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Tuesday, January 22, 2013

THE IRISH PROSTITUTE

by Dianne 

An Irish daughter had not been home for over a year. Upon her
return, her Father cussed her. 'Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye
not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand
what ye put yer old Mother thru?'

The girl, crying, replied, 'Sniff, sniff..Dad..I became a prostitute...'

'Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a
disgrace to this Catholic family.'

'OK, Dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this
luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a $5 million
savings certificate, for me little brother, this gold Rolex, and for ye
Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked
outside plus a membership to the country club...... and an invitation for ye
all to spend New Years Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera and.......'

'Now what was it ye said ye had become?' says Dad.

Girl, crying again, 'Sniff, sniff.... a prostitute Daddy! Sniff, sniff.'

'Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye
said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old Dad a hug'.

21 comments:

Dianne/Denver said...

First on my own blog at some crazy hour called morning!!! Just up for a potty break and an iPad break and then back to sleep I go.

I'm still thinking of those 49ers coconut bra that Jodi is going to help JL buy.

Lynn D said...

Morning Glories!

Save us from the Protestants! lol

Dianne you look sleepy and lovely at first.

Dianne and J/L Yes my tooth is fixed. Hoping 3rd time is a charm. Also right now everyone is well. Fingers crossed.

Barb I hope you have a wonderful time with lots of Sunshine!

Waving a wing at everyone!

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Congrats on being first and prettiest today. I think you may be sleepwalking or hallucinating. Coconut bra? LOL

Just_Lin said...

Dianne I was so dazzled by your beauty that I almost forgot to thank you for the blog and the chuckle this morning.

Just_Lin said...

LynnD Glad your tooth is fixed and I sure hope it stays that way. Dental problems are such a pain!

Dianne/Denver said...

Jo, you need to go to Area 51 and see what Jodi wrote you about the bra. Sounds good to me

Dianne/Denver said...

I meant JL

Home from the dentist and my cleaning. I don't like to even go for that every time. I had a good report and hopefully won't have to be back for six months.

Zona said...

DI: LOL!! I kinda knew where that was going..so funny!

Did you knock on wood after you got the report from your dentist? I did after I read your comment..maybe you should do it again..just to be safe.. ;)

J/LIN: You could get a coconut purse to match!! ;)

LYNN: Knocking on wood for you too!

Thanks everyone for the feel better wishes for my back..I'm happy to say it seems to be all better! KNOCK ON WOOD!! :D

I think sometimes that the old fadoo chair is the safest place for me! ;)

Dianne/Denver said...

Quiet day in here today except I keep hearing a lot of knocking on wood. I was afraid a Woodpecker got in our nest!!! Very relieved to see it was Zona knocking around. Glad you are feeling better.

Helllooooo..hoot hoot....where are you night owls?

Jodi said...

DIANNE - Thanks for the blog....and you look stunning in #1 today ♥

Jodi said...

LYNN - Love seeing your Morning Glories!! Makes me smile :)

Jodi said...

SLIN - I think I was referring to trying to find you a 49ers coconut bra to watch the Super Bowl in!! *now where's my grass skirt? ;P

Jodi said...

ZONA - Glad your back is better!! Back to sock sliding? Thought of you the last couple of days when I've been wearing my super soft fuzzy socks during this frigid snap!!

Jodi said...

DIANNE - *waving from the infirmary branch*....I'm right here!!

Jodi said...

15!!!

Jodi said...

Coffee's ready, I've left Pepsi, Diet Pepsi and OJ in the fridge...and let's not forget the Glazers!!! Still on sale today 3 for a buck!!!

Dianne/Denver said...

Yum...I'll take three as that sounds like a deal...along with a Pepsi. Ahhhh, breakfast of champions.

Jodi, are you feeling better with this round of drugs? I sure hope so only a few more days to get well. I think you and JL are going to look lovely at this Super Bowl bar. You will be the belles of the ball!!!

Jodi said...

DIANNE - Getting there!! Head is still kinda full of snot, but I'm hoping that some sea air will fix me right up!! At least the ear pain is gone! We will b sure to post pics ;)

Jodi said...

p.s. DIANNE - still smiling at your comment "at some crazy hour called morning"!!! ;)

Jodi said...

20!!!

Jodi said...

Time to "hoist and rinse"!!

Thankfully it is not NEAR as cold as yesterday morning ♥