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Monday, June 7, 2010

Old Wives Tales

by Shirley

If you eat cabbage you will grow large breasts.(Jodi is this true?)

If your right hand itches, you will receive money; if the left itches, you will get a letter.

While pregnant, don't reach higher than your head.

If you sweep under a woman's feet she won't get married.

Cure a toothache by spitting into a frog's mouth and ask it to carry the pain away. (Dianne are you reading this?)

A sneezing cat is a sign of future wealth.

If you sew anything on Sunday; when you get to heaven you will have to pick the stitches out with your nose.

Throw salt over the shoulder to dispell bad luck?

An acorn at the window will keep lightning out.

If you spill pepper you will have a serious argument with your best friend.

If you drink coffee it will stunt your growth. (Jodi, Carol, Lynn is this true?)

Don't step on a crack on a sidewalk or walkway. You'll break your Mothers' back.

If you sing before seven, you will cry before eleven.

You can tell what kind of husband a man will make by the way he treats his mother.

Cure leprosy and the plague by swallowing a spider rolled in butter.

80 comments:

  1. Me!Me!Me!
    I'm prettiest!!!!!
    Ha!Ha!Ha!
    I Win!!!!

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  2. I guess my blinding beauty has made you all shy this morning.

    Come on out, it's OK!

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  3. lol @ Shirley.....

    Good morning Shirley...and yes...you have won!!

    Old Wives Tales crack me up....but when I was little...not so much...

    As a child I began my fascination with snakes....and it drove everybody crazy.....

    My Grandmother told me a tale of a little girl who had a pet snake that lived under a barrel. She fed the snake and it was her friend.....until her Mother found out!
    Her Mother killed the snake and by the end of that day the little girl was dead as well.....

    I knowwww!! OMG!!

    It seems....according to Grandmother...that the snake had 'charmed" the little girl...

    Moral of the story was "stay away from the snakes kid before you get charmed and end up dead".....

    That didn't end my interest in snakes....it flourishes to this day.....how ever I have taken precautions against getting "charmed" since Grandmother told me that story.....

    Everyone knows carrying a severed baboon penis with you will prevent snakes....and many other things...including some people from "charming" you.....

    Another old wives tale?? I think not.....

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  4. DeeDee you carry a severed baboon penis around with you and you're laughing at ME?

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  5. Shirley, You are a shinning beauty today!!

    DeeDee, Has that "tale" had an impact on how you perceive "tails?
    More-to-the point.."penises"

    Gottah run, I have some how lost or misplaced my drivers license. Who uses them unless you are traveling or showing them to an officer! I have no clue when I used it last.I have torn into my car,purses and rearranged my house. No license! Soooo I am off to the Sec. of States office before visiting family arrives.
    bbl

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  6. Well well, I wrote the blog, I'm the prettiest today (and always), plus I get QOTD (thanks Just Lin)! WoooHooo!

    Hi Mary and Goldie!!

    OK I'm off to Mother's!! See ya all later!! Behave...DeeDee!!

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  7. Old wives' tales... they annoy me to no end. What a way to warp a kid's mind. The next time someone tells me to throw salt over my shoulder, I'm just huckin' the the whole damn shaker at their head.

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  8. Good Morning!

    SHIRLEY: Good Morning Sunshine..you are positively glowing today!

    Well..I'm a salt thrower..and I kind of believe in the itching right palm means money in..although I've heard that if the left palm itches, it means money out..so I try to ignore it if it does. My mom always said not to touch your face when describing an illness or you would 'mark yourself'. I don't know if that one is true..but just in case..I keep my hands down..I don't need anymore marks, thank you very much! I always jumped over cracks in the sidewalks when I was a kid..I think it was a guilt thing. I've never heard of the other ones..but they sure are interesting!

    DEEDEE: I hate snakes..but I like Charming.. ;)

    GOLDIE: I hope the doctor gives you some good news tomorrow!

    MARY: If you're anything like me..the moment you get the new license..you'll find the old one. Very frustrating!

    BONACHI: I'll remember that! ;)

    Getting ready for another hot one today..but it looks like we are going to cool down into the 90's later in the week...woohoo!

