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Saturday, May 26, 2012

Dictionary

by Sac Barb

These definitions fit so well, they should be in a dictionary:




ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends
and is now growing in the middle.


BEAUTY PARLOR:
 
A place where women curl up and dye.


CHICKENS:
 
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.


COMMITTEE:
 
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.


DUST:
 
Mud with the juice squeezed out.


EGOTIST:
 
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.


HANDKERCHIEF:
 
Cold Storage.


INFLATION:
 
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.


MOSQUITO:
 
An insect that makes you like flies better.


RAISIN:
 
A grape with a sunburn.


SECRET:
 
Something you tell to one person at a time.


SKELETON:
 
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.


TOOTHACHE:
 
The pain that drives you to extraction.


TOMORROW:
 
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.


YAWN:
 
An honest opinion openly expressed.



And MY Personal Favorite!

WRINKLES:
 
Something other people have,
Similar to my character lines.






14 comments:

Zona said...

Good Morning!!

BARB: Ok..love 'Tomorrow'..so true..and 'Chicken' is kinda icky..lol..they were all funny tho..thanks for the smiles this morning!

J/LIN: I was just checking in 51 to read comments from after I wrote earlier this morning and I realized that even with the limited amount of posts..I somehow missed saying HI to you. I'm sorry about that..as anyone will attest..sometimes I'm just a dork. I hope you still saved some chips for me... :)

Zona said...

I went to sleep way too late..and I'm up too early. My sister is coming over today for dinner..baby back ribs..corn on the cob and cucumber tomato salad...there's something else too..but I can't remember what it is...

It's only going to be in the 80s so it should be a nice day..It'll be an even better day if I can remember what that other menu item is..sheesh..

Oh..and I finally tried Arizona Ice Tea's Arnold Palmer lite..yummmmmy..so good!!

Going to go check my farms..poor chickens..lol..

Have a good day everyone! :)

Zona said...

BARB: Oh my..re-read the list after a few more sips of DP.. DUST..LOL!!! :D

Lynn D said...

Morning glories!

I think I am a raising. lol

I hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend.

We have sunshine and I am going to do laundry and paint and relax. We will see if any of that really happens. :)

Waving at everyone!

Just_Lin said...

Zona Congrats on being the prettiest on this fine Saturday. No offense taken in A51. I will always share my chips with you. We are also having barbequed baby back ribs and corn on the cob for dinner. I may make baked potatoes, too, or salad, or both. It's not looking very inviting outside right now; overcast, cool and breezy.

Just_Lin said...

LynnD You are a raising (like bread dough) or you are a raisin? Funny picture in my mind. LOL

Just_Lin said...

SacBarb I've been involved with some of those committees. I bet you have, too.

sacBarb said...

J/L, Most definitely. Remember I worked in government.

I most identify with the last one. I have MANY character lines. However, I also must have become an adult at 10 years old, because I stopped growing at both ends at at that age and I am growing in the middle now.

Zona, I thought you would like the Dust definition. BTW, you are beautious today, well everyday really, but especially today.

Lynn, I hope you get to your painting today.

Dianne/Denver said...

Area 51 SacBarb---yes, they gave me an antiviral pill for the shingles. They said it really needed to be taken earlier but might help. I take it religiously

I enjoyed your blog today, Barb. I like the dust one too. They r all funny. Thanks for sending it in for us.

Zona--u r beautiful this fine Memorial Day Saturday. The food u r missing is your beans and fruit and you also gave rolls. Remember?

JL---your dinner sounds yummy too. Too bad your weather won't cooperate. My daughter is bringing us dinner tonight so that will be nice and nice to visit too

Lynn--hope u get to paint and relax today. I think that's what weekends r made for so enjoy.

Where us Michael? I hope he is feeling okay and not any sicker.

I have some good news for once and I'm quietly saying it as I don't want to jinx it---Louis is feeling better today. I think the muscle relaxers have made a big difference.

Zona said...

DI: Thank you!! I remembered the fruit and the rolls..forgot all about the baked beans! I set the can on the counter so I wouldn't forget again! :D

*whispering with great enthusiasm* Yay Louis! :)

LYNN: I can't wait to see some of your paintings! Btw..you got the order wrong..it should have been relax..paint and THEN laundry..ijs.. ;D

J/LIN: Omg..overcast, cool and breezy sounds like heaven to me! We have the doors and windows open..it's 83* and just beautiful outside..love it! Enjoy your dinner..it sounds delish.. :D Thanks for the chips!!

BARB: I have a new theory..I think when I dust it goes up my nose..turns into mud..ewww..and then somehow short circuits my brain cells through my sinuses..that's why I can't remember anything..whattya think? No? Well..that's my story and I'm stickin' to it..so no more dusting for me!! :D

I feel better already!!

♫Red Solo cup♫

Dianne/Denver said...

Zona---sounds like u r in the party mood. You have your red solo cup so "proceed to,party". Whew, glad I remembered the beans. My tummy is growling but Tammy is coming over and bringing dinner---yum and nice to visit. Enjoy your BBQ and have a swig for mevoutbof the red solo cup (I don't know how to make musical notes)

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Praise the Lord! Louis (and you) are finally getting a respite from his back pain.

Dianne/Denver said...

Looks like I don't knowhowto type either

Just_Lin said...

Dianne How was dinner? It was nice of your daughter to bring dinner to you and Louis. Does she cook?