF for a change! Stop worrying about your grown kids who continue to make stupid mistakes! Not me by the way. My mistakes are always grand, not stupid!

    Tina~~
    I tried three times yesterday to read your blog. I kept getting interrupted. The last interruption was after 5pm when my daughter called and said her car was dead and she was stuck. Ended up being gone for 3-1/2 hours jumping her car, following her home, and then taking her and her boytoy out for dinner. So, as for what my "passion" is......sex, sex, more sex and ummmmm sex.

    Congrats on whoever was 1st yesterday! LOL! And congrats whoever had QOTD yesterday!

    Congrats shirley for 1st today! And crap....I already for got who had QOTD. I suck.

    Word of the day:Bitch~~would the definition be "Tina_in_UT"???? Bwaaaa haaaa haaaa! J/K Tina! You know I ♥ U!
    Bitch:female dog.

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  44. GOLDIE! OMFG HILARIOUS! I love your mom!
    I will have to remember to ask you periodically if you have to go potty~~

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  45. MEK~~ You and I have talked about your mom before. I know you are taking care of her alone (I'm sure ibb would be right there with you if she could), but I think your mother in her own private way, appreciates everything that you do for her. She most likely hates that she has to ask you for help all the time. She raised all those kids be herself, took care of your father, and thinks she can take care of herself. But in reality, she can't. That probably hurts her, and she takes it out on you.

    Either that or your mom is the word of the day.

    Sorry....had to try and get you to laugh!

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  46. Just Lin
    Yes, I blinged my owl. I worked on that last night before I went to bed. I went through owl after owl until I found the diamond jeweled one.Now we're talking. Yeah baby!

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  47. Good Early Afternoon Everyone!

    TINKA: Your blog was just beautiful. I am so glad you wrote it and sent it to CPGEM!

    I lost my mom two years ago, geez has it really been TWO years?? I was her caregiver. There were times she could be a little..well moody. I think it was because she was frustrated at not being able to do all the things she use to be able to do. The weekend before she had her aneurysm, she patted the spot next to her on the bed and asked me to sit down. She let out a big sigh and said "I know this hasn't been easy.." I started to protest, eventhough it was the truth, "But I just want you to know that you have been my angel here on Earth..and I wouldn't have lived this long without you." I had tears in my eyes and said "Aw Ma..shut up.." and hugged her. I am so glad she told me and so glad I got to be the one to take care of her.

    Now to catch up on the comments.

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  48. I just got out of bed to check on all the little owls.

    Carol - Thanks for printing my post and saying such nice words about it.

    Nowmercy -Thank you for thinking my post was worthy enough to send to your mom.

    Scirish - I gave you goose-bumps. I don't know whether that is a good thing or a bad thing. Ghost Whisperer gives me goose-bumps and that's always fun.

    Mek - It is very hard to experience your parents' change of personality. I see it all the time at Mom's lodge. Men and women who were so kind and polite all their lives are suddenly very mean and can hurt family members very badly. It is dementia and it is not their fault. I hope I can remember that if my mom's personality suddenly changes. Right now she is so sweet but I have seen changes in others that seem to happen over night.

    Goldie - I get the same joke from my kids about "putting me in a better home". It's a funny joke but only when you are young.
    I laughed at your "potty story". My mom has always introduced me to anyone new as her "baby". I used to get so annoyed at that between the teenage years and into my 30's. Now I think it is so cute.

    Nowmercy - How clever of your dad to address the issue of his mother's behaviour later in life. I see behaviour in people at the Home that makes me wonder if anyone could still love them. I say again. It's the dementia not the person that's being mean.

    Ibebold - It must be hard having your mom on the other side of the country. This is the situation for many people. Most of them at the lodge have no visitors. That's why a good care home is so important.

    Dreamatexas - Thanks for the prayers for me and my mom.
    It's interesting how Texas and Canada have such different laws. Here you are not allowed to shoot anyone even if they are in your home and robbing you. We have tough gun laws. The only way you can shoot anyone here is if he has a gun in his hands. And then you would have to prove he meant to shoot you. Some difference eh??

    Lynn D - Thank you for the kind words. Yes the shift is hard.

    Amicus - You always say the sweetest things. I wish you were my daughter. Thanks for the prayers.

    Maureen - Sorry I made you cry (after you always make me such great meals).
    The other day I came home from Mom's lodge, quickly wrote the post, sent it to Carol, and had a nap. I woke up with 'author's remorse'.
    I loved your "driving story".

    Barbar in Wa - You are right. It's all about giving back the love you received.

    ZonaBaby - Thank you for the kind words. I am so sorry. I didn't know it was two years ago you lost your mom.
    Your post made me cry.

    I am going back to bed. I feel like I have run the marathon. I will check back tonight. Have fun Little Owls.

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  49. I'm glad you all enjoyed breakfast. I guess according to Mo I am suppose to provide lunch and dinner as well. Here goes for lunch

    toss salad
    pasta salad
    assortment of meats
    sub buns
    condiments
    sliced tomato
    lettuce
    onion slices
    coffee and tea (reg, & decaf)
    soda
    juices
    extra sprinkled donuts for dreamatexas
    fruit salad

    Enjoy your lunch and I will be back with dinner later.

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  50. Tinka....you are a beautiful person and it comes through all the time, but particularly in the way you write about both your mother and your children. That was a fantastic blog and add me to the list of Owls who cried when they read it. I think your daughter was taking care of you because she has watched her amazing mother take care well of the ones she loves. And you wrote of something that I thought of alot when my Dad was sick. He died five years ago when I was 43, and before that required a fair amount of care. And I remember thinking frequently "at what point did I become the parent"? I remember heading out of his nursing home with a list of things I needed to pick up for him at the store. As I left I asked him if there was anything else he needed. And he said "can I have some candy?". That took my breathe away....how many times had I asked that as a child. And know he was asking me permission for something he wanted. And it confirmed indeed that the roles had changed...the parent had become the child. Staggering!!!