    Have a great day everyone!

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  9. Zona, sorry to hear you're being roasted. Summer's here, yes?

    The tale you told of touching your face when discussing illness... that makes sense to me. If you've got germs on your hands, you shouldn't touch your face. The salt one baffles me. And the cracks... I was terrified of stepping on one as a kid. Worried constantly that I'd do it accidentally and hurt my mother in the process. It just seems like a big burden to put on a kid.

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  10. yes.....but if you were pissed at your mother, didn't you find yourself jumping up and down furiously on all the cracks you could find? My back hurts constantly~

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  11. Morning Glories!

    Shirley you are stunning and blinding in your Victory....er beauty today!

    Good to know that it is the right hand that brings money. I can never remember. I thought left hand meant money gone. Letter is better.

    The spider one has me confused. Do you have to eat a specific kind of spider or will any eight leg creature do?

    I always liked the find a penny one. Tho never seen that it brought me much luck.

    Dianne should we all send you some froggies?

    Thank goodness I don't sew! How in the world would you pick stitches out with your nose?

    Lordy people will make anything up to amuse themselves.

    What is then one about getting nekkid at the full moon or is that blue moon?

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  12. Zona, I found my license!! On a hunch, I looked in my travel bag. The one I took too Chi Town last month. There it was in one of the side pockets!I hate to fumble in my purse at the airports so I put my itinerary,documents and I.D. where I can get to it fast.
    I have been driving around without it all this time!

    Back to cooking my Spanish rice,enchiladas & tortillas......

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  13. Forgot to wave @ Goldie,LynnD,Tina & Bonnachi~~~

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  14. BTW I did find it before leaving the house lol!
    Now I have my "going-to-the-license- place-store" on, for nothing!!

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  15. I have wanted to "see a penny pick it up and all day long you'll have good luck" for sooo long....

    but omg...if I did I can just hear the talk...besides...you really don't know where a penny has been....my luck I would pick one up infected with the Ebola virus or that flesh eating bacteria....

    Money is so filthy....and for some reason I am not supposed to repeat this...but it will be alright with you guys.....my accountant has told me that my money is laundered...and that makes me feel better.....

    Cleanliness is next to Godliness....

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  16. Shirley Your beauty is, indeed, blinding. I had to put my sunglasses on. ;)

    DeeDee LOL @ your laundered money. The next time you have any transactions with a government agency, you should really let them know about this money laundering. They will be impressed, I'm sure. ;)

    Mary I was all set to suggest that you probably had your license out the last time you traveled but I see you figured that out already. Yay for finding it!

    Goldie It must be frustrating to only have one useful arm. At least it's only temporary. Hang in there.

    Bonach You have to wonder if some of these things weren't just made up by someone long ago just to see who would be stupid enough to believe them. Talk about a power trip!

    Zona It's going to cool down to the 90's, huh? You must have a cold front coming in. LOL

    Tina Your back is probably more troublesome than mine because I only have two kids. ;)

    LynnD I don't recall one about being naked on a full or blue moon. Did some guy tell you that while you were on a date, by any chance?

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  17. Happy Monday Owls.

    Shirley, you are dazzling today. Old wives tales always amused me. BTW, are they tales that were told by old wives, or are they old tales told by wives? Whatever! Now that spider one, must it be real butter or will the more healthy butter substitutes do?

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  18. Tina, stop pissing your kids off and your back will feel much better.

    Lynn, well, you were a penny richer.

    Goldie, I hope the doc will give you some positive news.

    Carol, It sounds like you really had a good time in NYC. I hope it relieved some of your stress.

    Zona, I'm sorry I missed your blog yesterday. I do like Barry's songs and that is one of my faves, but I agree about watching him.

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  19. Hey kids, I have a small favor. My youngest son was told today that his company has run out of money and everyone has been laid off effective today. He was working for a small start up web design company with a bright future, but the downturn in economy has affected them, like everyone else. So I am asking for prayers or good thoughts. His fur baby has been very sick recently and they have spent all their savings on Vet bills and they puppy still needs surgery, so he really needs to find a job quickly. Thanks.

