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Tuesday, July 8, 2008

“ My Mother would have killed me, and still will.”


by goldie

We were recently walking with our 24-year-old son in Chicago when a woman approached carrying several bags and getting her keys out. She stopped and attempted to open her building door. My son rushed over, held the door for her and picked up a bag she dropped. She said thank you, and as we walked away he said, “oh wasn’t that nice, she said thank you”. Then he said, “isn’t it sad that I think it is special when someone says thank you instead of expecting it?”

We went on to talk about manners in general and he said, “do you know how many times a day I say to other people “my mother would have killed me and still will if I acted like that!”

He said he was talking about adults, not children, and usually middle aged adults at that.

He is a flight attendant, the ones who take the abuse for the ticket prices and long lines. The one who you carp at about cramped seating, no food, bad food and general issues that are unpleasant to you about the airlines. He is also the one who will give all to save your ass in an emergency, who is trained in CPR and First Aid and can pretty much build you a shelter out of box of aluminum foil if you crash into that mountain top. But he loves his job anyway.

He says he is amazed at how people treat each other, the awful way they use manners and how many people live in their own “me world”. He has also had the other side of the spectrum too.

He recently had Brooke Shields as a passenger and said she is one of the nicest, most respectful people he has ever met. He has met lots of celebs, is not impressed per say with fame, just with their manners and treatment of others.

As we walked down the street to the restaurant we were going too, we all paid extra attention to the people we saw. We saw a young couple stop and help a mother navigate her child’s wagon across busy N. Clark St. We saw people honking and flipping off a delivery driver.

When we got to the restaurant there was a 15-minute wait. We said we would go to the bar – and immediately a young couple offered us their seats. We declined but chatted with them. We asked why they offered up their seats and the young man, in full tattoos, nose rings and spike hair said “that is how I was raised – my mom would slap me upside the head if I didn’t offer a lady my seat.” OMG- it was so surreal to hear him say that when we had just been discussing the subject. He was the perfect gentleman, he did is mom proud.

I guess the moral of the story is that the next time you are tempted to be rude to someone or talk with food in your mouth, spraying the people next to you – think about it.

If your mother “would kill me if I acted like that” then don’t.

Has someone done something really nice for you lately, like that young man did, without expecting anything in return??

135 comments:

  1. I'm trying to think if anyone has done anything nice for me lately.

    I just thought of something really cool.

    Last week when we were in St. Louis we happened to get lost trying to find the zoo.

    We pulled into the gas station and aske a man at the gas pump for directions.

    The man was soooooooo nice. He gave us great directions and even led us most of the way .

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  2. Goldie: My bro-in-law got his car washed yesterday, and treated the young girl at the check-in booth like a long lost friend. She, in turn, was as nice as she could be right back. Their interaction left me with a warm fuzzy!

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  3. My Mother always taught me to give up my seat to a lady, too. But isn't that a bit sexist? LOL!

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  4. I've missed you guys! Four days without internet access! Hope everybody had a great 4th of July weekend!

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  5. Good morning Whabbear & iteach! oops I should have done "ladies first lol!
    My brother-in-law always opens my sisters car door for her. I crack up because I always think he is going to let her drive when he heads to her side. I asked him why he still does that he said " My Father would roll over in his grave if I didn't".
    Mr Mary always opens my house door and lets me walk in. He says it's in case there is a burgler inside lol!
    I am up early because I have a hair appt. Not too smart for a gal who isn't a morning person lol! My hair dresser will try to perform her usual miracle! Later ...
    Gottah go

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  6. Morning Glories!

    Iteach got first again!!!!

    Morning Whabby!

    Goldie what a great blog and your son sounds divine!

    I have to think about the nice story first. Nothing comes to mind. I have run into some really rude people lately and totally agree about the living in their "me world". Makes me sad.

    I will be back in a bit.

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  7. Oooops Good Morning Mary you snuck in there! LOL

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  8. Mornin' Lynnd!
    I thought I better change my avatar, though it may be a "toilet" kinda morning of my hair turns out terrible lol!

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  9. Good Tuesday morning,Owls.Good morning to iteach, whabbear, mary/mi,lynn_d and to everyone who flies in later.

    Congrats on first and second iteach!

    Welcome back, Whabbear!

    Fabulous topic and blog, Goldie. I think manners might be a dying art and rudeness is on the rise. I have been thinking alot about this lately around the concept of thank you. I was raised that when someone did something for you, you must say thank you. It was the way you humbly showed others that you appreciated what they had done for you. You showed your appreciation by saying or writing a thank you when a gift was given or something was done for you. But now I am realizing that this may be a passing thing. I try to not expect a thank you and to do things selflessly but like your son Goldie, I think "wasn't that nice" when I do hear it.

    Something nice done for me....I was away for work for about two weeks recently and while I was gone UPS tried to deliver a package. There were UPS notices on my mailbox and on the door of my apartment. The lady who lives across the hall collected the notices so it wouldn't look so obvious that I was not home and called the UPS people and let them know I was away and asked them to hold on to the package until I got home. A neighbourly act that I greatly appreciated!

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  10. Morning Hooters!

    Congrats on 1st iteach

    lol@Mary's Mr. Mary

    Bear- I did reverse sexist once. Here is my act of kindness- I took the Van Gelder bus from Madison to Chicago Ohare (about 10 yrs ago)- a 3 1/2 hour trip. The bus was totally full by the time we stopped at the third pick up. An elderly couple, I would say in their late 70's early 80's got on. No seats. No one moved. Then a young man (college aged) got up and gave his seat to the lady. I waited, I waited, nadda, then I got up and gave my seat to the gentlemen.

    Both the college kid and I sat in the aisle on the floor together. We chatted and got to know each other some that day. It was one hell of an uncomfortable ride, but it helped to be talking and passing the time.

