by Mary
During a woman's medical examination, her British
doctor
says,
"Your heart, lungs, pulse and blood pressure are all fine. Now let me see the part that gets you ladies into all kinds of trouble."
The lady starts taking off her undies but is interrupted by the doctor.
"No! No! Leave your knickers on! Just stick out your tongue!"
54 comments:
LOL Mary. Thanks for the laugh.
Helooooo. Where is everyone?
I'm here ...I wrote to you for the last entry in Area 51 last night too.
Nice cool day today in the 70's. It was very hot yesterday so it was a nice September day. I love fall.
Not much new here today. Had another dr appt. excited for tomorrow....no dr appt. just a nice lunch.
Here I am! Better late than never, right? It was a big day for me. I managed to put on makeup using my left hand and even managed to put on a bra. No easy task!!! My friend, Jane, took me to my hair appointment (nice to have my hair looking good today) and then took me to run a couple of errands.
Tomorrow I have Safeway delivering more groceries. It will be my third time having them do that and so far all the deliveries have been at no charge. This service has been a blessing as I didn't want to ask my friend to do major shopping for me, especially now when she has her hands full readying her house to put it on the market.
So sad about Joan Rivers.
It is sad about Joan Rivers. I always enjoyed her. There is just too much sadness going on.
Wow...you got your bra on..big day. Great service that Safeway doesn't charge for the delivery service. I'm sure your friend wouldn't mind.
One on my very best friends left for Texas last night. We went to dinner and said our good byes. It was very sad and I'll miss her so much after 22 years. I do not like change.
20/20 Friday night is a Joan Rivers special.
Ok, time for sleep. Night
Dianne - I'm terrible at final goodbyes. I sob like an idiot.
Safeway does normally charge for deliveries except for the first one. So far, though, I've been offered free deliveries plus 8 free bananas if I order by a certain date (I did) and free delivery plus $5 off if I order by a certain date (getting that delivery today). It's been working out well for me. I gave some of the bananas to my neighbors as 8 was too much for just me.
Happy Saturday. Are you all having a nice weekend? I am just hanging around the house, not doing much of anything. Maybe I'll go take a nap.
I broke down and watered the back yard. It's starting to look like the Sahara back there. Now waiting for pizza to be delivered.
J/L, My lawn is almost totally brown. Something is wrong with my sprinklers and they are not popping up, so when they do go on, only about 3-4 inches get watered. My Gardner doesn't know what is wrong. He has tried several things to fix them, and none have worked.
It sounds to me like you aren't getting enough water pressure to make the sprinkler heads rise. My guess is that there is a leak in the line underground somewhere between the water source and the sprinkler heads.
J/L, That's what my gardener thought, too, but they pop up when we put them on manually, they just don't go up when they go on with the timer. He put a new valve in and fixed a couple of other things, but they still don't pop up unless we turn them on manually, which is how I am watering now. I didn't realize this was happening until I noticed the lawn turning brown. He is going to talk to a friend of his that maintains the lawn for one of the country clubs in Sac.
MARY - Hilarious!!
SLIN - Good for you. You'll be a pro in no time. The bra was the hardest for me. God bless my son Tim. He helped me with that task until I found a way to do it myself!
BARB - Having a great weekend! Spent an awesome day yesterday with Sam. I treated her to her first mani and eyebrow wax. We also had a lovely late lunch next to the lake at Christy's Landing. This morning I'm meeting a friend (got to know her at Kwik Trip) for an early lunch. TINA and I helped her last year when her hubby had a medical emergency and couldn't fly to Arizona on the date their tickets were originally scheduled for. She is a sweetheart of a gal. We've been wanting to get together all summer, but her MIL has had some major health issues, so they've been busy running to Kenosha where she lives all summer. Figured out last winter that she knows MEK out in Arizona. Small world!
DIANNE - Goodbyes are hard. Well, you know me....a puddle of tears. Looking forward to the Broncos game tonight!! Go team!!
BARB IN COviaWA - Really enjoying the pics from your trip!! Keep 'em coming!
Yea Broncos...we won!!!! Always fun to win the first game of the season especially at home.
Louis and I cleaned out the pantry yesterday. It looks so nice and is about empty. We got six bags out of there. Lots of expired cans since I haven't been cooking for awhile. Now I have to convince myself not to replace anything. It took about an hour and a half with both of us doing it. Today I went thru spices. I think I've had them since first husband...all in the trash.
Jodi, sounds like you had a nice weekend. Mother-daughter day is always special. Hope you enjoyed your lunch today.
Barb, do you have to water all year there? I didn't know since you have nice weather. Are you feeling all the way better now? I hope so.
JL, sounds like you are making progress. How much longer in the sling? Are you still in quite a bit of pain? Safeway sure must like you.