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  51. Here is what I JUST typed at yesterday's blog(never posted..brought it here when I realized what a nut I am..LOL)

    Somebody's deleting already this morning!?LOL

    Morning Owls and Owlettes! HAHA

    LOL@Jodi..I went to a free translator online, and I think I understand it!

    where are you all? figured you guys would be here chatting it up..Oh wait, you're on the NEW BLOG..omg i feel so stupid LMAO

    Okay, on to today! congrats Shirley on First!(be thankful I slept in..haha)and thx for that yumo breakfast!

    lol@want "sleep-typing"!

    LOL@MEK..Least one of my guesses were right;)

    lol@nowmercy and her bitch def.

    lol@IBB..I had heard that somewhere before;)
    LMAO@dreama with the trash can lids!
    Thanks IBB-I did need my beauty sleep...more organizing today:(

    hehe@dreama's blinged out owl;)

    OMG I LOVE the little owl with big glasses and the butterflies that zonababy sent me! thanks!
    for the record, I've only skimmed these comments lol
    Back to catch up later...Have a good day y'all!:)

    Oh and I saw only the title of the blog LOL..Makes me think of the Elton John song from Lion King!

    Word of the day:(used in a sentence Iteach..haha)

    speaking of Elton: " the bitch is back "! HAHA

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  52. LOL@me sleeping through breakfast and ALMOST lunch;)
    Thanks Shirley!
    **giggles at tossed salad and has flashforward memories to next weekend**

    ROFLMAO

    ..marches myself to the naughty mat and waits for Dan! LOL

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  53. WOTD: Bitch--what I have just become because I wrote out a long reply post and my internet froze up and now that post is gone. I used a few other choice words too (sorry TINA)but I'll put off explaining those until THEY are words of the day.

    MEK: I certainly know how you feel. I was where you are emotionally sooo many times. I've found that even the bad memories become ones that you cherish.

    SHIRLEY: Congrats on #1

    WANT2SLEEP: Very talented to be able to type and sleep! ;)

    GOLDIE: We don't have any kids--I know I'm headed for the home!

    IBB: Love your definition...but now I'm even more confused as to why TINA keeps calling me this, as I am NEVER in control!

    I think I will post this and see if it works...listen for the scream if it doesn't!

    ReplyDelete
  54. OK--quick before it changes it's mind!

    HI to SCIRISH and EBJ!

    NOWMERCY: Your posts are always so eloquent..I love reading them.

    LYNND: Sometimes meds can truly f*** a body up, can't they??

    MAUREEN: I cry anytime Little House on the Prairie is on..I don't even have to know what it's about--just have to hear that damn violin music!

    JOEY: I love the EJ song "The Bitch Is back"!! I remember blasting it in the car with the windows rolled down! "...stone cold sober as a matter of fact!"

    VIG: Good afternoon to Auntie Nort!

    Waving Hi to AMICUS, JUST/LIN and BARB! I am having such internet problems I hope I don't miss anyone.

    TINKA: You go and rest! Do I have to come up there?? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  55. Shirley
    thanks for bringing me the donut with the sprinkles. You are so kind.
    JOEY
    are your ears ringing. I spend all week long just being so sweet and kind, so on the week ends I'm a little chit head. My bad.:p

    ReplyDelete
  56. I just did a repost of Poz Mikey's Elton John video on Myspace. That was the wildest attire I have seen on him. Boy, I thought I'd seen it all. Now maybe I have.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Joey, what is the joke about tossed salad (should I be afraid to ask??)

    And what's next weekend?? I missed something!

    I've really loved reading everyone's stories today. What a wonderful subject.

    Goldie, I tease my mom and dad too and tell them if they aren't nice, they're going in a home some day!

    I'm the only kid that lives near my parents, one of my brothers lives in NJ and the other is in Germany.

    Both of my parents have been through cancer treatment (my dad twice). I try to not think about it, but always in the back of my mind the question lurks, what if one of them gets it again.

    They are both in their 70s and very active and healthy. They travel all the time (leaving Friday for Wisc. then from there to Ariz. Home for a week then to NJ). They just went to Germany. No slowing down yet, but I do worry about them and just wish they'd stay home! haha

    OK, be back later!

    ReplyDelete
  58. lol@dreama!:)
    LMAO@eastbayJ!YES be afraid..very afraid! LOL

    One of the owlettes surely knows what I mean;)lol
    and NO gay people did NOT start that!:)HAHA

    ReplyDelete
  59. Dreama, I saw Elton in concert back in '75, he played at the Cow Palace in SF.

    He put on a fabulous show, he is like Cher, changed outfits many times, and back then he was known for the wild sunglasses.

    I would love to see him again!

    ReplyDelete
  60. JOEY! Please message me on Myspace if it's too graphic. I don't have time to Google what tossed salad means right now, but I'm dying to know.

    Well not dying, but curious! haha

    Back later, we're off to look at some furniture!

    ReplyDelete
  61. Umm, I would suggest that no one click on Jason's link and get hacked.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Germany is awesome EBJ. I grew up there and loved it.

    ReplyDelete
  63. tinka
    I loved your daily blog today, so from your heart!

    I too have now become the parent, as my parents are elder and look for me to the things they would have done themselves. It can get very daunting at times, as I am single and enjoy my freedom so very much. However they did for me so I will do for them. I am lucky to have them both and I know this, so I shall continue to be there for them as long as time will allow.

    mek
    I am glad you hit publish, there is nothing wrong with you expressing your feelings.

    shirley
    Congrats on first! And thanks for breakfast and lunch.

    dreama
    Hmm...I saw that post from Jason, I deleted it, as I agree it is some type of spam or troll.
    I will continue to delete them.
    all do not click on any link's unless you know the blogger!

    ReplyDelete
  64. I am making this bold so it will stand out.

    Bloggers:
    Do not click on any link's unless you know the blogger!

    ReplyDelete
  65. Carol Thank you. You can ignore my email to you.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Y'all must have deleted the Jason comment!:)Thanks! I agree about the links only if you know them;)

    LMAO@EBJ! Okay;)will do!

    It is a BEAUTIFUL day here and I'm stuck indoors doing MORE organizing!

