REVOLUTION GIRLS

by Just Lin

I saw this group on the Late Show with David Letterman the other night and thought it was quite a catchy tune.  I can't say that I'm a fan of mariachi music but this group is a little different and I found myself tapping my foot and moving to the beat.  I hope you enjoy it, too.

Bad Tattoos

by Zona

~ Choosing Your Religion ~

by Tina~in_ut

This is as big as I could get it. I hope you can read it. It made me laugh~

~ Dirty Mind Quiz ~

by Tina~in_ut

Do you have a dirty mind? Take this simple quiz and find out. See if you can determine what is being described in the following ten items:

1. When I go in I might cause pain. I cause you to spit and ask you not to swallow. I can fill your hole. What am I?

2. A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you’re bored. The best man always has me first. What am I?

3. I’m spread before I’m eaten. Your tongue gets me off. People sometimes like to lick my nuts. What am I?

4. I go in hard. I come out soft. You blow me. What am I?

5. All day long it’s in and out. I discharge loads from my shaft. Both men and women go down on me. What am I?

6. I come in many sizes. When I’m not well, I drip. When you blow me you feel good. What am I?

7. If I miss, I hit your bush. It’s my job to stuff your box. When I come, it’s news. What am I?

8. I offer protection. I get the finger ten times. You use your fingers to get me off. What am I?

9. I assist an erection. Sometimes big balls hang from me. I’m called a big swinger. What am I?

10. I’m at least 6 inches long. I leave foamy lubrication when engaged in my job. What am I?
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Answers:
1. a dentist
2. a wedding ring
3. peanut butter
4. bubble gum
5. an elevator
6. a nose
7. the paperboy
8. a glove
9. a crane
10. a toothbrush
How did you score?
All correct – Your mind is as clean as a whistle!
7 – 9 correct – Your mind is still pretty clean. OK to bring you home to meet mom.
4 – 6 correct – You’re average.
1 – 3 correct – Your mind is definitely headed toward the gutter…
All wrong – YOU HAVE A DIRTY MIND!

Girlfriends

by Sac Barb

This made me laugh . . just had to share with you.


A group of 15 year old girlfriends discussed where they should meet for
dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Dairy
Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they only had $6.00
between them and Jimmy Johnson, that cute boy in Social Studies, lives
on that street and they might see him and they can ride their bikes there.


10 years later, the group of 25 year old girlfriends discussed where
they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they
should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap,
they had free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover and there
were lots of cute guys.


10 years later, at 35 years of age, the group once again discussed
where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that
they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the cosmos were
good, it was right near the gym and if they go late enough, there
wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.
 

10 years later, at 45 years of age, the group once again discussed
where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that
they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were
big, and the waiters there had tight pants and nice buns.


10 years later, at 55 years of age, the group once again discussed
where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed they should
meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food there was
reasonable, the wine list was good, they had windows that open in case
of a hot flash, and fish is good for your cholesterol.


10 years later, at 65 years of age, the group once again discussed
where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they
should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because lighting was good and
they have an early bird special.


10 years later, at 75 years of age, the group once again discussed
where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they
should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because food was not too
spicy, the restaurant was handicapped accessible and they even had an
elevator!
 

10 years later, at 85 years of age, the group once again discussed
where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they
should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been
there before.

~ Women's Golf Terms ~

by Tina~in_ut

Caddy
2 women talking about a 3rd, who isn’t there to defend herself.

Chip
Time to get our nails done again.

Double Bogie
"Casablanca" followed by "African Queen".

Fairway
Splitting the bill when the girls go to lunch.

Good lie
Weight on our driver’s license.

Greens
Lunch we eat when you’d really prefer a cheeseburger.

Iron
What men need to learn to do their own shirts.

Rough
Getting a man to understand, well, pretty much anything.

Slice
No thanks…just a small portion.

Par
The children’s grandfather.

Birdie
Another attractive female golfer.

Wood
Where you can find a ball.

Get Out Of The Car!

by Sac Barb

This is dedicated to Maureen and Just Lin.