    When we got to Ohare the bus driver stood up and told everyone to sit down who was already standing, and he sounded none to happy. He announced that the elderly couple would be allowed off the bus first and the "couple" who gave up their seats would be next- he then said "the rest of you should be ashamed". I was in shock!!

    The elderly couple thanked us both so much, even offered to buy us lunch. We both declined, said our goodbyes and never saw each other again. But it was the proudest moment and the most appreciated I have ever felt in my life. It was just the right thing to do.

    Geez- that was a whole blog in itself!!

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  11. Good Morning Iteach, Whabbear,
    Mary, Lynn and VIG.

    Whabbear - It's so nice to see you again. I have really missed you.

    Iteach - Congrats on 1st.

    I will read the blog to see what you are all talking about.

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  12. lynn, thank you- my son is great, not divine. He has just been cuffed upside the head enough times when he was younger that some of it sank in :)

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  13. Good morning, Goldie, very nice blog and very nice son! You did a good job with him! And, it's obvious you were a great role model for him by your bus story.

    I think it's the greatest feeling to do something for someone else. I'm sad for the people who never realize that.

    When we moved to the south a couple of years ago my children were forced (in school) to say "sir" and "ma'am" (we just didn't do that up North) and I love it! It warms my heart when an adult talks to my kids and they say "yes, sir!"

    Good morning, iteach, whabbear (how was your trip?), mary/mi (good luck with your hair!), Lynn, VIG and Tinka!

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  14. From Area 51:

    Tina, I knew you would love that book! It's the only book I can think of that I just kept laughing out loud! And, yes, so wrong in some places! I haven't read his others but my friend has and said she enjoyed them but not as much as Lamb.

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  15. I was raised in a world where good manners were expected and it is still a habit for me. When I first got my Asian students in 1999 we were expected to show them how to take a bus to town and to school. It was my first time on a bus since I got my driver's license. I was amazed at the fact that children and young adults no longer gave up their seats for the elderly. When I was young all children gave up their seats for adults, men gave theirs to women, and everyone stood to let the elderly sit. The only time I ever sat (and it was a half hour drive) was if the bus was half empty. We didn't even think about it. It was expected and the person who sat down always said "Thank You". I knew the men stopped giving up their seats to women in the 60's when the "women are equal to men" era came in but I was so surprised to see feeble people standing while healthy adults and children sat. It was all I could do to not say something.
    In the 60's, men also stopped opening doors for women. Some women were actually insulted if they did. "I am perfectly capable of opening a door for myself" seemed to be the motto. I have noticed in the last number of years that men have gone back to opening the car doors and other doors for women. I think it's nice.
    My 'world' is very small and I find everyone polite. When I visit my mom if anyone is ahead of me, he or she always waits holding the door open for anyone still walking in. Each person walking in says "Thank You". My male friends always open my car door, my neighbour is always doing acts of kindness. At the super market if I can't reach an item, there is always someone who will see me trying to get something off the shelf and quickly gets it for me. My blog buddy who lives near me took me to High Tea. I always hear a lot of thank you's . As I think I have said before my 'world' is small and I know if it were bigger I would see things differently. I like my little 'world'.

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  16. Good Morning Sandie.

    Goldie - I forgot to tell you what a great blog you wrote. Thank you for that. It sounds like you have a great son.

    I am off to myspace. I will be back.

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  17. Good morning everyone! Wecome home Whab!

    The last weekend we were at the beach we went to a beach town in WA where you can drive your car onto the beach. I didn't want to take the Miata down into the sand, but Robert did. There were some pelicans down there a ways and I wanted to take pictures of them. Robert said he was going to walk back and get the car while I headed down towards the pelicans. Well he got the car ON to the beach ok, but getting it back OFF the beach was another story.
    The area where the cars where coming on/off the beach had soft sand with tire tracks where other cars and gone. So Robert got up the point where the hard sand was about to give way to the soft stuff. He gave the car a good dose of gas and we took off into the soft stuff....and then an old(er) lady walked right into our path of travel. She decided that she had to walk in the tire tracks, right where we needed to be. Unfortunately this meane Robert had to slow down, and by the time the woman got back out of our way, we got stuck. 5 feet from the end of the area of soft sand to the gravel road. Dang. We got out and tried to give it a little push. Nothing. Then he dropped down and started moving the sand from in front of the back tires. Still nothing. Someone then drove by in a big truck and offered to pull us out. Robert thanked him and said we would be fine once he moved some sand. Still stuck. We moved a little more sand and then a guy came over and offered to give us a push. So Robert jumped in the car and me and the other guy gave the car a good shove and got it free! It was so nice of people to offer to help when they could have just sat there and laughed at us!

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  18. Morning Owls!

    Great topic Goldie! I do think that as a society people are getting more rude. A pet peeve of mine is when there is a traffic jam and people drive in the breakdown lane past everyone waiting and then try and cut in. I have been known to position my Jeep so they can't get by.

    I have noticed too, that people tend to be rude to elderly people, treating them like they have no business being out and about inconveniencing others.

    I did have a nice thing happen the other day, a women who had many items to my one, let me go ahead of her in the checkout line. A small thing, but I was totally surprised and gratified.

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  19. Good morning!

    Congrats to Iteach for first, yay!

    Goldie this is a fabulous blog!

    I have to run over to the other house then to the store, so I will have to post the rest later.

    Have a nice day everyone!

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  20. Good Morning Barbara and East Bay J.

    I am off with my friend Brian to the country to buy some local strawberries. I will be back this afternoon.

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  21. one more comment.....

    I know I have talked about this before, but it's worth repeating.

