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Thursday, June 9, 2011

The Joys of Aging

by Michael
Sixty's Hits Are Being Revised..

Some of the artists of the 60 ' s are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers who can remember doing the "Limbo" as if it were yesterday.  Seems as though I know them all!
They include:

Bobby Darin ---
Splish, Splash, I Was Havin ' A Flash


Herman ' s Hermits ---
Mrs. Brown, You ' ve Got a Lovely Walker

Ringo Starr ---
I Get By With A Little Help From Depends


The Bee Gees -- -
How Can You Mend A Broken Hip?

Roberta Flack---
The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face

Johnny Nash ---
I Can ' t See Clearly Now.

Paul Simon---
Fifty Ways To Lose Your Liver

The Commodores ---
Once, Twice, Three Times To The Bathroom

Procol Harem---
A Whiter Shade Of Hair?

Leo Sayer --- 
You Make Me Feel Like Napping

The Temptations ---  
Papa '  Got A Kidney Stone

Abba---
Denture Queen
 

Tony Orlando ---
Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall

Helen Reddy ---
I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore

Leslie Gore---
It ' s My Procedure,
 and I ' ll Cry If I Want To

And Last but NOT least...

Willie Nelson ---

On the Commode Again

52 comments:

Unknown said...

En primer lugar!

Bebbilane said...

Awww...almost had it..lol

Bebbilane said...

poo Michael, those were very funny. Didn't you know it's tacky to be first on your own blog? That is the standard rule, I read it right in the handbook that YOU issued to me when my application was approved...by YOU. uhumm...

Bebbilane said...

tacky is as tacky does!

Bebbilane said...

I think Tina's bad habits are rubbing off on you! :)

iteach said...

Michael, I was surprised at how many of those titles I knew, since I wasn't born in the 60's. :)

Have a great day everyone!

Bebbilane said...

When I said "poo" I meant it because I didn't get first... then switched to another thougth about how funny those were and then back to teasing Michael about being first...so as not to confuse anyone or to confuse you further. :)

I was basically disgruntled because I just missed first so therefore, I went on the attack and had to be a little aggressive in my teasing Michael about being first. I didn't even mention about him speaking spanish! :) he he Love ya Michael.. you know I was teasing, I hope.

Bebbilane said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
goldie said...

Good Morning Hooters!

Funny blog Michael,but it would be funnier if so may didn't apply to me! :)

Good morning Bebbi and flapping a wing at everyone who comes in!

Bebbilane said...

Good morning Iteach, Goldie and Tink! :)

Tinka said...

Before I say "Good Morning" I just have to say that I have not read most of area 51. I came back to the blog after checking my farms to see jokes about Our Queen. Now I don't think most of Americans realize the strong connection that English Canadians, and I think particularly in Victoria, that we have with Queen Elizabeth and the rest of the Royal Family. We DON'T make jokes or laugh at jokes about Our Queen. "And that is all I am going to say about that" Quote from Forest Gump.

Tinka said...

Good Morning Michael. I love your blog today. I know all of those songs, at least the original titles, and I love them. They bring back such happy memories.

Tinka said...

Good Morning Bebbi - I always love to see your happy beautiful face in the morning. Since you both blogged in at 9:39 I do believe you were tied with first. (I guess I should delete that and say) "Congrats on being first Michael". I know how upset he can get when we don't acknowledge that he is #1. I did say "Good Morning" to you first Michael. Does that count?

Bebbilane said...

Michael: Way to go on Number ONE , NUmero Uno..por favor! gracias amigas...

Yes, Tink, I did forget that he doesn't like it when we don't acknowledge his absolutely stunning beauty when he is #1 for the day... Kudos Michael..I'm jealoussssssss.....

Tinka said...

Good Morning Goldie - You are far too young to have any of those titles refer to you. You are still a baby. Now those that apply to me, however, that's another story. I just read them again Michael and they really are very funny. I guess it's my age but the first time I read them I actually saw the original titles. I hope that is because I was reading quickly and not because senility is creeping in.

Tinka said...

I was interrupted. Jack just phoned and his ferry is arriving in Vancouver.

Good Morning Iteach. I think a lot of those songs stayed around a long time. Wow, you are younger than my kids. Two were born in the 60's and one in 1970. It does seem like yesterday.

Off to my farms. Have a great day as always.

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

Does anyone know the couple in my avatar?

Please submit your guesses! Bebbi...if u have ur foot out of your mouth yet you can have ur say too!
lol...

