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Saturday, October 29, 2011

Halloween

by Dianne

A bald man with a wooden leg gets invited to a Halloween Party. He doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg, so he writes to a costume company to explain his problem.

A few days later he received a parcel with the following note:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head and, with your wooden leg, you will be just right as a pirate.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
The man thinks this is terrible because they have emphasized his wooden leg and so he writes a letter of complaint. A week goes by and he receives another parcel and a note, which says:

Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a monk's costume. The long robe will cover your Wooden leg and, with your bald head, you should really look the part.
Now the man is really upset since they have gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to emphasizing his bald head, so again he writes the Company another nasty letter of complaint.
The next day he gets a small parcel and a note, which reads:
Dear Sir,
We have TRIED our very best.
Please find enclosed a bottle of molasses and a bag of crushed nuts.
   
Pour the molasses over your bald head, pat on crushed nuts, stick your wooden leg up your ass and go as a caramel apple.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.

16 comments:

Tina~in_ut said...

Good Moaning~

Tina~in_ut said...

Di~ That's cute~ thanks for sending it in~ Hope your brother is doing okay~

Michael said...

a caramel apple!!! ...stop! ur killing me....

seriously though....I think that ACME Costume Co. acted responsibly in their recommendations except for the last one because if he stuck his wooden leg up his bobo he would not have been able to walk without the aid of an additional prosthetic.

Michael said...

BTW...can you guess my costume choice?

Tina~in_ut said...

one night stand~

Michael said...

HUMPHT!

Tina~in_ut said...

:D

sacBarb said...

Happy Saturday Owls.

Dianne, very cute blog. So sorry to hear about your brother's house.

Thanks for the birthday wishes yesterday. I had a really good day. Of course any day with George Clooney is a good day and I really liked the movie.

Waving a wing to all the Owls, even you, Michael.

Michael said...

same here...and even you Barb... :)

...throws belated birthday card out window...

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

**Acme Halloween Tricks truck pull around the back of Owl Manor**

Michael said...

theres a big truck at the service entrance!! I'm sceered!!

Since Qantas CEO grounded all the planes I doubt that Keith and Nicole will make it in for Halloween....

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

**boxes marked dangerous, body bags, buckets of blood, axes, pitchforks, rope, fog machine are unloaded and taken into the bowels of Owl Manor**

Zona said...

'ello 'ello 'ello!!

DI: Clever costume idea..I can identify with the company's frustration at the guy not liking any of their ideas... ;D

TINA: You and George are just..just..dazzling today.. :D

BARB: I'm glad you were able to celebrate your birthday with George! :D

Hmmmmm..seems George sure is getting around lately!

MICHAEL: I thought your were an unwrapped Hershey's chocolate bar! I had no explanation for the trashcan on your head.. ;)

SHIRLEY: Well I'm staying out of the Manor's bowels..ijs..

Zona said...

From 51:

J/LIN: Did you like GRIMM? I thought it was pretty good..not as good as 'Once Upon A Time' though..did you see that? It was excellent!

We do get a lot of trick or treaters..but that's what makes it fun..we really love it.

Zona said...

Mr Z is running around like a crazy person trying to get everything set up for Halloween..he's making me dizzy..lol..

I'm dusting, dusting, dusting..which is silly..cuz it's Halloween..it should be dusty..right? ;D

Have a good night everyone!!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

**a second ACME truck drives up to Owl Manor...Creepy Crawly Things**

**a thick fog engulfs Owl Manor**

**screams can be heard from the bowels of Owl Manor**

**howls can be heard in the distance**

Muahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!