    After 9/11 when we were leaving Hawaii we had to wait in Honolulu for several hours. There were people and armed servicemen/women all over the airport. People were sitting on the floor because all of the seats wer taken. Robert and Bryan decided to walk around and Katie and I were lucky to have seats so we stayed in the gate area. A very elderly couple came into the area adn were looking around for seats. She had a cane and they both looked very frail. No one....NO ONE...got up and offered their seats. There were several men and teens who should have jumped up, but no one did. I told Katie to hold my seat. I walked across to where they were and told them that I had 2 seats and they could have them. So I walked them over, they thanked us and Katie I sat down on the floor. I was shocked that not one man, even the man I had been sitting next too, didn't get up. I walked the people over and all he did was turn the other way and ignore what I was doing. It was sad.
    My son always holds doors, say thank you, and is very polite in public. Now at home....well that's another story altogether!

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  22. Thanks, Tink and VIG! It's nice to be back in cyberspace, and nice to know I was missed!

    Goldie: You are awesome! What a great story!!!

    Sandie: This trip has been just wonderful! I have a real soft spot in my... dare I say the word... soul... for Ontario cottage country, and we spent the last 4 days up on Balsam Lake in Ontario's Kawarthas region. Yes, the mosquitoes were terrible right at dusk, but that comes with the territory.

    And what a territory it is! The smells off the lake just pummeled me with memories of childhood, and I made sure to keep peanuts out at all times for the chipmunks.

    What is it about chipmunks? I just adore the little critters, and they are SO TAME compared to squirrels. Just before we left (everybody was waiting in the cars for me), I got my big chance to sit there quietly while "Chippie" the chipmunk scurried around me, stuffing his cheeks with the precious food.

    We just filled our days with lounging around in the shade (fabulous weather the entire time), swimming, and even going tubing behind the resort's power boat one day.

    To share all this with Huz, my sister and bro-in-law, bro-in-law's extended family, my other sister and bro-in-law and their daughters, and my parents, was priceless!

    And now... back to the Bay Area tonight!

    Mary/MI: I left you a note in A51... Ringo Starr should be fabulous!

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  23. Hi, Barb! Waving a wing atcha!

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  24. ok...now that i have written books i'm late getting ready for work!
    later!!!!

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  25. but first i have to wave back at whab!!!!

    **waving**

    :-)

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  26. Great blog topic Goldie!

    Congrats on 1st Iteach!

    Good morning Whabbear (welcome back!), Mary, Lynn D, VIG, Tinka and Sandie!

    I live in a small town where everyone knows everyone else, however, a lot of people here need major attitude adjustments! When I ask for help at the grocery store you would think I had just asked them for their first born child! They let out this huge sigh as if they had been holding their breathe for ten minutes, and roll their eyes! All I wanted was a box of Rice Krispies from the top shelf.

    Most people around here will hold a door open for you and say "thanks" if you do it for them. We have a one lane bridge on the edge of town. The rule is whoever gets there first goes across and when you get to the other side you wave and acknowledge the person who let you cross. The same thing when you stop to let someone walk across the street or a car pull out of a parking spot down town. Not everyone does this but most do.

    It doesn't take that much time out of our day to stop and hold a door open when you see someone struggling with packages or to say thank you. I often see people with one or two items at the checkout and I will let them go ahead of. I have had people do that for me. It's just plain nice!

    Thanks you and have a nice day! See I can be nice, damnit!

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  27. Goldie LOL at cuffing your son so many times in the head. I still think he sounds not only great but divine!

    I remembered something! Wohoo

    About a month ago I went to do the weekly food run for the foodbank. My friend could not go with me as she had to take her Mom to the doctor.

    I went and picked up the food and there was so much that I had a heck of a time getting all in my little car.

    I drove back to the foodbank and was just dreading the thought of unloading all of it by myself. I have to unload and carry it down a flight of stairs then weigh it and hoist it onto tables as we can't leave anything on the floor.

    I Pulled up and the building we are housed in is a school house built in 1915. The community has been trying for years to get it restored. Well they finally had enough money to get the exterior painted. There we two men on lifts working on the gutters getting ready to paint.

    I drove around them and pulled up to the gate and door for the foodbank still wondering how long and how much stamina I had to unload all of this food.

    Well bless their hearts one of them came off the lift when he saw me open my trunk and realized it was crammed full. They both took time away from the job to help me unload.

    I am laughing as I remember this because they thought I was done when we unloaded the trunk. I then opened the back door and front door to the car and they realized it was full too! One of them asked me if I always drove a clown car? As it seemed never ending!

    I was so happy and grateful that they took the time to help me. It made me feel good all day! Saved my back to.

    I am a door holder and please and thank you person always! So is Mr. Lynn D and our children. My theory is I always appreciate when people are polite, so treat them like I want to be treated.

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  28. Scrishy I hope Zack is feeling better today!

    Hey where is Zona everyone???

    Whabby I loved your chippie story!

    I need to get off the puter and take my shower because today is....food pick up day.

    Love you all!

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  29. 34!!!

    Happy Tuesday..
    off to read the blog - i see Goldie has written one!!!

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  30. I have a question for all you worldly traveller. What are people's manners like in other countries? Better or worse than Canada and the US? Does it change when they find out where you are from? Enquiring minds want to know.
    Thank you!

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  31. Oh Goldie I forgot to congratulate you on raising your son to be a very nice gentleman.

    *standing & clapping*

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  32. Goldie - wonderful blog!

    When I fly - I ALWAYS say "Good Morning" to my flight attendants and at the end of the flight - thank them and the pilot for getting me to my destination safely!!!

    I open doors for everyone - I help the elderly (and short people) get groceries from the higher shelves.

    I will have to think of a random act that has happened to me.. and get back to you...

