Monday, December 10, 2012

Irish Birth Control

by Dianne 

Mrs. Donovan was walking down
  O'Connell Street in Dublin when
  she met up with Father Flaherty.

The Father said, 'Top o' the mornin'
 To ye! Aren't ye Mrs. Donovan
  And didn't I marry ye and yer
  Hoosband two years ago?' 

She replied, 'Aye, that ye
 did, Father.'

The Father asked, 'And be
 there any wee little ones yet?'
She replied, 'No, not yet, Father.'

The Father said, 'Well now,
  I'm going to Rome next week
  And I'll light a fertility candle for ye
  And yer hoosband.'
She replied, 'Oh, thank ye, Father...'
  They then parted ways.. 
Some years later they met again. 
The Father asked, 'Well now,
Mrs. Donovan, how are ye these days?' 

She replied, 'Oh, very well, Father!'

The Father asked, 'And tell me,
Have ye any wee ones yet?'

She replied, 'Oh yes, Father!
Two sets of twins and six singles,
Ten in all!' 

The Father said, 'That's wonderful!
And how is yer loving hoosband doing?' 

She replied, 'E's gone to Rome
To blow out yer fookin' candle.'



Zona said...

Good Morning!

DI: LOL! I'm tellin' ya..those candles work!! :D

From 51:

DI: Yep..cookie season is upon us..oh joy! My sister and I are going to make ours this weekend there will be a fight for the kitchen..should be interesting.. ;)

MARY: I'll YouTube that song right now..thanks!

There was a news guy on TV this morning giving a report from a Fed Ex office..he was popping bubble wrap through his entire report..he said he couldn't remember being so happy while doing a story..I completely

Lots of laundry to do off I go!! Have a good day everyone! :)

Zona said...

MARY: Very pretty much emotion in his voice..thank you for telling me about it! :)

Dianne/Denver said... goodness you are stunning at first take my breath away!!!! Must be that tank top, shorts and bare feet!!!

I'm pretty sure those candles at your house work. So good.

sacBarb said...

Happy Monday.

Di, yes, I believe the candles really work, sometimes like in this case, too well. I went to Catholic school with many kids who had 7, 8, and 9 siblings. They must have lit many candles.

Zona, congrats on being our first beauty today.

Waving a floppy wing to all the other Owls. I hope you all have a good day.

Lynn D said...

Morning Glories!

LOL Dianne

Going to get ready to run into Lacey the next big town to do some shopping.

Can't become a blonde until Wednesday, darn it!

Hope everyone has a great day.

Zona said...

DI: Inhaler!!! :D I have fuzzy socks on today..better for sock slidin' through the kitchen to get to the laundry room dontcha know..wheeeee.. :D

BARB: The bubble wrap story made me think of you! POP! POP! POP! POP! :D

LYNN: I can't wait to see a's gonna look awesome! :)

Dianne/Denver said...

Ok miss google Zona----I googled where my presents are and google doesn't even know.

Zona said...

DI: LMAO!!! I never thought of trying that! No help there? Might be time to call in the big guns..better ask St. Anthony for help! :)

sacBarb said...

Di, good advice from Zona. Just keep praying, "Anthony, Anthony, look around, something's lost and can't be found."

Mary/MI said...

You guys are so funny today!!
Loved Barb's St Anthony chant!!

Jody, you need not have worried about the Lions...just nasty!! Sorry, but I am a Bears and Bronco fan....had to sneak that in for Dianne ;-)

Zona, glad you like his song.

LynnD, I went to Lansing for some last minute shopping. I'm not done, just have to send stuff off in the mail.

Tomorrow I may be in jail so get the bail money ready lol! I will be marching to the state Capital to protest our Governor's signing the "Right to Work bill". They are expecting 10,000 marchers! Last week was a small march and a few got rowdy and got pepper sprayed.

Off to FB then to my treadmill....

Dianne/Denver said...

Yea Mary is a Bronco fan!!!!

Mary, don't get arrested. We are trying to save the bail money for when you are all in Hawaii!!! We don't have that much so behave. I'll be watching the news for you tomorrow night. Put a rose in your mouth.

Zona, are you sure I didn't accidentally send you the NFL things that say Broncos and Patriots?

Just_Lin said...


Zona You look beautiful in first today. I hope you have a big kitchen, what with all the baking taking place all at the same time. I have plans for baking but still haven't done it. Funny, there's only me baking but I make enough of a mess for two or three, at least.

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Thanks for the blog. That was a cute joke. Did you find those gifts yet? Maybe you put them with the gift wrap.

Just_Lin said...

SacBarb LOL @ your St. Anthony prayer.

Just_Lin said...

Mary Here's hoping you don't get arrested or pepper sprayed. Good for you for standing up and being counted, though.

Dianne/Denver said...

I'm praying and it's not working. I ordered the three items again and it was very hard to find one that would be delivered before Christmas. I'm screwed when I find them. Well, I can at least take the WII game back.

Dianne/Denver said...

