by Dianne
An Irish farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company. In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy.
'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor.
Paddy responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I'd just loaded my fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da... '
'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?'
Paddy said, 'Well, I'd just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin' down da road.... '
The solicitor interrupted again and said,'Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.'
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Paddy's answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite cow, Bessie'.Paddy thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav'rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin' her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side.I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin' and groanin'. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.
Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin' and groanin' too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.
Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, 'How are you feelin?'
'Now wot da fock would you say?'
27 comments:
Dianne, LOL, thanks for the laugh. It was much needed.
I was going to go to my monthly lunch with my friends today, but awoke to news that my SIL Shirley had passed.I thought it best to keep an eye on Jim, besides I was feeling too sad to join them. Last night it was decided to remove her tubes. If she did well, they were going to move her to a hospice facility. She passed around midnight with her husband and kids with her. I am glad she is no longer struggling. I had to tell Jim after he woke up. Syrjala's are not good at showing grief or emotions, so it's hard to tell how he is doing.
Mary May condolences to you and the family on the loss of your SIL. I'm thankful her she was able to be surrounded by her kids and family and that the tubes were out. I think we know how she felt about those tubes by the words she said to the nurse the other day. (((HUGS)))
Mary, I’m very sorry about your SIL. So glad her family as with her at her passing. Hugs to you and Jim
Mary, I am so sorry about Shirley. I saw the lovely picture of the both of you on FB. I will pray that you and the family can find comfort in your memories. Big (((HUGS))) for you and Jim. ❤️
JL...yea, you won your game today. It was very exciting for you all. Interesting that Kyle Shanahans dad is there and he used to coach your GM John Lynch. I will be cheering for just because of your staff! I really hope you get to the super bowl and it’s so fun in the city when you are going. I remember those exciting times!
I’m still having chest pains but went to lots of drs last week and no one seems to know what it is now. I’m done with prednisone tmrw and it didn’t do anything for me. Pain dr put me on nerve pill for my back to see if that will help that issue. I don’t know which thing to groan about when I move. Oh well, you just learn to live with it and accommodate yourself.
Mary, hows Jim doing? I know you said his family don’t show their emotions much. Hope you and family are doing ok as I am praying for your family.
Barb, do you cheer for 49ers since you live in California or are you strictly a Raider fan? Your state has so many football teams.
I’ve been ambitious the last two days. I organized my whole office yesterday. Then Louis got a couple of totes and I ventured downstairs and sorted cal the bags of wrapping things. I got About five bags neatly into two totes with room to spare. If I haven’t used it..I dumped it. Then Louis and I worked on his closet downstairs. oh boy, did I go through it....lots of trash and donations bags. I’m not a saver so once I have energy I can get get through things. I’m working on my Christmas gifts today and room.
Ok...back to work.
Well, I’m out and about nudging!
I think my heart pain is easing up some today. It still hurts if I lift my arm but otherwise it’s not as strong of a pain anymore. Now...if I could just get my back in order, I’d be a happy camper.
I got all my rooms organized this weekend and started trying tops on for trip tonight. I usually do it when I’m packing and it’s too stressful especially if they don’t fit. I’ve gained some pounds and I’m afraid there are some just a little tight across my gut!
Seems like two of our owls are busy watching the Bachelor right now. I just finished watching America’s Got Talent...the. Champions. dee you all soon.
SavBarb, thanks for the hugs 🤗
That picture was taken in Seattle at my GR nieces wedding. , Shirley’s Granddaughter. Fun times.
Dianne, Jim has been pretty quiet. I can tell he has had a few crying spells when he comes in from a drive or smoking. Tonight was the visitation and tomorrow is the funeral. Family from Boston to Seattle.
Will post again in a couple days.
I guess i changed your name Barb lol!
Dianne Thanks for the nudge. You have been busy with all your organizing. I'm surprised you were able to do so much with your pain still being there. I'm glad it has at least gotten better than it was. That's at least a step in the right direction.
I forget what trip you are going on now. It seems like you are always either packing or unpacking. I don't know when or if I will be going on any more trips. My daughter was my traveling partner and now that she lives in Oregon, she doesn't yet have anyone who she would trust to take care of her dogs, plus there is the cost of travel and of dog sitting. Besides, I need time to get my credit card paid down more. My daughter probably has the same issue what with her moving costs, etc.
Are you going to be around to help cheer the 49ers on to victory this weekend? I'll be watching for sure.
Mary That was a very nice picture of you and Shirley that you posted on FB. She looks like she was a lovely person. I'll be thinking of you and your family today. (((Hugs)))
On a totally different note.... I'm watching my daughter's two dogs while she is in Phoenix on business. We've had quite a lot of rain so there's plenty of muddy ground around which they all seem to have to walk in. This requires me to bend over and wipe their paws before I can let them come back inside. They don't actually stay outside. They just do their business and walk around a little checking for squirrels so the wiping of the paws happens numerous times during the day. My back is not very happy about this but the first thing they do when coming back in is to jump up on the sofas or the beds. Such spoiled dogs!
