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Friday, September 2, 2011

Redneck Engineering At It's Best!

by Zona













32 comments:

  1. good Morning....

    this avatar deserves the patented BAMM BAMM and around the world snap!

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  2. Morning Glories!

    MeeMee did you have an accident? Must have been a bad one if theey have to soap and hose down you and the vehicle.

    Mr. Lynn D and I like the last one zona it so looks like some thing we would do in desperation to cool down the computer. lol

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  3. hahahahaha...I didn't think of that Lynn....lol

    That would be more "up my alley!!"

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  4. Good Morning Michael - Please explain your avatar to me. Being a Canadian takes me out of the loop when it comes to political jokes.

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  5. Good Morning Lynn - I like the last one too but I also like the homemade air bag.
    I am so happy to hear Emma is doing so well. Is she now a year old?

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  6. Zona - Thanks for the laugh this morning. I love Red Neck jokes. When Jeff Foxworthy was on TV my sister and I would have such fun listening to him. The only ones I can remember are "You must be a redneck is you refer to grade three as your senior year", and "You must be a redneck is you and your mom had the same homeroom". He had hundreds of them. He must have stayed awake in the middle of the night thinking up new ones. Does anyone else remember any redneck jokes?

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  7. Well, we have come into Labour Day weekend with a stretch of lovely weather. I hope it lasts. I am excited about going to the Saanichton Fair this year. The last two years were the only two I think I ever missed because I couldn't walk well. This year I am taking the scooter. We are going Sunday and I am excited about it. Cara and her family always win so many prizes for their jams, vegetables, fruits and art projects.

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  8. I must check out my farms. I now have eleven farms on Farmtown and four on Farmville. I wish I could trade in my billions of Farmcash for Canadian money. What a blog party I could have. I would be able to fly everyone here to see Victoria in all its glory. I can dream can't I?

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  9. Tina - I hope you are feeling better today. Thinking about you.

    Wishing all owls a happy and healthy Friday. See you later.

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  10. Hi Tinka!

    My avatar is a very hot man washing his truck with his pants around his calves....

    I was listening to Jeff Foxworthy once and he discussed words and they are used in the north and the south.....such as mayonnaise..

    with rednecks in the south the word is completely different...

    for example...."mannaise alot of guys painting on nat house!"

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  11. Jeff Foxworthy

    I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

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  12. you may be a redneck if.....


    Think “loading the dishwasher” means getting your wife drunk.

    You ever cut your grass and found a car.

    You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren’t.

    You think the stock market has a fence around it.

    Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater.

    Your boat has not left the drive-way in 15 years.

    You own a homemade fur coat.

    Chiggers are included on your list of top 5 hygiene concerns.

    You burn your yard rather than mow it.

    Your wife has ever said, “Come move this transmission so I can take a bath.”

    You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.

    The Salvation Army declines your mattress.

    You’ve ever raked leaves in your kitchen.

    Birds are attracted to your beard.

    Your wife’s job requires her to wear an orange vest.

    You were shooting pool when any of your kids were born.

    You have the local taxidermist’s number on speed dial.

    You’ve ever hit a deer with your car…deliberately.

    Your school fight song was “Dueling Banjos”.

    You think a chain saw is a musical instrument.

    You’ve ever given rat traps as gifts.

    You clean your fingernails with a stick.

    Your coffee table used to be a cable spool.

    You keep a can of RAID on the kitchen table.

    Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

    Your mother has “ammo” on her Christmas list.

    Every socket in your house breaks a fire code.

    You’ve totaled every car you’ve ever owned.

    There are more than five McDonald’s bags in your car.

    The Home Shopping operator recognizes your voice.

    There has ever been crime-scene tape on your bathroom door.

    You’ve ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.

    The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape.

    You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.

    You’ve ever bathed with flea and tick soap.

    You think “taking out the trash” means taking your in-laws to a movie.

    You have every episode of Hee-Haw on tape.

    Your kids take a siphon hose to “Show and Tell.”

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  13. Oh! I forgot this one! Picked it special for Tinka and Jack!!


    u may b a redneck if....

    You throw a beer can out the truck window and your wife shoots it.

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  14. and I can't forget Tina!!

    You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are...

    “Gentlemen, start your engines.”

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  15. DO NOT....and I REPEAT...DO NOT...make me laugh!!!!!

    gentlemen.....start ur engines.....well I NEVER!~ humpht~

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  16. Zona~ Loved this one....makes me laugh every time I look at the pics...laughed the whole time I was loading this blog in....thanks for sending it~ LOVED the make shift BBQ~

    Tinka~ I'm doing better....just can't laugh yet~ :D Have fun this weekend~

    Good Morning LynnD~

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  17. "number of the day!!!"

    $1,197,000,000,000: The amount of US dollars spent as of June on the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. That's one trillion, one hundred and ninety-seven billion dollars.

    I can't wait until Congress is back in session so we can listen to them continue to squabble over "entitlement programs" that we can't afford.

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  18. Jeff says:

    You idea of talking during sex is “Ain’t no cars coming, baby!”

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  19. look! Two at once!

    You have 5 cars that are immobile and house that is!


    You gene pool doesn’t have a “deep end”

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  20. Hi, everybody! Checking in from San Francisco... peaks, that is, north of Flagstaff in Arizona! Very interesting local terrain... eroded remains of an ancient volcano!

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  21. considered sacred ground Whabbear....

    oh beware the eagles silent flight..
    be safely far by the fall of night..

    ew-ya-ya-ya-ew-ya-ya-ya...rattles beads...

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  22. Michael: I just wikipedia'd the history of these mountains, and you're so right... they're sacred to all the indigenous tribes! I hope Desert RATS (google if interested) isn't situated on top of an ancient burial ground!

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  23. Zona, those are soooo funny. I especially like the "power" window.

    Michael, So your avatar has his pants down...does he have to pee???

    Lynn, only 12 more days.....

    Tinka, Have fun at the Fair.

    Hi Bear.

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  24. You know you're a redneck when you go to the family reunion to meet women!

    I loved the one where they mowed the lawn and found a car!

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  25. Afternoon Glories!

    Any one have a redneck cure for the creeping crap. It feels like I have the mumps. I had theme as a kid and this feels awfully familiar.

    Tina don't laugh!

    Hope everyone is having a better day than I am. ;)

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  26. Sacbarb I can't wait! I think I am kind of lucky I feel like crap this week. Hopefully it will be gone soon.

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  27. Oh Lynn, I sooo hope it is gone in a week. You need to feel better. Mega-dose with vitamin C. That's supposed to be a cure-all!

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  28. Whabbear!

    You and NASA better get the MARS surface filmed and be outta there by sundown....

    and this time clear any lunar landing junk out of the shoot....ga!

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  29. Michael - I have been busy all day and this is the first time I have had to check back on the blog. Thanks for all the red neck jokes. I love them. I read them to Jack and I laughed again with him. He loved the one you picked for us.

    Barb - Thanks, we are going to the fair Sunday. I am excited about it.

    Tina - I am glad you are feeling better.

    Whabbear - Have fun in Arizona. Will you drive South and see Zona?

    Have a great weekend all owls everywhere.

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  30. Tinka...

    The Saanich Fair??

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  31. Hi Guys!

    Thank you for all the comments on the blog..I'm glad you liked the pics as much as I did! Mr Z said that there is a guy at work that uses the tape cup holder..LOL!

    I better get to bed..I hope everyone is dreaming sweet dreams and that you all have a safe and fun Labor Day weekend!

    G'night!!

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