    I hope everyone has an excellent Tuesday!!
    :-)

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  33. Shirley, that's a great question and a little hard to answer because I think you have to take their culture into account.

    For instance, what we consider rude is in no way rude in Korea. They are very kind people but don't always come off that way! When walking down a busy street, you can expect to be clipped by a busy pedestrian without so much as a look back. Seems very rude to us but in their world it's very crowded and to get where you're going, you have to be aggressive!

    To them, it's extremely rude to leave your shoes on in someone's house, to not get up when someone leaves, and there are lots of others.

    In Korea, a red light is just a suggestion. Lane markers are just pretty--they can make six lanes in a three-lane highway!

    In my opinion, you have to look at it that way or you'll always be an angry American!

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  34. Iteach - congrats on FIRST..

    waving to Iteach, Whabby, Mary in MI (good luck with your hair appt today), Lynn D, VIG, Goldie, Tinka, Sandie, Barb in WA, Scirish, EBJ, Shirley, and anyone else that lands!!

    :-)

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  35. I meant to say "ugly" American, although you'll be angry, too!

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  36. Great question Shirley!

    I lived in Germany quite a few years ago and found the Germans to be wonderfully kind and friendly people. Their attitude towards Americans seemed to be based on how you, as an individual, acted. I had many shopkeepers help me with my sometimes pathetic attempt at speaking German. However, those same shopkeepers would ignore the brash American tourists who demanded English be spoken.

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  37. Thank you Sandie and Scirish for your answers to my question.

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  38. Good Morning Owls!

    I find that good manners are shocking to people now adays, since they are rarely seen. I was raised by a British mom (who was raised in a Church of England boarding school in India) so manners were extremely important. She would always point things out to me. I can especially remember when we would visit Canada in the early 70's, my mother would say "Listen to the Canadian children. They say "pardon" instead of "huh" or "what"." So I started saying pardon, which has truend into Excuse Me. I must say it often because my daughter says "Excuse me" all the time... and I hear constantly how polite my children are.

    I can also remember being on crowded buses in Baltimore and my mother telling me to give up my seat to an elderly woman, or a pregnant woman. I would never expect someone to give ME their seat, but when I see an elderly, disabled or pregnant person I jump at the chance to offer them a seat.

    My husband, Berry, was raised in WV and his parents are from the South. He always says Ma'am and Sir... and he used to say Yes Ma'am to ME, but I told him to knock it off! It made me feel old in my 30's... and now he only uses it if he wants to tell me I am going overboard with nagging. It's OK though... I call him John which is his father's name. I won't tell you what I think of his dad. I'm going to be polite!

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  39. By the way, Shirley, on the way home from Korea once, we spent about four days in Victoria. We loved it and found everyone to be very kind and polite. Heck, I was ready to move there it was so beautiful!!

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  40. Doggone it! I forgot again to say:

    Congrats on being 1st, iteach!!

    Hello to Whabbear, Barbwa and all of my other friends in the nest!! Thanks to those of you who have recently added me to their MySpace friends.

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  41. I'm reading comments that say manners are lost these days but here in the south they are alive and well! I have to say that it's rare to come across a rude person here--and if you do, they're a transplant!

    Glynis, I spent most of my adult life near Baltimore and yes, I think there's a huge difference between here and there.

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  42. HI back at ya'll!!!!!!!

    It's gonna be a hot one here today. In the 90's. But the office is like a freezer so I have on a light weight jacket. So far so good.

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  43. Just read that Matthew McConahayhayhay and his girlfriend had a baby boy!!

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  44. Ah, my little Bear Buddy is back !


    Hi gang !

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  45. Hi Everyone!

    I was taught from the time I was very little to say please and thank you. To open the door for others and give up my seat to older people or anyone that seemed to need it more than I did. If you let someone at the store go ahead of you in line, or offer to take their cart to the cartrack for them, you will get the biggest smiles.

    Mr. Z always opens the door for me, and he will stand there and hold it open for anyone else that is approaching. He waves people on at four way stops, or as they are pulling out of their parking spots.

    I think that showing good manners is a way that we are all able to be kind to one another. It only takes a second to do something nice, treat someone nice...and wouldn't it be great if it was second nature to everyone??? What a wonderful world it would be.

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  46. Happy Tuesday Owls. I am doing another quick fly by. I have already gotten my nails done and caught up on the salon gossip and am leaving soon to get my Jenny Craig food for the week. Not much gossip goes on there.

    Iteach: congrats on #1 again.

    VIG: How nice of your neighbor to notice those UPS alerts and take them off and even call them for you. My next door neighbor picked up a package that was left on my doorstep by UPS when I was in "the home" after my surgery. I was very appreciative.

    Sanday: How is Zack today? Interesting info about Korea. So, red lights are just a suggestion? LOL That must have been fun trying to figure out when to 'go'

    MEK: How did Barney do with the thunder last night?

    It's going to be 106 here today and I have to usher at our musical theater. I actually stand OUTSIDE the door to direct people to the closest door to their seat. CRAP it is going to be a killer. But I will get to sit in the A/C theater to watch the show. The hills will be alive with the SOUND OF MUSIC tonight.

    Great blog Goldie.I was a Human Resource Manager before I retired and I found that most people whom you know to be polite. Some got angry, but we could usually calm them.

    But strangers are another story. I will hold a door for someone if I am going through first and rarely do I get a thank you. I will usually say 'you're welcome' even if they don't say thanks. Mostly, it has no effect.

    My hubby always held or opened doors even in the 60s and my sons do also. We tried to teach the boys manners and I hope they still practice them when I am not there to 'cuff them' LOL

    Hello Whabby; WB and safe travels home.