Barb All that drama on the Bachelor and Hannah B. didn't stay, after all. I wonder if that was their decision or if the production people reminded Peter that he signed a contract to do the show and not as someone who already had a girlfriend.
I've enjoyed having my daughter here. It's also given her time to spend time with her girlfriends while she's in California. She hasn't really made friends in Oregon, with the exception of a couple she met while they were all with their dogs at the dog park. She works from home all day so doesn't even have co-workers to socialize with. The one thing she does every single day, though, is take the dogs to the dog park. When she's here, she takes them and my dog on long walks daily in areas where they can be off-leash. I wish I was able to do as much walking as she does. My sciatica makes it miserable. I'm sure significant weight loss would improve that. If only....
Oh, I forgot to mention that my daughter didn't like my old vacuum so she bought me a new one. She should come and visit more often. LOL
Hello Everyone. Here I am. Dianne gave me a nidge on Monday night and I promised to post after the Bachelor was over, but I got distracted by Chad and then I had to go to bed. Monday I had a hair appointment which I struggled to get to because my fibromyalgia decided to flare. I might as well have skipped the hair appointment, because I spent most of the rest of Monday and Tuesday in bed. I have tried so many different pain remedies that seem to help others with the same malady, but I have gotten no relief.
Dianne, My son got Raiders season tickets so I will still be cheering for them. I am so envious that you are getting so much organizing done. I am badly in need of cleaning out the spare bedroom, which became a junk room after Arch moved to his Mom’s. It’s so easy to just put crap into that room and close the door.
Mary, I am so, so, sorry about Shirley. I hate that, as we get older, that we lose key people in our lives. It never gets easier. I hope You and Jim are both doing well.
J/L, Is Liz happy that she moved? It always takes a while to meet people and make new friends in a new area, but in her case, since she works from home, it’s probably even more difficult. I’m not one to strike up a conversation with strangers, so I’m not sure how I would handle that situation.
Each new season of The Bachelor/Bachelorette seems to get more drama filled. I don’t know what Hannah B. was trying to accomplish by turning up at the house and inserting herself in the picture. As you said, Peter signed a contract and committed to do the show, as she should well know. No matter how he still feels about her, there would be severe consequences if he decided not to do it, at that point. And if she were to stay, the whole show would be a sham, not to mention how the other women would handle it! I guess it’s a sham anyway, but it is entertaining.
J/L, I hate this time of year! So messy! I keep towels and rugs by the door for Queenie (Lab). Zoie, I just pick up and easily wipe her paws. The Lab, not so easy lol! I wish we had a dog park near by. I'm not sure I would feel comfortable unleashing Zoie, especially if there are big dogs around.
Dianne, I miss traveling. With Jim & Shirley being ill, we really didn't dare make any travel plans. I too have to clean up my CC, LOL!
I really want to take another cruise! I don't think I will travel abroad anymore. Too much going on in this crazy world! I am so glad your heart pain has subsided.
SacBarb, I Googled fibromyalgia. I feel so bad for you! Please take care of yourself!
I'll be praying for you to find something that will give you relief!
Our power was out for almost 12 hrs. It got pretty cold in here, but glad it didn't last longer!
We are expecting a nasty snow storm this week end. Sure hope we keep our power!
Jim is doing ok. We got back from the funeral Tues. about 2:00 and he went to the Casino! I will never understand his type of grieving! The day after she died he went to the Casino! I told him to wait at least a week if I pass away lol! All sad, but funny!
Hi...happy weekend everyone. We are having pretty decent weather this weekend in the high 40’s but windy yesterday. Looks like a fairly nice week ahead until near the end. Went to see movie Richard Jewell today. It was a pretty interesting movie. I had forgotten the details of what had happened. I think I’ll go see just mercy with Jamie Fox on Monday as Barb is off. I’ve been trying on clothes for our trip to be sure they still fit from summer and thank goodness they do. We leave for Hawaii cruise on Feb 11-27. It’s the same as last year but except we have different excursions this time although, we are doing the sunset cruise again. Tammy goes back to work full time next week. She can drive as broken bones in left leg. She has to have someone help her in and out of the car and ems been going over to be sure she gets down the garage steps.
JL....tmrw is your big game. Good luck. I’ll be cheering for you loud. I’ll bet your city is excited! I think you have a good chance to win. Maybe your daughter could bring her dogs there sometime and you could share a dog sitter for a trip. It doesn’t sound fun wiping all those paws especially with your back issues. I feel for you with this pain! Mine is a tiny bit better. I still walk like I’m 100. Nice to get a new vacuum and it’s not even a holiday!