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  20. SacBarb I'm so sorry about your son being laid off. So many are facing the same bleak news. I will be keeping my fingers crossed that he finds other work soon and that his pup will get the treatment it needs.

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  21. Shirley: Those were fun and congrats on your true shining beauty today. The only one I am sure of is that you can tell what kind of husband a man will make by how he treats his mother.

    I am having a bad Monday..please everybody...feel sorry for me. I got a speeding ticket..and it was so stupid and I am so mad about it. Uggh. And, crying doesn't work.

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  22. OH Sacbarb: So sorry to hear your son's troubles. :( I hope he finds something quickly..how sudden and how awful.

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  23. Mary: Glad you found your license. I miss you, can I come to dinner..it sounds delicious.

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  24. Oh Bebbi, that really sucks! I hear DeeDee's making a trip to the Caymens... something to do with laundry. Maybe she'll pop by in her jet and take you with?

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  25. Good evening feathered friends!

    SHIRLEY...shining bright and beautiful this morning! BTW...did you cheaqt to get 1st? IJA!!

    fun blog! I used to avoid cracks, until I came here with all the cracks-whores!! bwahahahaha!!!!

    SACBARB...thoughts and prayers to your son to find a new and even better job SOON. And I hope his pup is well soon, too.

    JUST LIN...has your cold finally gone away?

    GOLDIE...I hope the doc gives you good news tomorrow. **fingers crossed**

    ZONA...thinking I am gunna hunker down with some Alec Baldwin on SNL dvd and enjoy the cool breezes wafting thru the windows!

    MARY...glad you found your license! And dinner sounds delish!

    BEBBI...sorry you're having a crappy day. Were you in the car speeding or just walking really, really fast?

    Note to self...stay far away from CHI CHI when there is a salt shaker within reach.

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  26. That would be nice. *sigh* rough day on the farm. :(

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  27. SacBarb; I read today that Zynga (the folks who brought you FarmVille, etc.) just bought another company in Austin. The Zynga offices are in the central/north CA area. It might be worth a look for your son.

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  30. Shirley, loved the old wives tales!

    I just had a buttered spider for dinner, yum. hee hee :)

    SacBarb, so sorry to hear about your son. That is happening to sooo many people.

    Will keep positive thoughts for him and his puppy.

    Bebbi if you lived in Calif. you would not only have gotten a speeding ticket, you would have been fined $20 for using the cell phone while driving.

    The second cell phone offense is $50

    We are only allowed to use "hands free" devices while driving and I think it applys to bicyclists, too.

    Goldie good luck at the dr. tomorrow!

    OK, looking forward to the "big drama" on the Bachelorette tonight.

    MR. EBJ gave me a pathetic look when I mentioned this to him earlier HAHAHA!

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  31. SHIRLEY...OMG...I nearly spit out my soda!!!

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  32. Maureen...how DARE you say I cheated!!!! Just because I'm so beautiful and you are JEALOUS of that there's no need to say stuff like that!! tsk!tsk!!

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  33. Holding my green with envy head down in shame...

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  35. Bebbi go walk around your state a couple times, you'll feel better!

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  37. EBJ did you use salted or unsalted butter?

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  39. Shirley I buy unsalted, it was deeelish

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  40. Hey Bebbi I have a joke for you.

    knock knock
    who's there?
    cargo
    cargo who?
    car go beep beep!!!

    Oh come on that was funny! Smile! Laugh! You won't have sex dreams if you go to bed upset!

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  41. OK I need to go to Facebook to check my non-farm, non-cafe, non-aquariama, non-mafia wars, non-tropical island, non-pet ville, non-sportsbar, non=mushroomville, non-penistown, non-zorch city, non-ballville, etc.

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  42. I forgot to ask DeeDee if she has been in any pain lately?

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  43. SHIRLEY...I think the joke goes like this...

    Knock knock
    Who's there?
    Cargo
    Cargo who?
    Cargo too fast and get speeding ticket!!!

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  44. Non penis town? That can't be much fun!

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  45. EBJ...next time try garlic butter...oh so much more flavorful and gourmet-ish!!