    Waving a wing to Carol, Mary, Tinka, Barb/WA, Scirish, EBJ, Shirley, Glynis and all who land after me. I'm off again (and I'm leaving too). BBL

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  47. ITEACH: CONGRATS on FIRST!!

    GOLDIE: I forgot, GREAT BLOG!!! I'll blame that oversight on my headache, sorry! :)

    WHABBEAR: I missed you! Great to see you back again. I love chipmunks..have never seen one in real life..but I do have my Chip and Dale stuffed animals!!!

    LYNND: HeRe I aM!! SeE mE jUmPiNg Up AnD dOwN aNd WaViNg??!!! :)

    MARY/MI: Your first avatar...LOL!!

    VIG: We were taught to write thank you notes too. When I got married I was kinda pre-occupied and didn't get my thank you cards out right away. When my mom found out that 3 weeks had gone by, and I still hadn't written them, she was so upset..I got them done that night. Well gee mom, I was "busy"...LOL!!

    SANDIE: I have to admit, the first time I was called "Ma'am" I think I cried a little...;)

    TINKA: When you visit, you'll still be in 'your' world...Mr Z will make sure of it. He is incredibly polite.

    MEK: I can so identify with helping people get things off the top shelf in store! Because my knee is so bad, I often have to ask for help to get something off the bottom shelf..and I am always greeted with a smile and the help I need!

    SCIRISH: Sorry I missed your blog yesterday..it was very good. I still have the same hairstyle as I did in highschool, and it drives my friends and family nuts. I don't mind the grey hair at all..live and let live I say..;)

    TINA: Thank you for helping me get out of the movie theater when you were visiting...I might still be there if not for you...;)

    Waving HI to BARB/WA, EBJ, SHIRLEY, GLYNIS, and that cute little polar bear WANT2!!

    I see a bottle of Excedrin with my name on it. I'll be flying in and out!! Have a great day all!!!

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  48. SACBARB: We were writing at the same time...HI!! Please be careful in the heat!

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  49. Well I am from hunting for good local strawberries. We started at a farm which is walking distance from my home and the flats were $27.00 and they looked delicious. We were sure if we went further into the country we would find a better price. After 2 hours of driving and probably spending $10.00 for gas we discovered all the farms to be either out of berries or they were more expensive. One farm was selling their flats for $46.00. We ended up back at the farm which is one quarter mile from my house and buying a flat from them. I felt like Dorothy after she came back from Oz that there really is no place like home.
    I am off for my nap and then an afternoon of making some jams and freezing the rest. Zona, you would love it here today. It's sunny and 78 degrees with just the tiniest of breezes. I really think you should spend a month of your summers here.
    Have a great day everyone.
    Yes Bear, we really did miss you. You didn't notice that VIG had taken me for High Tea.

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  50. Please excuse typos. I went to click on 'edit' and I clicked 'publish' instead. Bye for now.

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  51. TINK: Sweet dreams!!

    Ok, Excedrin has caffeine in it..now I need to stop bouncing off the walls!

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  52. LOL@Tink! I did notice, but wasn't sure if you were referring to VIG or another Vancouver Island blogger!

    Hello, SacBarb!

    Zona: You've never seen a chipmunk live? Time to head to the mountains!

    OK, will check back in after the flight. Chiao for niao!

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  53. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  54. Bear:

    Missed you while you 'got your travel on'
    Now it's time to unwind (or is it unravel?) on
    home to your own gorgeous Bay Area~
    Or will it now be known as the "gray" area?
    Nah, I think it's downright nifty
    That you'll join us oldsters over fifty!

    Are you heading off to 'where your heart sings'?
    (your very own 'casa de Palm Springs')
    or will you spend your day being a menace
    to those who invite you to play tennis?
    Tonight, you can't watch Tiger golfing....
    so will it be Lone Star's Patrone you'll be rolfing?

    May your Summer be relaxed and unharried
    As you plan for the Fall and getting married!!
    We know Jim loves his furry sweet talker......
    But does he know 'bout you and Dan Blocker???

    Seriously, wish you All the Very Best!!
    Hope you have time to stop in the Nest......
    H*A*P*P*Y 50TH B*I*R*T*H*D*A*Y

    July 8, 2008 5:42 PM

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  55. Nice blog Goldie. Your son sounds like one to be proud of.
    It makes me feel better about myself if I help family, friends or strangers. I will help anyone but I don't like being taken advantage of. Oh well, who does. When I lived in Louisiana the people there were so laid back and always full of old fashion manners. In large cities people seem to be in such a rush that they don't really give a chit about being thoughtful towards those around them. I work with customers all day long and they yell and scream and cuss as if they are used to throwing tantrums all their lives to get their way. Ewww!
    Personally I think people should treat others with respect at all times. Our Lord is watching and some day you will have to explain all of the misdeeds to Him before getting a pass into Heaven's gates. I respect everyones religion but that is how I feel and believe. :0)

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  56. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~

    now i gotta read~ bbl~

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  57. Wabbear!
    Chippie the Chipmunk sounds really cool.
    I had Rocky the racoon who visited me every night at 10PM when I lived by a creek and woods awhile back. He became so tame that he wanted to come inside my home for his unshelled peanuts but I had to teach him to just wait for me at the patio door. I wasn't afraid of his long claws as he stuck them out for me to hand him his treats. I miss Rocky and think of him often.

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  58. Hi Hooters! Finally had to come in out of the sun. 90* is definitely my max and we still have 3 or 4 more hours to 'warm up'.

    Mindful blog and great parenting Goldie!

    My two favorite daily kindnesses to both give and receive have already been mentioned....letting the person with fewer items (or wrestling small children) go ahead in lines, an allowing people to merge in traffic. Neither are a big deal to me, but if we all did it, the world might be a happier place.

    Hope everyone has a comfy--if not productive--day!