Well, I found my Wii came in the mail today about six hours after I ordered a new one. I do know for sure I'm missing the boys gifts because I know they came in August. I'm too unorganized and forgetful. Can't even blame it on drugs anymore. Dang it!!!!

Just_Lin said...

Dianne It's a little bit funny that you thought you couldn't find the WII when it wasn't even delivered yet. Like you said, you can at least return one and get your money back.

Dianne/Denver said...

12/11/12. 11:28 am I first?

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Yes, you're first. Congrats! I hope you feel as good as you look because you're looking great!

sacBarb said...

Dianne, you are the prettiest Owl today. You must thank St. Anthony, because while the Wii would have arrived anyway, you must show respect. He may have sped up the delivery so you would not continue to worry! As for the other stuff, I don't know what to say.

sacBarb said...

Waving to all the Owls. I am working at Christmas Promise today and tomorrow so I may be back late tonight. Have a good day everyone. MUAH

Dianne/Denver said... quiet today. I'm afraid to talk and maybe wake everyone up. Only four comments far. I wonder if I yodel if it will echo??

Had a late bday lunch with a friend today, finished up a few new address Christmas cards and did a few things around here...very few.

Barb, let us know how your day goes. How many days do you work there?

Nothing else to tell you. Louis has to drive three hours in the mtns tomorrow for a meeting. Three hours each way. Hope the weather holds. He could have gone tonight and spent the night but its the end of the semester and he's very busy.

I'll tip toe out of here now.

sacBarb said...

Dianne, I am working only two days this week and three days next week.

Everyone must be out shopping. It hasn't been this quiet for a long time.

sacBarb said...

Mary, I'm sorry about the right to work vote today. I wonder what it takes to change the elected officials minds?

Just_Lin said...

SacBarb No shopping here. I just stayed home and worked on some housecleaning and putting up some more Christmas decorations.

I have agreed to help a neighbor's friend take care of her cats while my neighbor is in Chicago for the next 5 weeks. I just got the "lay of the land" yesterday. All I can say is OMG! I'm not sure if "hoarder" is the right term or not but she has mountains of stuff and housecleaning does not exist. When I spoke to her friend she tells me the only reason there are pathways in that house is because the she requested that there be some.

Jodi said...

DIANNE - So cute!! Definitely had a very large Catholic family that lived down the street. 14 kids!!! Thank God I'm Lutheran ;)

Jodi said...

ZONA - You were the first one I thought of...candles and all. I know you believe in the power of the candle ♥

Jodi said...

LYNN - Can't wait to see pics of your new color. It's gonna b fabulous!!

Jodi said...

BARB - Waving a wing back atcha ♥

Jodi said...

MARY - I just assumed you were a Lions fan. Too bad the Vikings took the Bears down....NOT!!! Going to b quite the game on Sunday. BRING IT!!!

Jodi said...

A crazy couple of days at work, so I apologize for not showing up til now. Yesterday was going to b my last 5am day til after Christina's surgery today, but she asked me to open. She has been in a lot of pain and can't take any pain meds prior to surgery. (she is having bunions on both feet fixed today). Then I had to sit in a safety meeting for 2 1/2 hours yesterday afternoon. OY!!! Praying I don't kill the girl that is filling in for her ;) ZONA do you have a candle for that?!!?

Jodi said...

Time to get "prettied" up for work!! Thankfully it will b a short day today (God forbid I get any overtime)!!!

Gloria said...

Thank you for the warm welcomes everyone.

Tina: I did not mean to make you cry, I just was touched by you beyond words. You are a diamond in the sky!! Michael was blessed!

Whabbear...I know your intentions were good when I asked you to relay a message. You are just a wild bear in demand!!!

Had a set back health wise *thanks to the flu shots this year that do not protect you and just got out of the hospital with pneumonia. (I have major lung/heart problems, not what I needed at this time)

Loved the Irish Birth Control posting... I copied it to my FB page.

Just_Lin said...

Gloria Good morning! As is our tradition, the first one in the nest is the prettiest and I do believe that is you. Congrats on being the beauty of the day! Sorry you have been ill but glad you ar out of the hospital. Here's hoping you have a healthy and happy holiday season and new year.

Dianne/Denver said...

Good Morning's everyone doing today. Getting your shopping done?

I keep getting things in the mail so I'm going to have to do some of my own wrapping....dang it! Still haven't found my two lost gifts. I've about given up.

Gloria, I'm so sorry you've been so sick. That pneumonia is nothing to mess around with..glad they put you in hospital to treat you and hope you're on the road to recovery.

Jodi, be strong and no killing over the holidays--it just would be wrong. Sooooo smile and make her a cup of coffee.

Barb, you are a busy lady. Do you have everything done for the holidays?

JL, oh, good luck going in that house. I could not stand to live like that. What happens when that person dies and all that mess is left for someone? I'd be embarrassed for you to come in and feed the cats. Well, at least there probably aren't any rats!!

Meeting a friend for lunch today then going to pt. Since Louis is out of town. I might get the urge to wrap....might.

