Should we judge a book by its cover?

by Bonacci

I would like to introduce you to Oderus Urungus. He is the frontman for a band called GWAR. You can find GWAR’s music in any music or book store. Remember Elvis? The Beatles? How about the Stones or Led Zeppelin? Well, this is what the youth of today is listening to. Not so popular, I think, but mention the band to a teen you know and they’ll probably have to scoop their jaw up off the ground after realizing you even know there’s such a thing as GWAR. Oderus is the product of a super computer and a Petri dish. So he says. Really, he’s Dave and he has a real mom and dad. His stage persona is that of an evil being. No good. He sprays his fans with fluids during his live shows. An oxygen thief if ever I met one. I don’t like his music, I don’t like his attitude and I don’t like looking at him.

Then he went and screwed me. He was driving in Pennsylvania and happened upon a woman, in her 50’s or 60’s, who had a flat tire on her car. Oderus morphed into Dave. Dave stopped and changed the tire for the woman, who was grateful and found him to be a delightful man. She asked how she could repay his generosity, and he told her she could never mention he changed her tire. It was bad for his image. He then explained who he was and why he didn’t want news that he might be a decent guy to leak out.

I am not the first to “out” Oderus. The woman wasn’t either. She kept her word. It’s just not common knowledge. Just like the existence of anything called GWAR isn’t common knowledge, at least to us. My point is that I will never “like” Oderus. I’ll never like Dave because he becomes Oderus. But whoever this thing is, he is a human being and he is compassionate. I know of at least one woman who thinks he’s a gentleman and a stand-up guy. The moral? No matter how disgustingly ugly the cover is, the book might not be so bad.