    Hey Carol!!:):)

    Btw, I saw Elton in concert in Columbia, SC in 1997!! LOVED it! My seats were fairly good and a man beside me let me use his binoculars briefly(I could see..it just let me see his nose hairs practically..LMAO) to zoom in on Elton..I could see the can of diet coke on his piano!!!

    The only thing I regret is that I had spent so much on transportation, lodging and at the mall shopping, I had no money left for a tour book!!:(:(
    LOL

    ReplyDelete
  67. LMAO@want..still "sleep-typing"!HAHA

    Okay, EBJ, you asked for it..check your inbox on myspace;)LOL

    Have a puke bucket nearby, as you may not be able to handle it;)LOL

    Off to be productive...P.S. the "other" blog has a surprise video!

    ReplyDelete
  68. Tinka~ what a beautiful blog~ Your mom is very lucky to have you and I'm sure she knows it deep down....the rest of your family, as well~ When my mom got sick, almost 2 years ago now, I remember one day helping her with her drainage tube and my sis was there.....we were having the hardest time trying to keep it clean but covered....and I looked up at my mom and she said, "Now I'm the child and you two are the parents!" I smiled and told her she was still the parent, but that we were just there to help~ She is so much better now and was a model patient! Then there's my dad! When he got sick in July, you thought the world was going to end! Well...actually, we all did think that....but as he got "better", he got meaner....this is the man who has always been quiet, caring, sweet, funny....now you just want to smack him every time you see him~ BUT.....it never fails, every time I fly down for one of his appointments, I return with some computer gadget or something for the kids or hubby~ EVERY TIME!!! I love him to pieces, but he's not always nice....but I can see that, in his own way, he's grateful for the help he gets from my sis and me~ This last time I was there, he said, "No more Mr. Nice Guy!" and I said, "Thank God! He was getting boring!" :)~

    Oh Tinka~ I loved your blog....thank you so much~ Now we have to work on getting Zona to write one! You know how she loves to write!!! :)~

    ReplyDelete
  69. SHIRLEY: Yum, thanks for the food. I was too full from breatkfast to eat lunch and I want to be ready for dinner.

    DREAMA: About that donut with the sprinkles, well, I hate the sprinkles off it so that is why you didn't recognize it.

    MO: Dang it. You were supposed to do Spoiler Alert. I didn't know that Capt. Blake's plane crashed!!! (just kidding)

    GOLDIE: I can't help it....so this potty thing as been an issue since you were 40? Maybe you should have warned us about it before you were spending so much time on the naughty mat. Don't tell your granddaughter or she may revert back and try and be like Grandma! Do you have to go potty? (Just checking).

    TINK: I loved your blog today. Boy, it brings it so close to home for so many of us.

    JODI; Thanks for all those batteries you gave me on myspace. I think we will have plenty for awhile.

    JUSTLIN: A big bowl of Custard you gave me. How sweet of you to finally start realizing you are going to share with me (don't tell Mr Dianne).

    ReplyDelete
  70. Hi, Owls! Tinkatia, I've been reading all the parents posts with interest. It's such a universal issue right now with us baby boomers.

    My Momis 75, Dad is 85. They still live together in an apartment in Kingston, Ontario, so we kids aren't in a caregiver situation... yet.

    BUT, the whole situation is dysfunctional. My Mom has had alcohol issue for about 20 years now, and the toll it has taken on the family has been considerable. My Dad has handled it by a succession of physical moves... as if that would solve anything... and each one has isolated my Mom further. Right now, they are a 3 hour drive from my Sister in Toronto (she begged them not to move there, and settle closer to her), I'm thousands of miles away in California, and my other sister is thousands of miles away in Canmore.

    What will we do when we get to the point where they need more constant care? I don't know. It's a constant worry!

    Mary in MI: Glad you got home wealthier than when you left! :)

    ReplyDelete
  71. I didn't really "hate" the sprinkles...I might have eaten the sprinkles!

    ReplyDelete
  72. I have lost both my parents. My mom passed away almost two years ago. They both were in a nursing homes at different times. My dad passed away 10 years ago. I spent so much time with my mom at the nursing home. During the last few weeks she would get scared. Now my mom could be a pistol PRIOR to getting older so we all knew she could be rather grumpy sometimes. I think it was like others have said, she just was so frustrated with herself that she wasn't able to walk and do things for herself as she was always so independent.

    One time when I was "parenting" my dad he reminded me that "he was still the father."

    ReplyDelete
  73. Ok, it's almost 6:30 here on the east coast so dinner is served. You have a choice of the following:

    poached salmon with beet relish
    potatoes with mint mayonnaise
    green beans with tapenade dressing

    spaghetti with lobster and chiles

    tuna kabobs
    marinated baby artichokes

    for dessert

    individual apricot tarts
    cranberry nut tarts
    pecan praline tarts
    apple tarts
    whip cream

    beverages

    coffee (reg, & decaf)
    tea (reg. & decaf)
    water
    soda

    Just want to say to Tinka what a lovely post. It is hard to look after a parent.

    My Dad lived less than 5 month after he had a stroke (over 8 years ago now). Although he was in the hospital and then a home I still went to feed him almost every day. He suffered from dimentia and the nursing staff didn't have very much patience with him. Some days he would be back home with his parents and other days he would be overseas in the war.

    He got angry a lot, but I think that was do to the fact that he had been a very active man and all of a sudden he couldn't do the simplist things...like reading, which he loved, going to the bathroom, eating. All the things we do every day and don't think what it would be like to not be able to do them. It must have been very frustrating for him when his mind was in the present.

    He didn't know me sometimes (he had a lot of "female friends" during the war) and called me names I didn't recognize. That was difficult. I was always a daddy's girl and to have him not know me was extremely hard. I wish I could have those five months back. There were days I hated going to that hospital and days I got so frustrated with Dad I wished I had never gone to see him. I would give anything to have those days back.

    Sorry guys, I seem to be rambling here. I did so much cooking today I am exausted. Enjoy the food. Someone else can do the cleanup, I am off duty! Enjoy the rest of the weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  74. Good afternoon Owls and Owlettes~

    Great TOTD Tinkatia. Your loving words have me balancing tears on my cheeks. So sweet and spoken so softly from your heart.

