by Dianne
She wanted to serve her guests mushroom-smothered steak, but she had no mushrooms and no time to buy them.
Her husband suggested, "Why don't you go pick some of the mushrooms that are growing wild down by the stream?
"No --- some wild mushrooms are poisonous."
"Well, I see squirrels eating them and they're OK."
So she picked a bunch and washed, sliced and sautéed them for her dinner. Then she went out on the back porch and gave Spot, their dog, a double handful. Spot ate every bit.
All morning long, she watched the dog. The wild mushrooms hadn't affected him after a few hours, so she decided to use them.
The meal was a great success.
After everyone had finished, her daughter came in and whispered in her ear, "Mum, Spot is dead."
Trying to keep her head about her, she left the room as quickly as possible, called the doctor and told him what had happened.
The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I'll call for an ambulance and I'll be there as quickly as I can. We'll give everyone enemas and we'll pump out their stomachs and everything will be fine. Just keep them calm."
Before long they started to hear the sirens as the ambulance tore down the road. The Paramedics and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach.
Well after midnight, after the last one was done the doctor came out and said, "Everything will be okay now," and with that he left.
The hosts and the guests were all weak and knackered and were sitting around in the living room when the daughter came in and said to her mum..... "I can't believe that guy!"
"What guy?"
"You know --- the bastard who ran over Spot ---- he didn't even slow down."
Her husband suggested, "Why don't you go pick some of the mushrooms that are growing wild down by the stream?
"No --- some wild mushrooms are poisonous."
"Well, I see squirrels eating them and they're OK."
So she picked a bunch and washed, sliced and sautéed them for her dinner. Then she went out on the back porch and gave Spot, their dog, a double handful. Spot ate every bit.
All morning long, she watched the dog. The wild mushrooms hadn't affected him after a few hours, so she decided to use them.
The meal was a great success.
After everyone had finished, her daughter came in and whispered in her ear, "Mum, Spot is dead."
Trying to keep her head about her, she left the room as quickly as possible, called the doctor and told him what had happened.
The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I'll call for an ambulance and I'll be there as quickly as I can. We'll give everyone enemas and we'll pump out their stomachs and everything will be fine. Just keep them calm."
Before long they started to hear the sirens as the ambulance tore down the road. The Paramedics and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach.
Well after midnight, after the last one was done the doctor came out and said, "Everything will be okay now," and with that he left.
The hosts and the guests were all weak and knackered and were sitting around in the living room when the daughter came in and said to her mum..... "I can't believe that guy!"
"What guy?"
"You know --- the bastard who ran over Spot ---- he didn't even slow down."
10 comments:
Now I have to say, that was pretty funny! Sorry I’ve been off for so long. We had a nice trip and got home later afternoon Monday. The weather was perfect. Even humidity wasn’t bad. We went to all TTT shows ..that was five shows. We did a few other shows too. Since it’s fan week they do a different show for each show. There r a of of fans and buses come in too. We had a dinner Tuesday night and a luncheon on Thursday with the guys it’s very fun and they r very down to earth. Marcus…the blond and my boyfriend sat at r table. Sigh. We arrived in Salina the first night and as we drove into the parking lot for dinner and I asked for my walker . Louis said he didn’t bring my small one that I use every day. It was on his list. I couldn’t believe it and I was pissed. Earlier that day I tried to hook up my oxygen in the car while we were in colorado. The hook up didn’t work for my new oxygen. It was the old one. Good thing I don’t stay made long. It was the weekend so Sunday there was nothing open to see if I could either buy or rent for a week. No one had one. On monday I finally found one and we went to get it. It cost $283. Amazon was $84. No choice since we were traveling. We had a great ARBNB in Branson and it was handicap.. the owners were very nice. He came down to help us unload the car. He came back when we were leaving with two kids and loaded r car. I called r handyman’s son and he helped unload the car. He did a few other things for $50. It was so worth it. Ok here’s the other bad part. I slipped right off the bed the second day. I stopped before the floor. I could not get ahold of Louis and I was panicking he finally heard me and came and got me My arms, wrists, were purple and red bad! How embarrassing for the trip. Some thought I needed to go to er but didn’t. I’ll try and attach a picture. The bedding was very slippery and I just went down off it. Stupid . Ww did do a golf car ride and it was beautiful and different. Soooo, overall it was a good trip and we got help when needed.
Mary, how was the wedding and seeing your brother? I’m behind on everyone. JL, your dinners sound good and easy. Do u just stick it in microwave? And barb, what’s the latest with your sister? I think that’s my life now
Today is Louis’s bday. We went out for Chinese tonight. I’m having some mouth issues so can barely eat!
Hello everyone. I’m sorry I have been mia, but I have been so busy getting my sister ready to move and then actually moving her that I’ve been exhausted. I’m too old to be doing all this “work.” In preparation for her move, I took ALL her clothes, including underwear, to my house and washed them. Because her house smelled so bad, it transferred to her clothes and I didn’t want to bring that smell to the care home. Also, I am getting rid of about half of her clothes. She won’t be needing the real fancy ones, since she won’t be going to any fancy social affairs. I did keep a couple of outfits, in case we took. Her out to dinner, etc. She did even notice what was missing.
