AAADD

by Tinka

Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder. Somehow I feel better even though I think I have it!!


Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
 
I lay my car keys on the table,
put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back
on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think,
since I'm going to be near the mailbox
when I take out the garbage anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
so I go inside the house to my desk where
I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking.
 
I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the Pepsi aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Pepsi is getting warm,
and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
 
As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,

a vase of flowers on the counter
catches my eye--they need water.
 
I put the Pepsi on the counter and 

discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk,
but first I'm going to water the flowers.
 
I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table.
 
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,

I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,
so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,
but first I'll water the flowers.
 
I pour some water in the flowers,

but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table,

get some towels and wipe up the spill.
 
Then, I head down the hall trying to 

remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day,
and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail....

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!

His Hand In Mine

by Tinka

I would like to see my sister's favourite Elvis song on the blog.  It would be played on a small radio station just before midnight every Sunday night.  She would stay awake to hear it.  For some unknown reason I couldn't get that station. She would tell me about it and even though I thought I knew every Elvis song he ever recorded, I had never heard this one. After she died I found out it was on one of my C.D.'s.  It is now my favourite Elvis song.

That Perfect Christmas

by Tinka

My 43 year old son just stopped by with presents he had bought for me to give his wife for Christmas. He knows her tastes so much better than I do. I was surprised to see him traveling in this snowy weather. He looked like Santa Claus as he came through the door.

It appears we may have a white Christmas this year as we have already had 6 inches of snow with more expected tonight. As it is only one week until The Big Day, there is a good chance we may be having snow on the ground Christmas morning. My mind wandered back to the last time we had a White Christmas. I think that was “A Perfect Christmas”.

It was Christmas Eve 1972. My children were just over 2, 3 and 5 and Christmas excitement was high that year. I wanted it to be extra special because my son would be going into grade one the next year. Being a grade one teacher I knew that this might be the last year that all three of them would truly believe that Santa Claus would come down the chimney. Now I have always believed in Santa Claus and always will (don’t tell me any differently) but I knew that some children at 6 stopped “hearing the bell” as explained in Chris Van Allsburg’s book, “The Polar Express".

It was 7:00 in the evening, all the preparations were finished. The baking was done, presents wrapped, children were sparkling clean in sparkling new matching p.j’s. Clothes were laid out for the annual Christmas dinner at the grandparents - tiny red velvet dresses with lace sleeves for the girls and a blue (big boy) suit for Kevin.

For the first time we had TWO trees freshly cut and brought in from our trout farm at Sooke. The upstairs’ tree was decorated beautifully because that was the tree visitors would see. The downstairs' one was decorated with ornaments made by the children. You can imagine which tree was my favourite.

The children and I were sitting by the fire recording Christmas stories and songs into a large tape recorder. We recorded “Old Toy Trains“ with Glen Campbell’s help. In the background we could hear the tapping of a hammer. It sounded like elves but it was my husband putting the finishing touches on the big mountain with tracks for the electric train Santa had promised to bring. Christmas spirit was definitely permeating the air.

After a letter was written to Santa and cookies left out, three little children were tucked into bed. My husband and I, pleased with ourselves, stood looking out the window. With God as my witness it began to snow. We looked at each other and almost at the same time said, “It doesn’t get any better than this”. It was the first white Christmas Victoria had since 1945.

Christmases would come and go. Some were very good and others not but I will always have the recording of “That Perfect Christmas”.

♪♪ Young Love ♪♪

Chosen by Tinka

Young Love by Sonny James

Last Sunday, I responded to the video Carol had chosen by mentioning the fact that there were four popular songs when I bought my first car, a 1957 Nash Metropolitan. I wrote that when I hear those songs I am right back in my little "Esmerelda". Carol asked me to find one of the songs for this Sunday's Music Video; so in her words, "We can all walk down memory lane with you".

That is what I did. I found "Young Love" by Sonny James. Immediately, I was transported back to 1957. I remember every Friday at 3:00 p.m. hurriedly locking up my one-room school house where I was teacher, secretary, Principal, and school nurse all rolled into one. I would jump in my Nash, turn on the radio and Sonny would be singing my song, "Young Love". I happily drove down the Malahat so I could spend the weekend with the 'Love of my Life.' He was attending the University of Victoria. No, before you snicker, I spent the nights at my sister's house. There was no hanky-panky for me in the fifties. I married my 'one true love' in a beautiful, white dress on a hot July day in 1958. Life was good.