    Well I went and did it....I went to Jason's link and opened it up. It's Paid Surveys and "You too can join for only $69.95. Just use your major credit card or PayPal." Needless to say it was spam.

    It's so good to see everyone and hear the lovely stories. The 'Circle of Life' is very dear to my heart and with the passing of my mother in my arms a few years ago, I really can't write of these things. The love shown, through all your messages today, demonstrates what a warm group of people you are.

    On A Lighter Note.... I just love the way you people are always eating. So sweet of everyone to drop off their meals to be shared and enjoyed by all. Yummy too. Thanks so much.

    BTW, I'm really going to try to stay off the naughty mat, as it seems to be quite crowded. lol Besides, I see a reserved section with Goldies name on it. j/k (Goldie, if I do wind up coming there, I'll be sure to bring my purse).

    Luv to you all, and all your wonderfully sweet memories.

    Ronnie

    ReplyDelete
  75. Shirley (ncc-1701)

    Your meals have been so yummy today. You're such a great cook. Thank you, again. BTW, salmon is one of my favorites!!!

    Ronnie

    ReplyDelete
  76. Good afternoon all. I am doing a very weak fly by on my way back to bed.
    Thanks for the get well wishes. I hate being sick! Why are men so completely lost when it is time to make a meal? Their answer today was Wendys! I will just eat my soup and crawl back in bed.

    I had to make a comment on todays post. My mother has been gone 20yrs. Her last years were hard on everyone. She was hard to be around. We all look back now and realize a lot of it was her medication. We have decided to have "selective" memories. Only remember the good years and pray that our last moments are not so bad memories for our children.

    Whabbear~ I had no intention of giving the Casinos back any monies!! Now the Mall, that's another thing! Alas I didn't have time to do any shopping. My winnings are now nestled in the safe arms of my bank.

    I'm off to my comfy bed....sniff cough!! splat..hope I missed you!

    ReplyDelete
  77. SHIRLEY---OMG! You set the bar so high! How are you going to top this days food? LOL

    And since I am a piggy, I want some of everything!! And I want ALL the pecan praline tarts!!

    You are one fine chef young lady!

    Hi to everyone that has posted since my last one! The stories have been so heartfelt.

    I'm gonna pig out now!

    ReplyDelete
  78. Shirley
    Moweenie, um I mean Maureen won't share the pecan tarts.Those are my favorites. Wah!

    ReplyDelete
  79. DREAMA---wah wah wah!!! ok, I'll give you one tart (not Hodi or Tina or Lynn D type tarts!!!)
    Does my piggishness mean I have to go on the naughty mat ;) ?

    ReplyDelete
  80. DREAMA - btw, it's ok to call me moweenie, or mo or maureen or even pig girl!
    Just DON'T call me late for dinner! (or breakfast or lunch!)

    ReplyDelete
  81. Just one more fly-by to wave to all of you little owls...

    ~~~waving~~~
    To;
    Barb in Wa
    Mek in Az
    Amicus
    vig
    zonababy
    eastbayj
    dreamaintexas
    want2sleep
    joey
    Carol
    tina
    Maureen
    Goldie
    Tinkatia
    Jodie
    Just lin
    Whabby
    Dianne
    Lynnd
    IBB
    Renee Eve
    scirish

    I can't believe Mo at all the pecan praline tarts...thanks alot, Weenie.

    ReplyDelete
  82. Dreama don't worry, I thought somone would pull that trick so I made extra and hid them. Look in the pantry behind the big mixing bowls. Enjoy!

    ReplyDelete
  83. I almost choked on my salmon...RONNIE is foing to try and stay off the naughty mat??!!

    Yeah, like that'll happen! That would be like me trying not to breathe!!

    ReplyDelete
  84. Maureen you bitch!!!!!!! Did you get it?

    ReplyDelete
  85. SHIRLEY - you tart!!! There I am 101!

    Geeze, do you think you are MEK? 1st and 100th!!

    I guess that means you have to feed us again tomorrow~

    ReplyDelete
  86. Moweenie....we'll see who gets there first. Looks like you've got a good head start on me. lol

    Hear you're going to be getting a reserved card over there really soon.

    Ronnie

    ReplyDelete
  87. That's funny...SHIRLEY called me a bitch and I called her a tart!!

    ReplyDelete
  88. Did I win?!? Yeah!!!!!!!!! Yipeeeeeeee!!! I think you can have leftovers tomorrow. This kitchen is closed!! Yeah, I won. Nanner nanner nanner!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  89. Mo...you got called a bitch by Shirley. LOL LOL LOL

    She knows you well enough to bring extra tarts too.

    Way to go, Shirley!

    Ronnie

    ReplyDelete
  90. Ok I'm off to eat dinner. Catch everyone later!

    ReplyDelete
  91. RONNIE - -I am waiting for my gold embossed name plate for my own little (well big if ya saw my ass) spot on the mat!

    ReplyDelete
  92. ROFLMAO@shirley and Maureen!:)OMG y'all are too funny here;)
    Tart-bitch haha

    OMG Shirley, you are an amazing cook..I say since you were 1st and 100th..we give you tomorrow off! LOL
    How bout midnight snacks!?LOL

    I should be back later! Y'all don't have TOO much fun without me!
    I am slow maureen not putting 2 and 2 together and realizing you were "moweenie" LOL;)
    I totally remember you now!

    ReplyDelete
  93. Good afternoon owls. I am flying in for a quick minute to comment on Tinka's blog. Such a beautiful sentiment, Tinka, and as always, from your warm heart. Thank you so much.

    I was lucky enough to have both my parents until they were 91 and for the most part their minds were intact, even if their bodies were not so much. I remember after my husband's funeral, my father was so distraught at the reception that he didn't want to eat. He hadn't eaten for two days and my mother was very concerned about him. He said he couldn't cut his food and asked me to do it for him. It was at that point that the rolls reversed and I became the parent. He went downhill rapidly after that and he died about a year after my husband. My mother died almost 5 years later and I feel very blessed to have had them for as long as I did and we didn't have to deal with any form of dimentia. I was very close to my mother and I saw her almost every day and I still miss her every day. My Mother had a great sense of humor and when she turned 90, I said to her "do you realize how old you are and how close to 100 you are?" and she said "I didn't feel old until I realized my baby (me) was over 50! OUCH!