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  59. Bon~ I LOVED your message to Whab! Dr. Suess lives!!

    My daughter just asked me if her friend that spent the night last night could stay a second night. I said Yes. I feel like such a pushover.... but it has been so nice not listening to "Mom, I have nobody to play with....I'm so boooorrrrred!"

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  60. Whabby...Welcome back! I have missed you as well. Your description of Chippy brought back memories...I had a chipmunk I fed when I stayed at my Grandparents house one summer and was in tears when it was time for me to leave. No one could understand why I was so upset as all I could do was blubber. My Granpa figured it out and promised to feed "him" for me. Next Spring my friend was back, with a bunch of babies scurrying along.

    PinkTink...I like your world! I wish all of it was the same...I get so mad at people being rude or unfair to each other...I scare myself sometimes.

    Sacbarb...A women after my own heart! I often say "You're Welcome" when a "Thank You" is not given...as you said it usually has no effect...

    On that note....Thanks to all who asked about Zack...It still was not a good day. He is uncomfortable and crying on occasion. I called my vet to see if I could increase the pain med from once a day, but they didn't have the records from the hospital and wouldn't authorize that. Of course "my" Dr wasn't on today, so no one could do crap! I soaked him in warm water and he seemed to get comfort from that...but I'm still pissed! My dog is crying and I can't help him! I can tell when the meds wear off, but I'm afraid to give him more without the vets say so ....wtc!!!

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  61. SacBarb - thanks for asking about Barney - the thunder didn't roll in as loud as previous nights and I went to bed - SO, I assume he did okay - all I know is that he was NOT in my lap!! LOL.. Enjoy THE SOUND OF MUSIC!!!

    Zona - I would help you with the lower shelves also!
    :-)

    it's been overcast here all day -

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  62. Mary...How did the hair appt go? I have a vested interest :)

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  63. Scirish - I like my world too. It may be small and a lot of people would think it is boring but it suits me to a T. I feel so badly about Zack. I would phone the hospital and start demanding that another doctor o.k. increasing the meds. You can tell that he needs more. Start screaming a little. I would. Another doctor at the hospital should be able to authorize an increase.

    My strawberries are all 'put down' for the winter. I feel like Whabbear's Chippie the Chipmunk who has his nuts tucked away for the winter - or
    do only squirrels do that.
    Whatever, it feels good. Now if my back would just improve I would be in Heaven today.

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  64. I met the nicest lady today who was shopping at the open market where I was comparing strawberries. She saw me looking at plantain. I have never eaten it. She stopped and explained how it tasted, how to cook it, where it came from and exactly which ones to choose. She took about ten minutes of her time to explain all this to me. A random act of kindness I would say. There are still nice people out there. It's a shame they aren't all like that.

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  65. Zona....I wish I had "live and let live" in regards to gray...I started with the "Natural Instincts" wash out color a few year ago to give my hair more body, when I couldn't manage to do the wash out color myself anymore, I had the hairdresser do it. She did not do "wash out" stuff (*sniff, sniff*) so I could get a "low peroxide" color only. I dyed my hair my own color...but now it is starting to not be my "own" color any more....The gray has stopped creeping and has launched a full out war. So now what do I do? I don't mind the gray, but I hate roots so I don't want to go blonde...but I don't want the top of my hair to look two toned. Dye looks one color on gray and another on the gross non color it turns before gray and yet another color on the hair that is still hanging in...Highlights, maybe???? Anyone???? My "real" hair is a medium reddish brown. The dyed grays are a strawberry blonde color (which it was growing up) but it is going to look weird lighter on top...I need advice!!!!

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  66. iteach~ congrats on first~

    missed you too bear~

    mary/mi~ did you get your miracle :)~

    Goldie~ I loved your story...sadly things like that happen all the time~ (the part about no one giving up their seat for someone who needs it~)

    Tinka~ hmmmmm...who is brian? :D

    Shirley~ I agree with the others about other cultures. I try and go out of my way to be nicer in other countries because of the "ugly American" syndrome! I watched a "gentleman" walk into a cafe in France and demand that the girl find someone to speak English to him to help him. The woman pretended not to understand (there was a woman in the back who spoke English!) and the man went away angry. I apologized and the lady smiled and understood! Sometimes people think my family is from Canada instead of the U.S. because we are polite....he-he! I love the shock on their faces when they find out we are American~

    Oh Zona~ were you busy in the pool? :)~

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  67. Goldie...great blog~ I had a story to tell and now can't remember it...you lucky people~ :D

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  68. Scirish, I don't understand--you said you don't want gray roots so you don't want to go blonde, but aren't you going to have gray roots no matter what color you choose?

    I have lots of gray and went blonde just so I don't have to color every five days which is what I would have to do if I went dark.

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  69. TINA: I was going to have a salami sandwich for dinner..but that plan didn't quite come together..so I am trying to come up with something else..any ideas?? ;) Oh, and was I busy in the pool...when?? ;)

    MEK: I have no doubt you would help me!! :)

    WHABBEAR: I've never seen a squirrel, either. I have been to the mountains, though I was probably distracted by other things. :)

    TINKA: I would love to spend a month there in the summer. We could sit on the deck and enjoy the windchimes!! Did you ever get a gardener that looks like Matthew Mcconaughey??? ;)

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  70. Tink....Thanks! I just called the hospital, got transferred all over the place...and got ticked...I had left a message today that they needed to get the info to my vet and nothing happened. When I just called the woman was very nice, but asked if I could hold as she had two emergencies in front of her. The main desk had transferred me there. I had told her it wasn't an emergency, but that was where I came in so I had to talk to them???? Good Grief!!!! All I want is to make Zack comfy so he can heal and not have surgery...I think this kind of runaround stuff is what makes people rude!!! I sure want to be right about now..