Tinka with her new 1957 Nash Metropolitan

Alas, it did not last. Mary Hopkins, a friend of the Beatles, later wrote and sang the song, "Those were the days my friend. We thought they'd never end. We thought we'd sing and dance forever and a day".

Is there a song that brings back memories of your "Young Love"? Will you meander down memory lane with me today?

If I Had Only Known

Chosen by Tinka

My sister loved Reba McEntire and so do I. My dad always had the radio turned to a country music station playing songs from morning until night so I guess I came by my love of country music honestly. Reba McEntire wrote the song for this video when she lost her whole crew on a flight between shows. Reba should have been on the plane but stayed behind because her baby was sick. It just wasn't her time.

I so identify with the words to this song. It is one month today since my mother's funeral. It seems like yesterday. My sister's and mother's deaths were not unexpected and I did get a chance to say "I love you" but I don't think any-one is really ready for 'the last day'. I am still thinking of things I would like to have said. Am I the only one who would like a second chance at saying something special to someone he or she has lost? Am I the only one who ponders. "If I had only known"

Remembering Elvis

The Day Elvis Died!




by Tinka

Oh, how well I remember the day I heard that Elvis died. It was August 16th at 3 p.m. I was going up a flight of stairs when my son who was listening to his radio, said "Mom, Elvis is dead". It was a good thing I was hanging on to the railing because I literally swooned. I swung around still hanging on. It was such a sudden shock. I never admitted this to any of my friends because we were far from being teenagers and my friends were so critical of how people were reacting. I don't think I left the T.V. for four days, watching all the coverage of this sad event.

My sister and her family were in Hawaii at the time. She said there were displays in every store window showing Elvis memorabilia. She was told they considered Elvis to be a native son ever since he filmed "Blue Hawaii" in 1961 and had his "Elvis, Aloha from Hawaii" concert in 1973. It was the first show to be ever broadcasted globally by satellite to more millions of people in more countries than had ever been before. They loved him in Hawaii.

The highlight of my travels was my visit to Graceland in 1996. They were already getting ready for the big 20th Anniversary that would be coming in 1997. To see his home, his jets, his memorabilia and his graveyard was a trip I will never forget. It was interesting to see the the bus load after bus load of tourists arriving, many from England, Australia and every country one could think of. Some told me it was was their 6th or 10th visit to Graceland. These women were as old or older than I was so I no longer felt I had to hide being an Elvis fan.

Do you remember the day Elvis died or was it for you just another hot day in August?

Judging a Book By its Cover

by Tinka

As I was quickly glancing through T.V. themes on UTube, I came across a show very few of us watched in 1980, called “Bosom Buddies”. What caught my eye was one of the stars. He was a 24 year old guy with black curly hair. He was cute but most girls at the time would hardly give him a second glance. He was no equivalent to our McDreamy. He did not appear to have an outstanding natural aptitude for acting. The show lasted two seasons.

Who was this young man? Well, he was Tom Hanks, who thirteen years later was the charismatic star of “Sleepless in Seattle”. In that same year he was the talented Academy Award winner for the movie "Philadelphia". The following year he won a second time for the movie "Forest Gump" (I994). And that was just the beginning of his great career.

My mind wandered back to my High School Days. (St. Ann's Academy was connected to the Catholic boys' school, St. Louis College.) I remember the "nerds" who the others did not hold in high regard. They were mostly ignored. It was the ‘sport jocks’ who got all the attention and the dates. I also remember my 20th and 40th school reunions with these two schools, where we were all very eager to find out what "everyone was doing now". To our amazement it was not the popular "hunks" who became successful. The shy, quiet, studious guys who were ignored by the "Prom Queens" turned out to be the "Stars of the Night". They were the ones who had made the greatest achievements. I don’t know the reason for this but I did pass my opinion on to my daughters. I don’t think they believed me at the time. Now they are going to their 20th school reunions and discovering the same thing. The "best" High School kids did not necessarily become the "best" adults.