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  47. BEBBI...we LOVE you and just want to make you smile...even just a little

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  48. ♫ No one likes me,
    everybody hates me
    Guess I'll go and eat some worm.
    Big fat juicy ones,
    Long thin skiney ones.
    Guess I'll go and eat some worms.♫

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  49. Bebbi, dam the luck! I was lucky not to have gotten stopped these last 5 wks with no license in my purse! Once I noticed it gone I was paranoid as hell!! Now go put your insurance slip in your car!!

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  50. No No No Maureen!!! Garlic butter goes with vampire bats not spiders!!!

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  51. Shirley, my bad, I do subscribe to penis town! :)

    MO, fantastic idea!

    Bebbi you are popular here, how can you think anyone hates you!

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  52. Shirley sounds like you're singing about penis...

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  53. SHIRLEY...silly me. I thought you prepare vampire bats with the juice of a blood orange.

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  54. EBJ...have you signed up for scrotal suburbia yet? You have to build the most ball fields in the park!!!

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  55. Hey my comment to DeeDee only half came out!! It was suppose to say that I was furiously stabbing a pin in a DeeDee voodoo doll!

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  56. Alright you filthy varments thanks for all the comments today on my beauty...I mean my blog!! I have to go to bed. Nighty night!!

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  57. SHIRLEY...sweet dreams! It was fun playing tonight...I sure needed it!!

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  58. penis,peter,birdee,pecke,whopper,poo poo,ding-a-ling...
    Let me see, I know I am leaving something out...

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  59. Nite Shirley. I wonder if you will have penises dancing in your sleep tonight lol!!

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  60. MARY...what did you put in those enchiladas...tequilla!? LoL

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  61. What's going on with the comments? Are they being auto-deleted?

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  62. Mo I need to check that one out!!!

    Mary you forgot Max and the twins on your list.

    Also, Russell the one-eyed muscle.

    Nite Shirley!

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  63. Off to bed.

    BEBBI...I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. And remember we LOVE you.

    Sweet dreams to all

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  64. OMG EBJ!! Sit out my"COLA"!!

    Mo, Now there's an Idea!!

    I am off to bed. Everyone is asleep but me. My Montana family will be up early.
    Nite all, it's been fun!!

    Bebbi!!!!!!! Come back!!!

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  65. A watched pot never boils....except I think that is true. Dang, where were the frogs for that toothache when I needed them...and why didn't I know the saying? I hope there won't be a next time.

    SHIRLEY: On Jay Leno tonight on headlines they showed that boob separater and Leno had the same comment/idea DEEDEE had to use instead of it. (I haven't read comments yet so hope I am not repeating someone else). SHIRLEY, did you send it in???

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  66. MARY: Was your "travel bag" your Bronco bag? If not, that is probably why it was lost....I am sure you carry that bag all the time and you would have seen it in there.

    Why are there so many deleted comments today and TINA .... just because you weren't first didn't mean you couldn't comment most of the day.....

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  67. Well...I don't know if it was the cabbage :p

    I do remember doing the whole "don't step on a crack" thing when I was a kid!!! Still kinda do that. And my Mom always said "pick up a penny....give it to a friend". I guess she was paying the good luck forward ♥

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  68. BARB - I hope your son finds a job soon!!

    SHIRLEY - Your little ditty about the worms made me smile. The kids learned that song in kindergarten!!

    BEBBI - Sorry about your ticket. I've only had ONE ticket....and didn't get it until about 4 years ago. I hope your Tuesday goes better!!

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  69. ZONA - Thanks for the "sunshine" today!! OMG....Puppy Love....swoon!!!

    SLIN - That card cracked me up!! Thank you ♥

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  70. DIANNE - I agree...TINA....little Miss Hit and Run!!

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  71. Thanks J/L, Mo, Jodi and Bebbi for the prayers/good thoughts. There are so many in the same boat I just hope he can find something very soon.

    Bonachichi, thanks for the tip. I'll pass it on to my son.

    Good night and sweet dreams to everyone.

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  72. Good night BARB!!

    Time to get prettied up for work ♥

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  73. 80!!! Just for shits and giggles!!

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  74. General Hospital fans...

    Brenda Barrett (Vanessa Marcil) is returning in August!!

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