    I am packing for my trip to San Diego early Tuesday and I am ushering tomorrow so I may not be back until Monday. Have a nice weekend everyone.

    Oh, and thanks for the great food Shirley. Saved me from cooking.

    ReplyDelete
  94. Too funny that I had NOT read your post Shirley about "leftovers" when I was writing about giving you the day off tomorrow! LOL

    I am curious about the significance of your "ncc-1701" lol
    I used to think you were from NC haha
    If I'm being too nosey, disregard me! LOL
    OMG I love those tarts;) and GOTTA have the whipped cream!

    ReplyDelete
  95. The notorious Moweenie rides/flys/grunts again! Oink!

    ReplyDelete
  96. JOEY - -step away from the whipped cream!!...or include pics!

    ReplyDelete
  97. Joey NCC-1701 is the identification number for the starship Enterprise on the original series of Star Trek. Now I really am off to eat.

    ReplyDelete
  98. RONNIE - - have I said "oink you" lately????? bwahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  99. LOL@Maureen!After next weekend, there will be pics! ROFLMAO

    OHHH thanks Shirley..Don't hurt me, but I hate Star Trek! LOL
    (Still loving you..hehe)

    ReplyDelete
  100. sacbarb~

    That was a sweet story.

    Good to see you over here.

    Ronnie

    ReplyDelete
  101. It's been so long, if my memory serves me correctly, an oink might be good on a lonely saturday night. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  102. Joey, thanks for the awesome blinged out owl on Myspace. It rocks!

    ReplyDelete
  103. Mo.

    AND, just who do I tell to get you to the naughty mat?

    ReplyDelete
  104. LMAO@ronniegirl!:)
    I'll be getting "oinked" all next weekend..or is that "boinked"! LMAO

    Okay, I know someone is going to banish me to the naughty mat FOREVER!HAHA

    Go peep jax and birdee's comments;)lol

    ReplyDelete
  105. You're welcome dreama..I freaked when I found that one! LOL

    You were typing just now as I was!ha

    ReplyDelete
  106. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  107. Darn, I'm running out of alka seltzer cold medicine.

    ReplyDelete
  108. VIG - I just got a message from you saying if I hadn't picked up my morning paper (which I hadn't) there might be something there too. I found the most beautiful bouquet of purple and yellow tulips. How sweet of you. It suddenly pulled cyberspace right into my home. Oh I am sure spring is coming now and everything is going to be all right. Thank you my dear.
    Love, Tinka

    ReplyDelete
  109. I have just read all our entries and am so struck by the amount of pain everyone has faced, deep difficulties and powerful pain. And I am struck by the common caring and love that is expressed along with the funniest, grandest humor ever. Really, what special flock this is!! Waving my wings to MEKEBJAYGOLDIEDREAMAIBBGOLDIEAMICUSWHABBYGOLDIETINADIANESACBARBMARYMRENEEEVERONNIEBARBWAZONASHIRLEYJOEYVIGWANT2SLEEPCAROLGEMSUPREMETHANKSFORTHENEST!!!!
    IBB..lol bitch acronym
    GOLDIE..anymore brownies?
    JUSTLIN: thanks for story
    SHIRLEY: I'll clean up, thanks for feeding us SO well

    Gonna go back to mothering now..kiddo got eye exam today..we are sitting in the dark, listening to a book on tape while she knits by the fire... old fashioned. Later we will watch The Fugitive with fast forward past some of the yukky scenes.
    Have a GREAT NIGHT FLOCK!!! I'll try to check by later.

    ReplyDelete
  110. Tinka...thank you for the lovely thank you! After your heartfelt and amazing blog today and your days of taking it easy, I thought you definitely deserved a little bit of springtime! Between purple tulips and the crocuses (croci?)I saw by the Oak Bay library today, it is indeed feeling like spring here. Hope the signs of spring all around us here on the Island are putting a big smile on your face!

    ReplyDelete
  111. JOEY - Awwww, that comment pic was precious! Thanks!!

    You are so much nicer then that stingy Carol!!! She won't share her fruit slices and she called me a pig!!

    ReplyDelete
  112. Well mo there are reasons for everything, and being Piggy and trying to eat everyone's food is just not a good thing..

    Off to the Naughty Mat you Go!

    ReplyDelete
  113. joey
    Thanks for the great comment you left me on my myspace page!

    And those three guys are my nephews!

    My eldest nephew is the one with the tattoo peeking out. You are actually just getting a peek, as his whole back is covered!

    want
    Feel Better!

    mary
    You too, Feel Better!

    ReplyDelete
  114. want and mary-get well soon!:)

    Oh carol..well they're gorgeous:)LOL

    YW for the comment..I've been in a myspace "commenty" mood tonight..stepping away from computer for a while! LOL
    i'm gonna go cross-eyed:(

    ReplyDelete
  115. whabby
    Your honesty astounds me, as not many people would be brave enough to share as you did!

    It is amazing how your Dad seems to move away from you all, as a way to perhaps mask the problem?

    I do believe there is dysfunction is everyone's family, as I know there is in mine! I could really write a book about my dearest clan, but for now I will just stick with the blog!

    :O)

    ReplyDelete
  116. wow, pass the Kleenex!:(
    I could gather from most of your responses today, what the blog entry was about.... that's why I was hesitant to go read it seeing how most of you know about my Mom passing away 14 yrs. ago this November 7th!

    I raised my two brothers who I am very proud of and I feel like sometimes they are raising me! LOL
    I must have done something right because I say at times they've "turned out" better than myself..for that I'm very proud but I just can't seem to get it together sometimes! Thanks so much for sharing your story Tink..it was very well written and moving!:)

    The anniversary of my best friend's death is coming up also on Feb. 27th:(...That is why I'm SO looking forward to next weekend to try to take my mind off of it!:)

    **Sorry if I brought the mood down** didn't mean to..just wanting to share!

    I miss my mom more every day..She was only 44! I hope people who have their mom's still living, really and truly appreciate all that they've done for them all of their lives..I would give ANYTHING to tell her again how much I appreciate what she taught me and sacrificed for me!

