Pages

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The Ostrich

by Michael

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll  have the same," says the ostrich.
  
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $9.40 please." The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62." Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.
 
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir.  How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?"
 
"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
  
"That's right..Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?"    
The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say.." 


16 comments:

Bebbi said...

OH yes..baby.

goldie said...

Hilarious!

Hi Bebbi the beautiful!!

Bebbi said...

Hi Goldie! Good morning!

Bebbi said...

Michael: That was funny..just had time to read it...LOL..cute one!

whabbear said...

LOL!

A woman and a lizzard walk into a bar...

Bebbi said...

Whabby!! Ohhhh that is funny!!!!!! :)

Bebbi said...

Good morning to you too.

Tinka said...

Good Morning Bebbi, goldie, and Whabbear. Happy first day of Summer. Hope it is a good one.

Michael - I will read your story after I get my cleaning lady settled.

Bebbi- Congrats on being first.
See you all later.

Tinka said...

9

Tinka said...

10

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

**sniff sniff sniffle**

I'm not pretty anymore!! Whaaaaaaaaa!!!!!

Bebbi said...

You can have mine,Shirley.. :) Quiet day here. I am giving over my #1 to Shirley..so anyone floating in after this..please congratulate her! :) There ya go Shirley, no more tears now! :)

Maureen said...

SHIRLEY...you're absolutely brilliantly gorgeous today!

BEBBI...you're not too bad yourself!

GOLDIE...you look like a million bucks, too!

WHABBY...you're one handsome bear!

TINKA...always so pretty in pink!

I'm baaaaaaaaack! Didja even know I was gone?

Bebbi said...

Welcome back Mo..not sure why it's so quiet in here today.

Maureen said...

Thanks, BEBBI

whabbear said...

Thanks, 'weenie!!!!!

And Bebbi, glad to make you smile! BTW, I was envisioning a lizard with a very active tongue...