Did you ever disregard any possible boyfriends because at the time you considered them to be "nerds", but actually had a great deal of potential? I think some of us did. I guess it’s the old adage, “Don’t judge a book by its cover”.

Unanswered Prayers

by Tinkatia

Unanswered Prayers, Sung by Garth Brooks

As I was returning tonight from my granddaughter's baseball game, I was listening to Garth Brooks on the car radio. He was singing "Unanswered Prayers".

I took notice of the words, "Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers." My mind wondered back to the spring of 1969. I was happily expecting my third child. The last two would be just 12 months apart, which was a common occurrence back then in "Good" Catholic families. I think they were referred to as "Irish Twins". We had a little boy and a little girl so we didn't care what the gender might be. We just wanted a healthy baby. We had names picked out for both. The nursery was ready and so was I.

On June 1st 1969 little Catherine Dawn entered the world more than two months early. She was scarcely two pounds but oh so tiny and sweet. She was rushed into an incubator. I knew there would be problems but during the previous few years the medical field had made such progress in saving these tiny babies. She was fighting to live and I prayed like I have never prayed before. Right through the day and on into the night I never stopped praying. "Please God let this be one of the success stories". All the doctors fought hard but as the sun was slowly rising little Catherine Dawn went back to Heaven. I was devastated. There were other tiny babies in the incubators and they were going to live. Why not my baby? She was so wanted. I went home empty handed and doubting my faith.

Many years later I learned that nearly all the tiny very premature babies that had been saved in the sixties had serious physical and mental problems. Almost all were blind or almost blind from the oxygen that had been pumped into the incubators. Some had cerebral palsy and most had learning disabilities when they reached school age. I think God hand picks mothers of children with special needs because they are very special themselves. I wonder if I would have been strong enough mentally and physically to meet these challenges? Would my child have needed painful surgeries or treatments? Would she have had to endure ridicule from other children because she was different? Being so sensitive myself, would I have been able to endure watching her being taunted and teased. How would it have affected my other children? Would I have had the time to spend with them? The bedtime stories, the homework, the gymnastic and other sports events, the concerts and all the other activities we do with our children; would they have been curtailed? Even now would I be going to all of my grandchildren's baseball games and dance recitals? Would I be growing my own Christmas trees? I think God answered my prayers that day. He said, "No".

Have you ever had anything that you prayed so hard for or wished so long for and never acquired it? Did you ever receive the gift of unanswered prayers?

The Circle of Life

this daily blog is from
tinkatia our
dear night owl

i have to say it brought
tears to my eyes, and yet
i am so glad she shared

The Circle of Life

by Tinkatia

Today once more I was summoned to my mom’s Care Home. She was sick and crying for me. As I was driving down to see her I started to remember all the things she had done for me when I was a child. She looked after me so protectively, brought me chicken noodle soup and ginger ale when I was sick, made sure I always had an extra sweater and held me close when I cried over a broken heart. She read me stories over and over again. Now I was taking her ginger ale. I am always worried that she is warm enough and I hold her close when she cries over her lost daughter. I listen to her stories over and over again.

I started to wonder “At what point does the mother become the child?” Does it happen the first time you tell her she should have a nap after lunch and she argues “I don’t need one.” Or is it when you tell her to try and take a few bites of dinner. “You know you will get sick if you don’t eat”. Maybe it’s when she tells you she doesn’t need to go to the bathroom and you tell her “Just try, we won’t be back in your room for an hour”. I wonder these things as I am fixing her hair with ribbons, tucking her into bed, telling her I love her and tip toeing out of her room.

My children are at the prime of their lives. They have such a busy time. There are so many activities involving their children, family, friends, school and work. There aren’t enough hours in the day for them. They have the world at their feet and they are loving it. Old age is so far away from them, they don’t give it a minute’s thought.

Two weeks ago before my children went to Hawaii, we went out to dinner. Before we left the house my daughter said to me in a very authoritative voice, “Mom, you had better bring an extra sweater. I don’t want you to get chilled at the restaurant”. I got a sharp twinge in my heart. I thought, “Oh God, not yet, it’s too soon.”