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  71. Today is Whabbear's birthday?? Happy, happy Birthday, Whabby!

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  72. I am happy to report that I survived another day at the beauty parlor. Poor gal, there is only so much she can do lol!

    Shirley~ I was told that the French were not very friendly and didn't smile very much. In the areas I was in it was just the opposite. I was treated to many smiles pardons and "bonjours".The same in Italy.
    In a few instances I noticed a few "not nice" Americans.
    The biggest thing I noticed in Italy,France and Amsterdam airports, is the way they acted while waiting in long lines. It seamed more like a huge family/friends reunion.People chose to use the time to get to know each other instead of being impatient.

    scirish~ I'm not ignoring your hair question. I have tried to send it 3 times. My service is wonky and keeps knocking me off!
    I copied & pasted thank goodness. I will try again. This post has gotten long so I will split it up.
    to be continued.....

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  73. Sandie....ooooops....the difficulty in typing and talking...I don't really care about covering up the gray...both my Mom and Dad have the wonderful silver stuff and I am getting that too....I just am not sure what to do to not make myself into a tri-colour hair monster. I colored for volume and would like to continue to do so...but am confused as to how to handle the changes

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  74. Hi Hooters!

    Thank you for all the lovely comments on my blog today as well as those about my son. I think both my boys turned out pretty well- but I had help. Mr. Goldie and my parents who made my brother, sister and I use manners too. They were from the old country and manners where top priority! If you didn't use proper manners at the table you got your knuckles rapped with my dads fork. :)

    Is it Bears B-day? Happy Birthday and happy you are back in the fold.

    tina~ my friend is having a complete meltdown with Delta right now. Hope YOU Didn't get her on the phone today, I'm not sure that she used her manners!!

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  75. I spelled seemed, seamed lol! Where is Joey to spank me tee hee!

    scirish~ I love salt & pepper hair and tried to let mine go. Ick I was all salt! Washed my face right out!
    I am now dark auburn thanks to Aveda.
    It is dark, but not too dark. Black looks horrid on me! I would go to a salon like Aveda. They are experts at hair color. Then you can buy similar colors off the store shelf.

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  76. Okay, Scirish, gotcha! LOL! Maybe you should go to a professional hair colorist and then do it yourself after that?

    So sorry about your troubles with Zack. Poor baby.

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  77. How can it be Whabby's Birthday and we don't know it?

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETIE!!

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  78. I want someone else to get 100....enjoy!

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  79. Whabby - you will now be a member of the dreaded Red Hat Society!!

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

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  80. GOLDIE - Great blog!!! I can tell you have done a GREAT job with your boys. Above all, we are trying to teach the kids manners!!! You have to be consistent, but it is soooooooooo paying off!!! We get complimented all the time. Especially about the simple things like please and thank you. I'm shocked that people would comment......like they've never heard it before.

    Sorry, just flying in. I haven't been home much today......run, run, run!!!

    I hope everyone has a great night!!

    MUAH!!!

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  81. Hello All!

    iteach:
    Congrats on First!

    Goldie:
    Thank You for todays blog, manners are so very important to me, I get so crazed when I am confronted with a rude person.

    Your son sounds wonderful! He had great teachers :O)....

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  82. I am confused....

    I thought Whabby's birthday was tomorrow?

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  83. Zona - I'm not even going to go where my mind is going!! LOL

    Mary - glad your hair turned out okay.

    Scirish - hope everything works out for Zack...

    Jodi - congrats on 100!!

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  84. ohhhhh....Whabby in a red hat....pictures please!!!

    Happy 50th, my scientist friend! ..hugs and wonderful wishes to you

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  85. MEK: I just heard on the news that there were 2000 reported lightning strikes in your area, are you guys ok?? How is Barney doing???

    CPGEM: I think WHABBEAR's birthday is tomorrow...not positive though..

    JODI: "If I were a carpenter..." LOL!!

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  86. According to my information Whabbear's birthday is July 9th. Come on Bear clear this up for your loving friends.

    Tina - Brian is a friend and so is Dave. They are both good to me. They take me anywhere I want to go and will do any chore I ask of them. I repeat they are FRIENDS.

    Zona - Your room is ready and waiting. You would really enjoy the weather we are having this week. It is paradise here right now.

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  87. whabby turns 50 tomorrow, right?

    Zona~ were you in the pool instead of sending your thank you notes~ :)~

    Glynis...you should know better than to give up 100 to a Ho~ :D

    Goldie~ so far, I've talked to nice people....with problems~ :)~

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  88. I know I am going all the way back to April 2nd but I was never known to be speedy. Today two things made me go
    hmmmmmm.

    First - I would like to know why if I accidentally leave a kleenex or small piece of cloth in the set tub it will act as a plug and water that is dripping into the set tub will over flow onto the floor. On the other hand if I can't plug the sink plug and try to fill up the sink by using a makeshift plug of cloth the sink will empty every time.

    Secondly, why when I try to grow flowers from seeds I have very little luck and yet the most beautiful flowers are growing out of the cement patio through tiny cracks and are coming out through the brick wall? They hardly have any soil or space. Can anyone explain this to me? I am puzzled.

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  89. Tink!!!!! Thank you!!!!! It worked!!! I got the Dr. that treated him initially and she was great....She just came on duty again. She said I couldn't mess with the first med, but she is prescribing another ...I would have waited until morning to try to get the two places to communicate. Hopefully Zack will have a better night.....Again, Thank you!