    Oh and my brothers seem truly grateful now more so than when I was raising them..That warms my heart..My oldest bro I raised, recently sent me an email telling me how he knows that him and my little brother turned out great because of ME!!:)Talk about a happy cry! HAHA

    ReplyDelete
  117. Joey Your brothers are a testament to your love and sacrifice. You should be very proud. (((HUGS)))

    ReplyDelete
  118. joey
    I ditto what just_lin said.

    Kudos to you!

    Your mom is around you each and every day! She is in your heart!

    Please pass the kleenex!

    ReplyDelete
  119. Just stopped by to tell everyone to have a good night. I hope we all can be friends.

    Ronnie

    ReplyDelete
  120. Good Evening, my friends.
    Mr. Mek and I got home about an hour ago from our long day - we got wind burned in the a.m. and sun burned in the afternoon - BUT - everyone is ready for the tournament!! Tomorrow will be a day of rest for me!!

    I have had many tears reading everyone's posts today --

    I want to thank those who gave me words of encouragement and understanding today -

    Nowmercy - Thank you!! :-)

    Lynn D - I totally agree with everything you said.

    IBB - I know you wish you were closer and I wish you were closer also!!

    Barb in WA - love you - and NO, she isn't the word of the day!! LOL

    Zona - you made me cry!!

    VIG - we always took my dad a McDonald's ice cream sundae - he always looked forward to that - we had to feed it to him - he reminded me of a little bird - opening his mouth when he was ready for a new bite - and when it was all gone - he'd say - is that all??

    Joey - we all share here - thanks for sharing your story!! :-)

    I need to go take some more notes - Want still hasn't returned my pencil - but I'll give her some slack since she and Mary in MI aren't feeling well........

    OH - and most importantly -

    Whabby called on his way to the Lonestar!!! He says HI to everyone, his computer time has been limited this weekend!!! WAVING AT WHABBY - (he called RIGHT when I turned my phone back on from our meeting - great timing!!!!!)

    I hope everyone had an excellent day - (I'll be back with more comments!!!)

    OH - Goldie - do you need to go potty!!!?? i would have died!!!

    ReplyDelete
  121. Ok Hooters!!!
    I'm flying by (as much as I can with these damn cockeyed wings)
    to say squackhootbawkbawk.....

    Tinka, I love your post today! It's sweet just like you!!

    Now!!! If everyone would stop chewing on my ass, I might be able to fly in here more often. We chickenowls do need our Tail Feather's...you know!!!???
    Balance, people, Balance!!!


    I'm just being a bit lazy today..too many beers last night and not enough sleep. I will try to be around more tomorrow...so can someone try and clean up a bit? Seems like there has been some wet toots, oinking and boinking going on in here!! I'd hate to come in for a landing and have my cute little ass slide across the room!!

    Ronniegirl, nice to see you here!

    vig, Hello to you too!

    Shirley, waving to you too!
    I don't think I've had a chance to say hi to you hooters!

    Ok, back to the couch for me..need to change the bandage's on my ass first!

    xoxoxoxox

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  122. ROFLMAO@birdee! OMG that was funny!! I am seriously bout to pee laughing...Glad I had no food in my mouth! LOL

    Yeah I agree..balance..I can NOT step away from this laptop today and here it is nearly 10 pm! WTH??LOL

    oh the "wet toots and oinkin boinkin" got me..I'm still laughing out loud literally as I type! HAHA

    Oh and I had not read goldie's "potty" story until now..OMG too much! LOL
    It reminds me of kids that shout to top of their lungs in public about "peeing" or whatever HAHA..SO FUNNY!

    Thx to carol, just_lin and mek for your kind words about my story!:)

    ok stepping away now..OMG so hard 2 do here haha
    it's like the "good ole' days" from over there;)!

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  123. Ok, I just came back to say good night. Birdee "hi" to you and I hope your ass heals soon. lol! I have had fun interacting with everyone today. I usually feel more comfortable reading than posting but today was fun. Thanks. I'm glad everyone enjoyed the food and I'm sorry if you didn't get a praline tart. Some bitch (and she knows who she is)ate them all. Hopefully Goldie has made some of her special brownie you can all enjoy. Just don't let a certain someone have any. lol!! Good night all!

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  124. Oh, I forgot....word of the day..

    Bitch...What I was yesterday!!
    Hence, the beer!!
    xoxoxo

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  125. Joey....thanks for sharing your story. Your brothers are really lucky to have you in their lives. Glad you have something to look forward to to take your mind off a sad anniversary!

    Whabbear...I tried to find a myspace comment to send you to tell you how much I sincerely appreciated your honesty and openess. I couldn't find a comment and I send you a cyber hug instead!

    To everyone...your stories today have been heartwarming and heartwrenching and amazing and have made me realize that I am not alone in what I have experienced. I am thankful to Tinka for this blog and to all of you for your stories.

    Birdee...a big hello back at you!

    Zona...Auntie Notorious says how's it going Junior?

    MEK - sorry, I am not sure where you are or what you are doing, but I hope you are having a fabulous time! I just needed to tell you that your story about your Dad and the icecream made me cry. It is amazing what simple pleasures bring joy ...like icecream sundaes and a bit of candy. I don't know why, but I had forgotten until I read your post just now, that the last thing I brought to my Dad before he died was a root beer icecream float. We watched a hockey game and had rootbeer floats and that was the last thing I did with him before he went into a coma and died a week later. It's a nice memory and I am glad to have it back...thanks for your post!

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  126. JOEY - - Can you pass the Kleenex over here. Your mom is very proud of you. {{hugs}}

    BIRDEE - OHMYGODYOUAREACRACKWHORE!! That was the funniest thing I ever read!

