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Monday, October 17, 2011

Rules for Halloween for Seniors

by Dianne

You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when:

10. You keep knocking on your own front door.

9. You remove your false teeth to change your appearance.

8. You ask for soft high fiber candy only.

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.

6. People say: 'Great Boris Karloff Mask,' And you're not wearing a mask.

5. When the door opens you yell, 'Trick or...' And you can't remember the rest.

4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.

3.  You have to carefully choose a costume that doesn't dislodge your hairpiece.

2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.


And the number one reason Seniors should not go Trick Or Treating...
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1. You keep having to go home to pee.


No matter,  have a HAPPY HALLOWEEN anyway.

20 comments:

Tina~in_ut said...

Di~ thanks for sending in the blog today~ :D

Maureen said...

TINA...good moaning. I see your hard at work!

Tina~in_ut said...

lmbo....I AM!!!!! I feel like I'm juggling~ ugh~

Tinka said...

Good Morning Tina - Have fun at work.

Good Morning Maureen. I hope you had a great birthday. Thanks for the well wishes for Jack. I am trying to get him to slow down. He is a retired High School Principal who should be taking it easy. Instead he works very hard at the trout farm. He loves it and says he is retired but it looks like work to me.

Dianne - Funny blog. Aren't you glad we aren't seniors yet?

Off for a mammo! Ugh

Have a great day everyone.

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Splat!

Afternoon Tina! Don't "work" too hard!

Afternoon Maureen! How was the birthday?

Afternoon Tinka! I don't think most men are content unless they have something to do.

Maureen said...

TINA...that was a terrible tragedy yesterday in Vegas. My heart goes out to all the families and drivers. So sad his children lost their father.

TINKA...Some men just like to feel in control and so independent. I hope Jack slows down.

SHIRLEY...it was a nice long weekend. Lots of good food and family around. And I do feel a year older!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Sorry Dianne, I forgot to comment on your blog! Oopsie! So this is what I have to look forward to? Thanks for sharing your experiences with us!

Zona said...

Good Morning!!

DI: Loved #5..that would be me! :D

TINA: And what a lovely and talented juggler you are this morning..c'mon and keep those balls up!! :D

TINKA: Ugh is right! I know everything will be ok! :)

Waving HI to MO and SHIRLEY!

Mr Z was on our local news this morning..no it wasn't a perp walk or anything..they did a segment on his pumpkin carving skills..he did pretty good..When he shook the anchor's hand my sister called and yelled 'Eeek..they showed his finger stump!!'..but she only saw it cuz she knew what to look for..lol..it's ok anyway..afterall..it IS almost Halloween.. ;D

Tinka said...

Back from the Mammo clinic. Ouch, glad that's done for a year. If there was a similar test for men I think they would have found a less painful way to be tested.

Maureen - You are so right about men, control and independence. I guess we love them in spite of it.

Shirley - I am just watching the news about the crash in Vegas. I didn't know about it until I read your comment. Then I turned on the TV and they are talking about it. They are saying it was the worst crash ever witnessed there.

from area 51 - Thank you Just_Lin for the well wishes for Jack. He is doing quite well.
My pie turned out great. It always tastes better when the apples come from your own tree.

Tinka said...

Good Morning Zona - We were typing at the same time. I would love to see Mr. Z's TV performance. Call me this morning if you have time. I am home earlier than I thought.

Just_Lin said...

Moaning Tina Good juggling today. Does Janice still sit by you? You haven't mentioned her in a while.

That crash yesterday was so horrific. How sad for his family.

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Thanks for the blog but I don't relate to any of those. Well, maybe the soft candy one........and maybe the need to pee one.....and maybe the..........

Tina~in_ut said...

J/L~ Janice doesn't werk here anymore! :( She transferred to the airport 2 weeks ago.....so I made Judi sit next to me~ She actually has a better sense of humor~ We'll see if she has anything to offer! :)~

Just_Lin said...

Tinka I bet your apple pie was just as delicious as your famous buns. Jack is a lucky man.

Just_Lin said...

MO I'm glad you had a nice birthday. I stopped enjoying celebrating mine many years ago.

Just_Lin said...

Zona I hope the news person didn't think he lost the end of his finger while practicing his pumpkin carving skills.

Just_Lin said...

Tina Well, shoot! We didn't even get a chance to say goodby.

Just_Lin said...

I have to shop for a new computer today. Yikes!

Unknown said...

if you haven't seen Dottie Mae....get a tissue and follow this link...

this 41 year old woman with brain cancer wouldn't take chemo for fear of harming her unborn baby...

The Mother was dying so they took the baby early....and Mom lived long enough to hold her...

the most moving thing I think I have ever seen...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/10/16/mom-with-cancer-tk-giver-_n_1014463.html

Dianne/Denver said...

Howdy everyone...thanks for the comments on the blog today. Now u all know how I spend Halloween

Anxious to hear about Randys tv debut today. Very exciting to know a celebrity

Pretty cool here today---for sure fall is here

Hope everyone has a good night