I need to find a jack in the box---tacos (max 6) for 12 cents each today. Now that's a deal!!

Just_Lin said...

Dianne I think my neighbor waited until the last minute to show me around because she is embarrassed. Did I tell you she's a retired nurse?

Hope you have an enjoyable lunch and visit with your friend today.

Just_Lin said...

Where is everyone? Shopping? Wrapping? Baking? None of the above? I'm sitting here waiting for my son to arrive so I can sign some papers for him. I was out and about earlier. My hands won't warm up.

Jodi said...

Another busy, long day!! Worked, had lunch with Aunt Jane, delivered an orchid to a co-worker that had surgery last week, then picked Sam up from work.

Jodi said...

Waving a wing at everyone!! Good night!!

Jodi said...

DIANNE - Yeah, I'll give her some coffee ;) She's truly not worth it, though!!

sacBarb said...

Home from Christmas Promise and it was a very busy day. The 20-30 Club adopted six families and brought in all the gifts today. Plus, we had to wrap a ton of sleeping bags and toiletries for the Moms and Dads. I am supposed to out to dinner with the Weight Management Class, but I am too tired.

J/L, Technically, I think I am the prettiest today because my post was at 1:18am, even though it was est. ;-)

Gloria, Sorry you were ill. I hope you are fully recovered.

Dianne, Those presents will keep bugging you until you find them. I hope that is soon.

Zona said...

Hi Guys!!

GLORIA: Good to see you again..hope you'll be feeling better soon!

DI: I have an idea..tell those gifts you don't care where the heck they are..they can stay there you find them tomorrow.. ;)

J/LIN: I'm making chicken soup and home made noodles for Randy for dinner tonight. We are supposed to get a major storm from up your I thought it would be a good time to make soup. Our weather guessers aren't very accurate tho'..hence the we'll see..

Truthfully..I'm still debating on whether or not to make the noodles..I have 3 bags of just throw in the water ones here..and they are making me re-think my original plans..hmmmm..what to do..what to do...

BARB: You are gorgeous whether you're first, second, third or fourth..js... :)

JODI: I truly do believe the candles work..I think that may be half the battle.. :)

To noodle or not to noodle..that is the question..... ;D

Zona said...

MO: I forgot Nikki again!! She was not too happy..I told her that's what she gets for always insisiting on going out when the phone rings!! :D

Just_Lin said...

HOdi You sure did have a busy day. It was nice of you to take the orchid to your co-worker. Sweet dreams!

Just_Lin said...

SacBarb Sounds like you had a busy day, too. It is such a nice thing you do with the Christmas Promise. I'm sorry you are too tired to join your class for dinner, though.

Just_Lin said...

Zona I say use the noodles in the bag. That's why you've got make life easier. :) The soup will still be delicious.

Dianne/Denver said...

Zona....noodles noodles....which ones did you use. The chicken noodle soup I make already has them in the can. You should try it...I think it's a new thing on the market. :)

JL..thanks, had a nice long lunch with my friend and then off to pt and JIB for my taco dinner I "fixed" Louis. I'm such a sweet wife.

Barb, sounds like you really had a busy day. Wrapping sleeping bags sounds like a hard job to me. Sorry you missed your dinner out but if you're pooped you're pooped.

Awww heck....we are all pretty today....that's how I vote.

I'm finally getting my leg stretching machine tomorrow. It's been on order since Thanksgiving. Hopefully, it will get my leg straighter.

JL, a retired nurse. You'd think she would know better just for health reasons.

sacBarb said...

Dianne, I used one of those machines too and forgot about it until you just mentioned it. I had it set up on the bed in the spare bedroom so I didn't have to keep moving it. It gave me an excuse to stay in bed and watch TV or read. I had to use it three times a day for 30 minutes each time, but one time I fell asleep. I think I slept for about an hour.

Zona, did you go with the package noodle? Either way, I bet the soup is delish. Do you need to make some Nikki ice cream to make it up to her?

J/L, your neighbor's house sounds like my sister's. Every time I talk to her she says she's cleaning, but I've never seen any evidence of it.

Just_Lin said...

I made a big pan of fudge tonight. It's cooling now. I sectioned off a part with aluminum foil because I'll send that part to my brother. He doesn't want to eat a lot of nuts and I love nuts in it so his section will have a few pieces with nuts and the rest without. I got to lick the spoon and pan. :)

Gloria said...

J/Lin....thanks for the prettest comment but if you could see me now. I have not made it upstairs to get in the shower...sponge baths just do not cut it.

I love this "Owl" effect on me... I am on steroids which cause insominia so while all you Night Owls are sleeping...I am holding down the tree branch.. My Owl name should be Bobble Head...the meds cause the jitters...

Just_Lin said...

Gloria We used to be up and more active late at night later but we are slowing down. I'm going to turn in now. I hope you are able to get some rest tonight.

Just_Lin said...

Sweet dreams, HOoters!

Just_Lin said...

I should really proof read. LOL