Barb, you and JL are very involved in your show. I’m kind of like that with the Voice and AGT. How are you feeling. Did you find some relief from your pain. I hope so. My back pain dr put me on gabapentin and increased it to 900 mg at night. Makes me sleep at least. Have you been on that med? I’m still organizing a little each day or so. I’m back on prednisone and dr says it gives me energy. I’m not so sure about that but I’ll take what I’m an get. I really hope you’re feeling better.
Mary, I have no interest to travel abroad either. I guess if I was given or won a trip I’d go! You made me chuckle telling jim to wait a day to go to casino when you die. I guess everyone grieves in their own way. Maybe it just helps to be on his own for the moment. It sounds like there is a lot of bad weather in your part of the country. The news showing Chicago weather looked really bad. I hope you didn’t lose power again. It seems like you lose power a lot.
Well, enough from me. , looking forward to hearing from you all.
Dianne, I have never taken gabapentin. My primary doctor told me Kaiser doesn’t treat fibromyalgia, so she hasn’t prescribed anything. She told me I can take 1500 mg of Tylenol every 12 hours. I take it at night and it helps a little. I can ask the doc for meds and she’ll probably write a scrip for me, but most pain med has a lot of bad side affects and I don’t want to take them because of that. I’ll do some research on that med.
Mary, I agree that everyone grieves in their own way. Maybe Jim wants to be in a crowd so he isn’t alone with his thoughts. I am so glad I don’t live in a place as cold as MI. Do you have a fireplace to warm up any part of your house when the power it out? I have lost power a few times when we’ve had strong winds and once when someone drove into a power pole. Once it was out for three days, but that time I went to my son’s house. I always keep Presto logs for the fireplace, just in case.
J/L, congratz on your 49ers win today. We watched the game and I was hoping it would be a closer score.
The Jennifers and I went to see Little Women yesterday and we really liked it. I read the book when I was in 7th or 8th grade and the movie inspired me to read it again. There are details I have forgotten.
Barb, gabapentin is for nerve issues in the back but not an actual pain pill. I go to pain dr tmrw so will see what he has to say. I feel like it’s a bit better but don’t know if that’s due to prednisone or nerve pills. I don’t know if it would help your situation or not. Let me know what you think. I’d kind of like to see Little Women. We went to see Just Mercy with Jamie Foxx today. It’s a true story and very good. We saw a couple of good movies this weekend.
Knock on wood....we haven’t had much snow in the last few weeks. Hope it doesn’t come when it’s time to leave on our trip!
JL, I think,the super bowl should be a good game. I liked it yesterday when your coach’s dad gave him the trophy since he was our coach! Very touching.
Mary, maybe our teams will be in super bowl ne to year!
Dianne I expect the Super Bowl game will be a tougher one to win for the 49ers so I hope you will be cheering for them extra hard. I'm sure you cheers helped them beat the Packers.
I've heard very good things about Just Mercy. I think I would enjoy Little Women, too. I don't know when I will get to the theater again. I usually go when my friends John and Jane are also interested in seeing the same movie. I have gone to matinees by myself on occasion, though. I would like to get caught up on some of the movies that are nominated for an Oscar. Some of them are available for me to watch from home so I need to get on top of that. Besides have HBO and Showtime, I also have Amazon Prime. When my daughter was here, she got me signed onto her Netflix account and also got me on her BFF's Hulu account. I have so many things to watch now that it will require a lot of time. Not that I'm doing anything else of importance.... LOL
Barb I hope your fibromyalgia subsides soon. I'm having painful muscles in my upper left arm and the only reason I can think of is that I have healing tennis elbow in my right arm and I baby it by doing the heavy lifting of grocery bags with my left arm. Sometimes the bags are really heavy and I think it's the motion of flinging them up and onto the kitchen counter that is straining those muscles. This probably wouldn't have happened 20 years ago, maybe even 10 years ago. Aging sucks and I am getting more out of shape every day.
Speaking of the grocery store, I went shopping today and had in mind to make Chicken Piccata tonight for dinner. I double checked my shopping list before going to check out and found that I forgot to pick up chicken broth. So I go over to the soup section of Safeway and see that they are having a sale on Progresso soups of buy 2, get 4 free. Well, I couldn't pass that up and it took me a little while to decide which 6 soups to get. By the time I was done, I had totally forgotten about the chicken broth. I didn't remember it until I was home and preparing to make dinner. Ugh! So tonight's dinner was grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup. I'll have to go back to the store for the broth tomorrow.
Mary Well things were starting to dry up a little around here but I guess we have more rain coming tomorrow. I have a towel by the back door to wipe my dog's paws with.