This week I'm going to lunch Tuesday with a girl I reconnected with at my reunion. It should be fun.
I broke a tooth in half yesterday. It's the one way in back. It hasn't fallen out yet so I'm hoping it hangs on until I can get to the dentist. I feel like I spend half my life at drs and the dentist lately.
I had the locks change at my daughters house and the old boyfriend just found out today. He has moved to Wyoming but wants to come get his other things this week. My ex SIL is going to be the one there when he comes. We are all uncomfortable around him.
Ok, that's it. JL, careful with those tassels with that shoulder.
Hi gals! I don't know where the week went! I have been busy, but not sure with what lol!
Jim and I went to a Journey concert at the casino. It was an out door event. Good thing we had good weather! You never know here in Mich! Jim was not happy when the first song came on and everyone stood up and never sat down the whole night lol! He left after about 4 songs. He went back inside to gamble.
I left when they got close to the end so I wouldn't get trampled! It was a long walk back inside. I almost made it until I realized I left my good rain coat on my chair!! It was hell trying to get back, walking upstream in the crowd! Some how I found it!
Justlin , I am so glad you are able to do more with your hurt arm. "Doing the bra" is a biggie lol!
SacBarb,good luck with your lawn do-ha-ma-giggy! Our grass has been watered by Mother Nature a little more than we needed! I sure hope our up coming winter is not as "moist!"
Dianne!! Your Broncs won! Yay!!!
Sorry your friend is leaving. I hate change too. Will she be on FB?
Hodi!! How fun doing the "girl thing" with your daughter! Some how I can't see any of my sons enjoying the mani pedi thing with me lol!!
Have a great week everyone!!
Waving at Barb in what-ever-state-you-are-in~~~
DIANNE - Congrats on the win! We had a tough time on Thursday night. Lunch was so much fun! Patti and Mike are a fun couple and was gracious enough to treat me! I hope your tooth "hangs in there" til your appt!
MARY - Sounds like a fun concert! Love Journey! It was definitely a glorious weekend here weather wise. Not so much by the end of the week. By Friday we might not even reach 60*....ugh!
20!
Have a great day HOoters ♥
Hey, HOoters! Big day today. Got my bra on and Jane took me to my appointment with orthopedic doctor and follow-up x-rays. Doctor said I am healing well and gave me exercises to do to get my arm back into full operational mode. The exercises will not feel good at first but eventually will get better and easier until full range of motion is achieved. I took Jane out for a nice lunch as a thank you for her help. Funny, but that little outing kind of wiped me out.
Good news!!! Tim got a job! He is going to be washing dishes at the restaurant/bar I had lunch at yesterday. And he starts tomorrow!! Will probably be doing some prep work, too. So excited!!
SLIN - Sounds like good news at your appt. Be a good girl now and do those exercises! I bet it felt good to get out of the house, even though you feel wiped out.
HOdi - Yes, it was nice to be out and about today. One of these days soon, I better go outside and start my car up.
Congrats to Tim on being employed.
J/L, it will help you big time to do the exercises. Each time you do them, they should get easier.. Are you going to have physical therapy at Kaiser, too?
Jodi, congrats to Tim on getting a job.. Is he interested in cooking? This may be a good opportunity for him to learn..
Barb - I convinced ortho doctor that there was no need for me to see physical therapist right now since they would just tell me to do the same exercises at home that he just did. I will have a follow up appointment with PT in a 2-3 weeks to make sure I'm coming along okay.
SLIN - Good plan. You're right on the whole PT thing.
BARB - It's not so much that he's interested in cooking, it's just that he has experience and it is close to home. He will be using Paul's bike to get to work until he can afford to buy a friend's car.
Best get prettied up for work. It's gonna be a long day. 9 hour shift followed by our shift leader meeting. Ugh!!!
Hi Everyone...it's been a yucky day as far as I'm concerned. Started out early going to dr for a fasting blood draw. Had another dr appt at 2:30 and dental at 5:00. My broken crown ended up being a cracked tooth underneath all the way in the back. Had it pulled after tons of shots as they were not working. She finally put a shot right into the tooth...that was charming. $2000 later after a bone graft, membrane cover (whatever that is) a extraction I'm still in pain. Yup, a really fun day. Can you tell I'm on a poor me jag? I'm just so over all these drs and now dentist again.
Jodi, I'm so glad Tim found a job. Now he can earn money to get a car. He's learning. Exciting for him too. They have him starting quick, don't they?
JL, so glad to hear you got out of the house. Sounds like you are finally on the road to recovery. It always feels good to get out but funny how quick we tire. Maybe your friend could come and take you out again soon. Do those exercises!!