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  90. Oh my...it was right....in·i'tial·ly...sorry...spelling freak at times....and my spell check is broken

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  91. TINA: Kinda, sorta uh-huh...something like that....:)

    TINKA: It sounds like the same principle as when you wait and wait for a package to come in the mail and the day you decide to call and find out what happened to it..the mailman brings it. I think someone, somewhere is messin' with us...;)

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  92. SCIRISH: YAY!! Hope Zack feels better. Btw...you have MS mail!

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  93. Hi again all! Went gross-ry shopping (more bargain rib-eyes MEK!), then got engrossed in a great book. Thought at 7:30 it was time to open up the house again, but it's still toasty (by Oregon standards-over 90).

    Yes, Bear's birthday is tomorrow! Didn't mean to start an early avalanche, just thought he might be too busy for us tomorrow.

    Scirish~~I bet if we had a current photo of you on MS, we could offer up some suggestions for your hair delimma~~hint, hint :-)

    and YAY for Zack!!

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  94. Scirish - I am so happy I helped. That has made my day. I think when it comes to serious medical problems involving our children and pets we sometimes have to make a big fuss to get the attention we need. I think that is entirely different from being demanding at the ticket office or the grocery story. Zack would tell the doctor himself if he could find the words. I hope he has a better night.

    I am off to bed early. I am not going to make the mistake of lifting heavy hanging planters again. Sometimes I forget I don't have a strong back.
    Good night everyone. God bless.
    Love, Tinka

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  95. G'NIGHT TINKA!! Sweet dreams!

    BON'O: It's 100 here..you're gaining on us...;)

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  96. ZONA~~Not even close!!...but you do recall what a weather wimp I am. :=) At least there's a nice hot breeze!

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  97. Zona- I'll have what jodi's having :)

    tina~ did you talk to a nice lady who's son is in Tennessee and is supposed to be in Atlanta- but really was supposed to fly this morning but that got cancelled and they forgot to tell him? Then they sent him to Atlanta to go to LA, so he can make his flight to Greece?? Her name is Robin and last time I saw her she was standing in the street, pacing and stewing while on hold on her cell phone. OMG- if I had my video on it would have been priceless...lOL

    Night Hooter s! Its been fun- thanks for commenting and sharing with me today.

    Brownies for everyone!!!!

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  98. scirish- I forgot to say- hope Zach feels better and Pepper sends 2 paws up!!

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  99. BON'O: I HATE when the wind blows and it's that hot...it's awful...and so deceiving...;)

    GOLDIE: ROFLMAO!!!!

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  100. Tink~Enjoy those berries! I got a bunch to freeze today, too. Now for the cherries and blueberries!

    Glynis~Thanks :-)....and having had an 'only daughter', don't guilt yourself. TWO is always better than one. Three, on the other hand, is just asking for a chick-fight!
    Zona~Even a hot wind here is better than the evening stillness. The breeze cools the sweat!

    Kudos to BarbWa & Iteach. Walk on!! I'm waiting for sunset.

    G'nite Goldie!

    Back to my book....and the fan.

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  101. Tink....both the makeshift plug and the left over tissues will do it for me every time....

    The seed/plant thing...dunno? I have started them, put up the grow light, watered, fertilized and then transplanted. I always seem to lose around the transplant time, either they wither or some critter has a very good lunch! I did a whole container herb garden last year...Everything came up soooo well....Then plants would disappear one by one overnight...I was going to do it again this year, but missed the season because of the house for my Mom....Wonder if the critters miss it?

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  102. GOLDIE...beautifully written blog today. I am sure you are so proud of the gentleman you have raised.

    I get so angry when I see kids being rude, selfish or just plain pain in the asses. But I get more angry that their parents allowed or instilled that behavior. It's true..my mother would have killed me! It was only the look we needed to see and we straightened up! We would have never even thought of having a tantrum in public.

    When I see parents behave poorly in front of their children I want to crack them upside their
    head...but that would be rude!

    I dont know why people find it so difficult to say please, thank you, excuse me or may I help. Ugghh!

    SHIRLEY...in answer to your question, almost everyone I encountered in Italy was polite, helpful and kind. Even the Americans we met! We did get horrible directions from everyone in Florence. It was almost like a game to them to eff with the Americanas!!!

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  103. Hope you all had a very nice day !

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  104. Zona - everything is okay here - I can't believe the storms we are having - had to shut it down tonight!!

    Bono - I KNEW there was something that I needed to do today - i didn't make it back to the store to stock up !! BUMMER - enjoy your ribeyes!!
    YUMMY!!!

    (are we throwing Whabby a surprise 50th B-day party tomorrow??!! sshhhh - don't tell him!!!)

    I better not stay on long...

    I hope everyone has an excellent WEdnesday!!
    :-)

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  105. Bon'O: OMG, I just read your poem to Jim... he LOL'ed at the Dan Blocker line!

    Thanks so much, everybody... I'm feeling kind of overwhelmed... our flight was delayed in Toronto by thunderstorms, so we just got back to the Bay Area. Yes, Tina, you are right... the birthday is actually "today", July 9th. Party in Rosschat tonight with Trey Hatfield, who turns 40!

    You are all just an unbelievable group of people, and I'm unbelievably lucky to be a part of this nest!

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  106. Hey Bear, It's your birthday, It's your birthday, HB2U!!!!!!!!!

    Tinka: where can I find a Brian and Dave????????

    Zona: I would get stuff off the bottom shelf for you. I probably wouldn't even have to bend over!

    MEK: I read the bulletin board for the Bachelorette today and LMAO at some of the comments. Man, they have very strong opinions. One of them even called her MeAnna. LOL

    I'm headed to bed. I hope everyone had an AMAZING Tuesday and will have an even better Wednesday.

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  107. Thank you all for answering my travel question...Sandie, Scirish, Tina, Maureen and anyone else I may have missed. Sounds like the majority of people are nice. It just takes a few "bad apples" to ruin an experience for someone.

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