The house she is in is very nice. There are five other residents and all have their own room and bathroom. The staff is very nice. The owners are from Romania. Marie is doing very well there so far, although she has already complained about the food, which is funny to me because 10 minutes after the meal, she can’t remember what they had!
It takes us 40 minutes to get to the house. I looked at places closer to my house, but my area is a lot more expensive, so I had to let the budget dictate my choice. The places in my area run $5,000-$6000 per month for basic care, which is what she needs now. As her dementia progresses, and needs more personal care, the cost goes up. This place is $4000 per month for now. Now, we need to get her house in shape to sell it.
I am changing her doctors, who are now in downtown Sac, to a facility closer to where Marie is now. We still have to take her, but it won’t be such a long trip for her.
Dianne, What a trip! I am so sorry you "slipped" off your bed! Not funny, but wondered if you did it with a flare :) I am glad you weren't too hurt! Sounds like your time at Branson was fun anyway. Good!
SacBarb.Wow, you sure have been busy! I am so glad you were able to find a place and place her there. I remember when my Dad needed to be placed. Luckily we found a wonderful place run by Mennonites. It has since expanded to a large state of the art facility. I have friends staying there and they love it. I have been there and had lunch with them. Good home cooking. The rooms are incredible.
I have been busy too. I rode to Illinois to my Nieces wedding. Her Dad, my brother Joel flew in from New Mexico. We had a wonderful reunion. We all stayed in the same hotel, including Nieces with families and the Bride & Groom. We were able to meet in the breakfast area to say our goodbyes.
On our way back we stopped in Paw Paw MI were Raquel lives and got to hold her new baby! Made my trip even better!
I got my yearly flu shot yesterday. Not sure yet about the covid booster. I hate pumping my body with so much stuff. I may change my mind later.
All is well here at home. Dreading the shorter day-lite hrs and cold weather!
Zoie is back to her normal self. She still has one large scab that has not fallen off yet. It must have been a deep bite!
My garden is about finished. I will miss my daily tomatoes,zukes,and cukes. I have two pumpkins growing nicely and potatoes yet to dig up. Matthew has been bringing in the veggies as they come in.
He just told me he needs two doz. choc chip cookies for this coming Monday, so I will be busy doing that this week end.
Have a safe and restful week end all!!
Waving at JustLin & Seaside ~~~~~
Dianne I'm glad you had such a good time on your trip, even with a few mishaps. Maybe you need to double check the packing of those things most vital to you. The bright spots, like you said, is that you were always able to get assistance when you needed it.
No, the dinners I've ordered from Home Chef are not just microwave. Depending on the choices, there is a certain amount of actual cooking. I cooked one of the dinners last night and it was pretty tasty but I felt like it was more work than I want to do just for me. At least, I have leftovers tonight so that makes it easy...I'll reheat it in the microwave. I've had meals from them that I liked better and were less work. I'll be paying better attention to what I order in the future. This particular meal was rated as "Expert". I should have realized that translated to "more work". LOL I am finding the experience to be fun, though. I look forward to seeing the menu options for each upcoming week and making my choices.
Barb I'm so glad that you found a nice place for your sister. What a relief that must be for you. I expect they feed the residents wholesome meals and are probably a lot better for her than microwaveable meals that I think she was having while at home. I usually have a few microwaveable things in the freezer for convenience but I do know they are loaded with salt and that's not good for me.
There are things in my closet that could disappear and it would take a long time for me to even notice. I guess that should be a clue to me that it's time to move those things on.
After our double Bachelor shows last night, I stayed up way too late watching something on BritBox. After I was up a couple of hours today, I was feeling really crappy so I went back to bed and slept until almost 2:30. I felt much better then. I guess I'm not the nightowl I used to be.
Mary Good for you for getting your flu shot. I got mine a week ago and it made me feel rather lousy for a few days. I developed a large red area on my arm, a few inches below the injection site. I don't know why, but I often have some type of reaction to flu shots. I do much better with COVID shots. I will get the new version in a couple of weeks or so. I'm giving my arm and body time to recover from the flu shot. Then there is the RSV vaccine. I haven't made a decision about that one, yet. I'll probably end up getting it. I'm a believer in "Better safe than sorry".
What a wonderful weekend you had, first attending the wedding and then meeting your sweet new grandnephew. So sweet!
I'm glad your sweet Zoie is back to her old self. I sure miss my Ursula.
Barb, I watch a lot of BritBox. Mostly mysteries.I love Foreign movies.My smart tv has a lot of them.
I checked my arm, and no marking. I did feel groggy for a couple days, but this time a year it's normal for me lol!
I get so tired of cooking every day. I run out of ideas. The guys don't care as long as they are fed lol!
Today I made four batches of choc chip cookies. Jim would have a fit If I sent them all with Matthew, so I made extra :)
My Birthday isn't until Dec 16, and I got my license tab renewal today. Matthew's is the 4th of Dec. and he got his two weeks ago. They are not getting my money until late Nove lol!
Good hearing from all of you!
We need Seaside to check in. :(
Mary I think you got Barb and me mixed up again. LOL We both live in California but I'm taller. LOL
In my head I was writing to Justlin lol!!!
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