Is your heating and appliances all electric? I have both electric and gas here. My heating is gas so at least I can be warm if the electricity goes out. Also, my stove top is also gas so I can light the burners with a flame if need be. I find I can be comfortable on the sofa with a throw over me, rather than cranking up the thermostat. But then again, it doesn't snow here so we don't get anywhere near as cold as you do.
Being a stoic Fin, Jim probably needed to go to the casino so he could be distracted and not feel the emotions he must have regarding the loss of his sister. I expect you are grieving, too. (((HUGS)))
If I could take another European cruise, I would. I have no qualms about going overseas.
JustLin, I am always up for a cruise...anywhere lol!
Our whole house is electric. The only fireplace is in the basement family/karaoke room, which we don't heat in the winter.
Jim is doing better. You are right, he just needed to get away by himself.
I have Amazon Prime. I like watching old movies like Charlie Chan. I have been waiting for Elton Johns latest movie to be available...free.
I notice my shoulders hurting after bringing in groceries. Today I bought a 32 bottle case of water. I leave it in my Jeep and open the pkg and bring in the bottles about 12 @ a time. Jim & Matt have back trouble too, so I always try to spare them ...crazy me eh?
Barb, Our whole house is electric. I have been nagging Jim into buying a full house generator. A few of our friends and neighbors have it and love it! It kicks in as soon as power goes out.It is very expensive, but like I keep telling Jim, "we ain't getting any younger" and losing heat in the winter and no ac in the summer is hard on us
I hope you are taking care of yourself!
Dianne, we have sung the "maybe next year song" for a long time lol!
We got a lot of snow last week. We are now getting rain. Our driveway is an icy, slippery mess! I sure hope you are feeling better. You may have to move to a warmer climate to ease your pain!
Wednesday was our 41st wedding anniversary. We have been together for 46 yrs.It's a hard day to celebrate, my oldest sister died on this day, but on a good note, my Niece Jaimie was born on this day.
We will be going out to dinner Sat. to celebrate.
Mary.....WOW 41 years is a long time. Happy Anniversary. Enjoy your dinner sat night. What kind of restaurant are you going to? I wont be moving....just dealing with it. It hurt in Texas too so don’t think that would make much difference. your weather has been worse than ours except for October here was terrible. We are having a very mild January. Hope it stays nice for us to fly to LA for cruise on the 11th
JL, I will be cheering extra hard for your team next week. Is your city going crazy with excitement? , I always like the hype. If you rush me some tassels...Ill be twirling them! Did you get your chicken piccata cooked? I’m for sure making potato soup Sunday or Monday. I always keep chicken broth as it lasts a long time. I’m busy eating low fat wheat thins right now. I guess I would do a Mediterranean cruise. How’s your shoulder feeling? I got a couple of new tops for the cruise...just what I didn’t need
Barb, did you look up the gabapentin? I think it’s helping a tiny bit. How are you feeling? I went to pain dr and primary this week too. They both feel like my heart pain is caused from arthritis in my neck that is radiating down my shoulder and Into my chest. It’s much better or he was going to give me a shoulder shot! Glad I didn’t have to do that this time. I feel like I’m always at a dr lately.
Had lunch with em and Tammy today. The restaurant is attached to her office but she still needs help over with scooter so em helped with getting her. She’s really in pain and trying to work full,time.
I was cleaning my dresser drawers last night and found a pretty box with $305 in it. I was hiding it from myself I guess. Nice surprise right before vacation and gambling.
Mary, Happy Anniversary. I hope you enjoyed your dinner out. I have seen generator commercials on TV and wondered how much they would cost. We have gas for heat, but it needs electricity to spark the pilot and run the fan. So, I am glad our fireplace is in the living room. I thought all houses in areas that get snow had multiple fireplaces. Guess I am wrong!
J/L, I LOL’d at your grocery story. I have done that so many times! I have gone to the store for just one thing and I get distracted and come home with bags of stuff I never intended to get, but without the one item I needed - more than once! I hate making multiple trips from the car to the house with groceries, so I try to carry everything at once. My arms suffer for it, too. I love that Chad always unloads the car now, and even puts most stuff away. I am a pampered woman!! By the way, tomato soup and grilled cheese sammy is one of my favorite meals.
Dianne, I did look up gabapentin and it does have a lot of common side effects and quite a few others, not as common. Fibromyalgia is caused from the nerve endings being near to the surface of the skin and causing pain. I will talk to my doctor about it.
I have put money away on occasion and forgotten about it. It’s always a nice surprise when I find it. When I was working, I didn’t like to take my purse when I went to lunch because it was big and heavy with work stuff, so I would just put money in my pocket. I usually forgot to take out the change and would find it the next time I wore that outfit or when I washed it. I never wash clothes without going through the pockets!
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