Mary, I don't like those concerts where they stand. I usually sit in handicap and they are pretty good seats off to the side.
Barb, you didn't answer me on how you were feeling now or about your sprinklers? Are you ready for summer to be over? I sure am.
Dianne - I feel so sorry for you. I hope you are not in such pain today. Dental problems are the worst. I never heard of a bone graft and membrane cover after an extraction. Are they preparing you for an implant?
Mary - My husband (also a Jim) was 17 years older than me and took me to see the Rolling Stones at the MGM Grand in 2005. He wore earplugs through the whole thing. LOL
DIANNE - Knock that shit off!! Just kidding. ...hope you aren't in as much pain today.
Well, I picked Jake up from practice, and had to talk to the trainer. His left knee is swollen on both sides. She seems to think there might be a chance that he has a torn ACL. I have to make an appointment with a sports medicine doc to figure out what is going on. He's sidelined until we know for sure.
Good grief, I guess the medical field is getting richer while we are getting poorer lol!
Dianne that is a lot of money to make you miserable! They should be paying you! I hope you heal real soon!
Jodi,yay, for Tim and :( for Jake. I hope he isn't side lined for long! You sure are one busy Mama with your job and watching over your family.
JL, How funny!! Our hubbies take us, but don'r promise to enjoy lol!!!
SacBarb, are you back to 100% healthy? I hope so.
Today was my second day of taking long walks. I take short ones with my dog, bring her in and redo the route only faster and a little further. I am keeping track on my iphone on the "Run keeper" app. It keeps me honest lol!So far I have gone 1.5 miles in 2 days. Shoot, I used to run 4 miles a day! Now I can barely walk lol!
HOdi - Oh, geez. I hope Jake's knee heals up soon. He's had his share of injuries, hasn't he?
Mary - I was just grateful my Jim was willing to pay big bucks to do something he had no interest in but he knew it was a thrill for me. Besides, even with his earplugs in place, the concert was so loud he could still hear it just fine. LOL
I drove my car today for the first time in 3 weeks. I just took two very short trips; one to the local shopping center and one to a nearby restaurant to meet my friends for dinner. I only had to drive on residential streets and one boulevard. I have very limited use of my right arm at this point so it's basically one-handed driving.
I was a good girl and did all my arm exercises today.
Dianne, I am feeling much better, but I still tire easily. My sprinklers are still not popping up with the timer. I have been turning them on manually and setting an alarm on my phone for 15 minutes so I don't forget to turn them off. My gardener is coming over on Thursday to try to fix them. He has already replaced a few parts, so this time he's going to replace a few more. I sure hope it works this time.
I'm so sorry you have to go through all that dental stuff again. I had a toothache again and I went to the dentist yesterday to have it checked out. I was sure I was going to have to get another root canal, but it turned out to be a broken filling and it can be repaired. He took an x-ray to be sure there was no abscess.
J/L, It's important to keep up with your exercises so you don't lose muscle and you can get your range of motion back. I'm glad you have ventured out in your car. Maybe it will start getting easier to drive soon.
Jodi, So sorry to hear that Jake has another injury. I hope he didn't tear his ACL, because that takes a LONG time to heal. Todd tore his ACL in his Junior year, playing football. He was on the injured list for six months until they finally decided it wasn't healing and they had to do surgery to reconstruct the ACL. That was almost a year of recovery so he couldn't play football in his senior year either. The coach let him be the statistician for the team so he could be on the field during the games. He didn't know how happy I was that he wasn't playing. I was so afraid if he played football again, he would get hurt again. I don't know how those pros get back to playing so quickly.
Mary, good for you that you're taking walks. I love to walk, but I just can't do that much anymore. Some days I can walk a few blocks and other days I can't get past two blocks without pain in my hip. When I do walk, however far I go, I have to make sure I can get back. LOL
MARY - I've gotten more walking in now that Sam is using my car for work. I guess the good thing is it has made me want to talk more! I've been trying to walk in the afternoon, too! Keep moving lady!
SLIN - I was able to get him in at 7 am tomorrow morning at the Sports Medicine clinic. Praying he won't need surgery.
BARB - That is what I've heard and researched. He may need to cut it back to only a couple of sports a year. I'm glad he had the mind to talk the trainer about his knee. I know he probably would've just "muscled thru" for God knows how long.
HOdi - Walking has made you want to talk more? LOL
SLIN - lol! Walk, talk....whatever!
50!!!
Heading in an hour early this morning, so I can take off at 6. Jake has an appointment with a sports medicine doc at 7. Thankfully my boss could make that work for us.
Jodi, I hope the news from the Sports Med Doc is good!.
BARB - Jump ahead!!! There was a new blog posted.
BARB - P.s. Thank you ♥
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