    SHIRLEY - You tart! I think you are becoming a crackwhore, too! It was fun interacting with you today, too! And your comments were hilarious. You can call me a bitch anytime ya want! And what do you mean by saying goodnight...1.5 hours till ya bring us our midnight snacks!

    RONNIE - Of course we are all friends ;)

    CPGEM8 - Pfffffft!

    WANT and MARY - feel better soon.

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  127. *****SPOILER ALERT*********

    Goil's laugh has got to be stiffled! That laugh has got to go!

    I remember watching him on Top Designer on bravo...and he lost ;(

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  128. Just circling the nest to see who's home after being away for a couple days. Hope to comment on TOTD's later. For now, just wanted to give kudos to the new chef, thank Mo for keeping us fed for almost two months, and.....

    ((Birdee))~~ Check you page :o)

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  129. Tinka-Great Blog! I just got home from being gone all day at my sister's house.

    I know you worried about it and it is terrific. My grandma is in the nursing home right now and it is very hard on my mom.

    Here is the weird thing.

    My grandma loves being in the nursing home.

    However, it is tearing my grandpa apart,because he wants her home really bad.

    Off to read the comments!

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  130. Flying in to say hi. I see a few of my cohorts are on the naughty mat. Please remember the Queen likes to be in the center, so leave my space available. I am sure I will end up there soon enough.

    MEK- I should be good- no need for a potty! We still bring it up and its a family joke about someone having to go potty before we leave. But at the time i was just stupified, embarrased and indignant! I meant it came out of nowwhere for no reason. Not like I had a habit of peeing my pants or something!

    Personally, I prefer the apricot tarts, so I'm glad MO didn't hone in on those.

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  131. Thanks for all the kind responses to my post today. I will answer a few more and then I am off to bed for good this time. Yes Zona, I said "for good". I promise I won't get up again. Hey, I think the parent is becoming the child here.

    VIG - Thank you not only for the flowers but also for telling us your story. I guess with everyone there is a defining moment when the parent becomes the child. Wasn't that sweet that your dad asked you if he could have some candy?

    Night.owls.sb - Even though sometimes it is daunting, I know you treasure the time you have with your parents. It is always a complicated relationship.

    Tina-in-Ut - Your mom sounds like a doll. With respect to your dad, you are an example of having a parent whose personality changed. That must be hard. My heart goes out to you.
    Thank you for loving my blog.

    Dianne - It's amazing how similar all of our stories seem to be.

    Whabbear - It IS a constant worry. I pray when the times comes, you will be given all the help and answers you need.

    Shirley - My heart also goes out to you and your story. The nursing staff should have patience with those who have dementia. It is so frustrating for him and for you. I dread the day that my mom does not recognize me. It could happen at any time.

    Ronnniegirl - Thank you for the lovely words.

    Mary/M - What a good idea to choose 'selective memories'. Remember the good times and let the rest go. I am making a note of that.

    SacBarb - You were so lucky you did not have to deal with dementia. That is such a blessing. And for your mom to keep her sense of humor was a double blessing.

    Joey - I am sorry I made you and others (including myself) cry today. I think it is a good cry however. How lucky your brothers were to have you to raise them. It sounds like you did a great job. I think you are pretty neat yourself.

    Birdee - As usual you always say the sweetest things to me.

    Well I have had my two days of rest. It is back to normal for me tomorrow in more ways than one. For one thing I went the whole day and didn't eat one lovely morsel of food that the generous owls provided. Boy, tomorrow I am going to be the little piggy. Right now I have two new DVD's, "Hairspray" and "Dreamgirls" calling my name.
    Thanks for listening and supporting me today. I love you all. God bless you and your families, keep them safe tonight and always.
    Love, Tinka

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  132. Dang...I see I'm dropping my 'r's again. At least it wasn't the word "Virginia" this time. I'll never live THAT one down!

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  133. iteach - That is great that your grandma loves being in the nursing home. If the patients can adjust there are a lot of neat activities going on. It is sad for your grandpa though. Sometimes couples go in the home together. They seem quite happy in the same room.

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  134. aww thx tink and maureen:)

    I remember goil..What are y'all watching him on? I love me some david bromstad..he won design star too;)
    OMG I loved him since beginning..his show is fab..he's somewhat feminine..but i find him sexy:)lol

    birdee-your doggies made the big time..check ur comments;)

    Maureen-I am STILL laughing at birdee's post OMG! Lol

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  135. Tink- I haven't see either of those movies yet. Please let me know how you liked them.

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  136. Goldie, you reminded me of what I wanted to say LOL

    OMG Hairspray was amazing!!!:)
    i had seen the broadway show in NYC over the summer;)hehe
    LOVED IT!
    The movie is almost as good!:)
    Can't wait to see Dreamgirls

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  137. Joey- just saw my new comments :) I love the brownies one and the Doris Day is special. Why you ask? Ok, I'll tell you.

    My dad was in LOVE with Doris Day. When my sister was born he wanted to name her Doris. My mother said "over my dead body are we naming her Doris". So they compromised and her name is Moncia. She looks like a Monica. When I tease her I always say "hey Doris......" Que Sera Sera..

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  138. Tinka - I think sometimes a good cry is needed by all!! Thank you!!

    VIG - First, I am sorry that I made you cry and second, I am glad that I could bring back such a special memory - you made me cry again!!

    Goldie - Did you get approval from Aretha to use the "Queen" word!!

    Ronnie - I think alot of people don't know who you are yet!! This is a loving group of people and very accepting!! so, yes, we can all be friends!! :-)

    OH - VIG - I will be volunteering at the World Match Play Golf tournament this whole next week - SO, if anyone is watching it on tv - i am on the First hole on the green area!! :-)

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  139. You got to see Hairspray on Broadway? You lucky dog.

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  140. Did I miss something? Why would we not be friends with Ronnie???? Is my blondness causing mental complications again???

    MEK- The correct question would be has Aretha requested MY permission to be called queen....

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  141. Oh, I also tease my sister and tell her she was an oops baby (she wasn't)but I love to play with her mind!!

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  142. BON'O - - that pig made me laugh my pork butt off!!
    You are as bad as Birdee and Jax!

