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Thursday, December 29, 2011

New Year's Resolutions for 2012

by Shirley

For some reason this new year the resolutions have more to do with driving habits, personal hygiene and the safe handling of explosives instead of the usual lose weight, get more exercise and eat less canned meat products. Okay, maybe that last one isn't usual.
This year, I resolve to:

Always replace the gas nozzle
before driving away from the pump.
I will always "check for paper"
when leaving the restroom.



I will try to drive closer to the speed limit.

I will always wear clean underwear, "just in case".

I will keep an extra safe distance when driving behind police cars.

I will no longer park the BMW
 next to fire hydrants.

and never again will I try to diffuse an explosive device with the help of a known practical joker.  
Have a Safe and Happy New Year!

17 comments:

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Splat!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Oh look Tina I'm precious again at first, and gorgeous!! Much better that that old George or Hughe or McDickhead!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Just to clarify, McDickhead was NOT a referene to Michael, it was to that Greys Anatomy dude that people swoon over.

Tinka said...

Good Morning Shirley - Love your blog - very funny.

I am still compiling my list of New Year's resolutions. I am on page three so far.

Must check farms. Be back later.

Zona said...

Good Morning!

SHIRLEY: Funny blog..loved the last one..I know..that could get you shot..or blown up..but it was funny.. :D

TINKA: LOL..I can so identify.. :D

I better go start writing my list of resolutions before I forget them..dang short term memory.. ;D

Have a nice day everyone..it's going to be 72* here..I ordered that up special.. ;D

Lynn D said...

Morning Glories!

Shirley I resolve to try to do all of those too! Especially the clean undies. Ewwwww

Waving at Tinka,Zona and Shirley!

Just_Lin said...

Shirley Congrats on b3eing most precious (and gorgeous) today. Thanks for clarifying about McDickhead. LOL

Just_Lin said...

Tinka I can't think of any resolutions. Maybe I can borrow one of yours.

Just_Lin said...

Zona Next time, can you order some of that 72 for me, too. It's about 58 here.

Just_Lin said...

LynnD I read on FB that, besides quitting smoking, you also stopped drinking sodas. I need to use you as inspiration. I've been totally into sodas lately, for some reason, especially Coke. Coke is one of the things I'm supposed to limit because of my high kidney values. I haven't been doing a good job of monitoring any of the things I need to limit for that same reason....like salt and chocolate.

Maureen said...

I resolve to eat more junk food, smoke more, sleep less and maybe take up drinking...resolutions I think I can actually keep!

Maureen said...

SHIRLEY...you look gorgeous and precious, too.

LYNN...you have much to be proud of. Congrats for your strength!

JUST LIN...give yourself a break and before you know it you will be back on track

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Lynn D, Just Lin, Tinka, Maureen and Zona thanks for the comments! Nighty night!!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

**six Acme Fireworks trucks roll up the driveway of Owl Manor**

You guys can unload and set up down by the tennis courts.

Just_Lin said...

MO I keep regaining weight I lost. It's very frustrating, not to mention I really need to be more careful about my kidneys. I ate the last two pieces of fudge tonight so at least I don't have to worry about that anymore. LOL

Just_Lin said...

Shirley Oh, boy! New Year's Eve party supplies?

Tina~in_ut said...

I've decided to become as fat as I possibly can this year!!! I've got a head start!!!!

Visited hubby's family today......did a lot of chopping with mil.....niece is having a baby tomorrow ......yay.....a tax deduction .......goodnight all~