Friday, December 21, 2012

Cletus & Billy Bob

by Dianne

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere.

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left.. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, "What the world're ya doing, Billy Bob?"

"Good grief, Cletus, ya scared the bejeebers out of me," says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob.

"But me 'n the wife been havin trouble lately in the bedroom
d'partment, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor."


(Don't make me come splain this to you! Read the last line again, slowly.)


Dianne/Denver said...

Ok, breaking all rules and being first on my own blog!!!

Morning...been awake since 7am. I'm so a night/morning owl but I don't get up. I just play on iPad laying here.

Today I have appt with surgeon. I'm always nervous about those as my leg is not straightening enough. Wish me luck

Tinka said...

Good Luck Dianne. I will be thinking of you.

Dianne/Denver said...

Thanks tinka.

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Good luck today. At least you are looking very pretty for the surgeon.

We need Shirley back in here to start enforcing the rules, don't you think?

Just_Lin said...

Tinka Good morning!

Just_Lin said...

I'm now second quessing every gift I bought. Does anyone else do that?

Mary/MI said...

Hi beautiful Dianne perched so cute on that branch!

Good luck tomorrow. Even after 6yrs my leg still doesn't fully extend. I find that my recumbent bike helps keep the muscles stretched.
btw, I almost got excited until the "dirty t-shirt showed up lol!!

Tinka, good seeing you commenting. I know you are being very careful with your eyes.

We woke up to a white yard and 50mpr wind gusts! We only got a couple of inches of snow, so not to bad. A good day to stay in and enjoy a book and listen to music :)

Mary/MI said...

Justlin, lol, I was doing just that this morning!!

sacBarb said...

Dianne, Hello Ms. Beauty. I Married an Okie, so I didn't need no splianin, but it did take a few years before I understood most of their conversations. In the early years of our marriage, I would make mental notes of things I didn't 'get' and ask the Hubby about it later.

sacBarb said...

Tinka, How's the eye?

J/L, I always second guess what I got for people, unless I have been told specifically what they want.

Mary, will the snow last through Christmas. One year I was in Denver for Christmas and it snowed on Christmas Day and I loved it. No. 3 son wasn't so happy about driving in it, however.

sacBarb said...

It has rained all night, is still raining and is supposed to keep it up through Christmas. Boo :( And it is COLD, for California at least. I had to be out in it this morning and I hope not to have to go out in it again until Sunday!

Have a good day everyone.

Just_Lin said...

Mary I also never feel like I've done enough.

Just_Lin said...

SacBarb It's been cold, raining, and gusty winds all day. Right now there is a break in it but more is on the way. I'm hoping not to have to go out in it tomorrow but I probably will.

Just_Lin said...

Sweet dreams, HOoters!

Blogger said...

I've just downloaded iStripper, so I can have the best virtual strippers on my taskbar.