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  143. One last stop on my way to bed. Here are your midnight snacks:

    pretzels
    potatoe chips(Assorted flavors)
    popcorn & toppings
    juices
    sodas
    flavored water
    homemade cookies(choc.chip & peanut butter)

    Oh, and this little piggy (maureen) can go buy her own damn snacks!!lol!!

    Goodnight!

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  144. Goldie - I thought that I had missed something earlier also - but Ronnie asked if we could all be friends, so I was just assuring her that we were ALL nice people!!

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  145. LMAO at Shirley- sorry Mo

    Thanks for the snacks and sweet dreams!

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  146. Oh, good MEK. Thanks for the clarification. I had a moment of panic that we had drama in here. I am over drama. Slap my wings up someone head if need be.
    Welcome and extending a wing to Ronnie in friendship.

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  147. MEK....no, no, it was a good cry...those are the best kind and needed sometimes! Thanks for that!
    And oh, you are following your passion....golf!!! I just Googled the tournament...are you really going to get to see Tiger?! Wow!

    Tinka...thanks for your nice words. I loved your blog and am hoping you will write again very soon!! Now off to bed with you, young lady!!! Enjoy your musicals!!!

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  148. awww thx shirley

    Goldie, I cannot believe you didn't know about me seeing hairspray as much as I mentioned it on the other blog HAHA
    I do have some pics on flickr of NYC:)I will upload them to myspace this weekend..well tomorrow haha
    OMG that comment from JAX-hysterical!! with the pig, cow and chicken roasting the man! LOL

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  149. Tinkatia_
    That was a beautiful blog. I can't respond or I will cry....xoxo!

    Tina and IBB-
    Per area 51....I am not teasing!

    Shirley-
    Mo & Birdee have their own damn snacks roasting on the spit! Do not listen to their tales......they are not innocent!

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  150. Goldie - wait until IBB reads your comment about your little sister!! LOL..

    Shirley - thanks for the late night snacks..

    Iteach - you just reminded me of a funny story about my grandmother in the nursing home..

    She had a visit from the priest of her church and he was going to leave as they announced that dinner was being served - so he was walking her to the dining room - and there was a nurse a little ways up the hallway - and my grandmother blurted out - WHY DO ALL THE NURSES HERE HAVE SUCH BIG BUTTS??(everyone heard her) Father said to her - well, I hadn't noticed. Sadly - the last time that I visited her - she thought that my mom was a stranger and that I was her daughter - she kept asking me who I had brought with me..... it was really sad.

    Wow - I've got to liven this up - I am getting very depressed here!!

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  151. Joey- I'm blonde, what can I say?

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  152. Hi Hooters!

    Shirley you are so funny, you were cracking me up today.

    Damm, you're a good cook too!

    Again, loved reading everyone's stories. Lots to think about.

    Thanx to our Joey for telling me what a "tossed salad" is, who knew?

    MEK what is the special occasion that has Whab heading to the Lonestar on a Saturday? Isn't that a Sunday event?

    Almost time to call it a night, we are so boring here, in bed at 9:00.

    Oh wait, it's not always boring to go to bed at 9:00. Yowzzaaa.

    Nite!

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  153. VIG - you have brought me to my happy place!!! TIGER WOODS - OMG - YES, he will be here - and Mon and Tuesday, we can take our cameras for practice round - AND, TONS of pics I will be a taking!!!

    Goldie - YES, i am SO over any drama also!! :-)

    hey Joey - did you get to see Hairspray!! LOL (yes, I KNOW you did!!!) :-)

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  154. SHIRLEY - I see my bitchiness has worn off on you!!
    OH look over there...*stealing some popcorn*

    JOEY - Goil is a designer on Trading Spaces this year. I agree about loving David Bromstaadt...BUT, I dont think he is feminine...I think he is hunky!I want him or Vern Yip to do me, I mean do my house. Ooopsies!

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  155. Maureen! March your ass to the naughty mat right now young lady.

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  156. EBJ - about whabby - YES, when he called me saying he was on his way to the Lonestar - I thought I had missed a day - They are having a Bear Convention (Whabby - I hope I got that right) - i was just glad he called me sober and we'll let others get the drunk texting!! LOL

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  157. Oh, and Goil and his laugh is about as annoying as a pimple on my ass.

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  158. OMG mek is gonna be on tv..Yipee!LOL
    Mek-You and Mr. Mek are famous.peep your comments;)
    I think this is THE most comments I've ever sent in one day! LOL

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  159. MEK- get him autograph one of those pics for me will ya??

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  160. Maureen I saw that! You need a timeout on the naughty mat. March young lady!!!lol!!

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  161. Trading Spaces is getting ready to come on - is that guy you are talking about this new one that i can't stand - and YES, his laugh IS annoying and he laughs at EVERYTHING!!!!!!!! and it's NOT even funny......
    AAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH

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  162. I got A's in English too. Certainly can't tell now.

    That was get HIS not him autograph please

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  163. OMG MEK I remember the night at Whab's house, about midnight he was feeling no pain, he got his cell phone out and his fingers were getting busy!

    I think he was trying to call Jac in NY but it didn't go through or something! He cracks me up.

    Nite again!

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  164. LMAO@goldie..Ohhh yeah we'd have to fight over Vern or David..i mean david can do ME and vern can do MY APT. LOL

    Vern is amazing..love his new show

    ebj: B4 U GO NITE NITE....peep ur comments

    you too mek! LOL
    Mek, so we finally get to see you actually HOLD/SWING a golfclub!?! LOL

    I could not find ONE on your pics! haha

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  165. Ruh roh..time to get out of the way of the steamroller!!!! HELP!!! LOL

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  166. BB after dark is on Showtime now- boy they are vulgar. They are talking about all the things they can say on Showtime, and being live....

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  167. Goldie - LOL - sadly, I can NOT talk to the golfers!! :-(

    OH - we heard today - that last year - he stopped into Basha's to buy a candy bar and the grocery store was NOT ready for unruly behavior of their patrons!! LOL

    I can't imagine not even being about to go to the grocery store..

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