Tinka I love the royal family...well 3 of them anyway...the queen..Wills and Harry..

and you have to admit J/L's comment about keeping a firm grip on ones handbag while on ones hands and knees was very funny...

But honestly...when you look at the queens 59 year reign...there is not a flaw...not a single scandal...it reminds me of a line from the movie "The Queen"...when Tony Blair...in the queens defense of people complaining that they didn't like her approach to honoring Diana upon her death.....

he spoke of the queens flawless reign and referred to Diana as someone who tried to tear it all down...and although Diana was loved the world over and by me.....she clearly was not cut from the same cloth as QE2....

In a late night conversation with the queen one night she was bemoaning her brood.....her remark was...

"you can dress them up DeeDee but you can't take them anywhere!"

Unknown said...

btw...whoever guess the couple in my avatar wins a trip for 2 to a "weiner roast" in eastern Arizona!!

iteach said...

Elizabeth and John Edwards

Zona said...

Good Morning!

MICHAEL: Helllo Gorgeous! My faves..I Can't See Clearly Now..and First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face..though the latter should include..and your name..and where I know you from.. ;D

ITEACH: I wasn't born in the 60's either..lol..

Good Morning TINKA, BEBBI and GOLDIE!

Gonna be a hot day today..but at least the winds are supposed to die down..maybe they'll be able to get a handle on the fire in the White Mountains..it's beautiful country there and it's just so sad to watch it all burn.

Have a good day everyone..be good..or good at it! :)

Unknown said...

Hi Zonita!!

Iteach!! Very good!! It is the Edwards!!

Well you and your coat hanger are on your way to E. Arizona to roast wieners. I think I know just which wiener you would like to roast so take advantage of the opportunity!!!

Is John Edwards good looking or what!? Kinda like that guy you were married to..."whats his name"? Dean?

Guess the moral of the story here is that when they are so good looking you may as well just go ahead and roast the wienie....before they try to kill you with it.... emotionally I mean...

Tinka said...

Michael - I was going to ask you about your avatar and I forgot. Good for you Iteach.

No Michael, not even jokes about handbags. Thank you for saying some nice things about our Queen. People criticize the Royal Family for the money they have and spend but they bring millions in tourist dollars to London. The people are in bad enough shape economically. It is wasn't for their tourist attraction they would be even more worse off than they are today. By the way I loved Dianna too. She added a lot to the whole story.

Tinka said...

Good Morning Zona - Send us some heat. It is very cool here this morning. I put the heater on as my hands were freezing.

Today is my water therapy day but I am staying home because of my cold. That's my story and I am sticking to it. So call me.

Tina~in_ut said...

Good Moaning!~

Miguelito~ congrats on ugliest~ very funny blog today.....thanks for sending it and not changing ur mind about it! :)~

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Afternoon Owls!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael Michael...do I have your attention now? Congrats on 1st!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

I am wayyyyyyyyy too young to know any of these songs!

Just_Lin said...

Michael Congrats on being first today. You look mah-valous. Thanks for the blog, too. Of course I remember all of the original songs and can relate to several of them. Personally, I think the title of Denture Queen should go to me.

Just_Lin said...

Bebbi I think I missed out on getting a handbook.

Just_Lin said...

Tinka I hope your cold is only a mild one. Also, sorry we upset you with the Queen jokes.

Just_Lin said...

iteach I'm old enough to be your mother.

Just_Lin said...

Goldie Well, when I flap a wing, I really flap a wing. kwim?

Just_Lin said...

Zona That fire in Arizona is so terrible. I just read that it has burned 600 square miles.

Just_Lin said...

Tina It's still moaning here, so good moaning.

Unknown said...

well I am 54 and I know all of them......matter of fact can't seem to get Willie out of my head...
"on the commode again...just can't wait to get on the pot again...the life I love is making music with my friends...
And I can't wait to get on the terlit again....

I am reminded of Judy Tenuta....very funny comedienne that played the accordion...she said she met Charlton Heston once at an awards show...he played Moses u know...and that he told her that he also plays the accordion...

and Judy said..."Right! Moses had a squeeze box...Egypt couldn't sleep at night!"

Just_Lin said...

Shirley Please keep it down. I haven't had my second cup of coffee, yet.

Just_Lin said...

Michael I remember Judy Tenuta. Wonder what happened to her.

Bebbilane said...

J/L! You mean I was the only one that had to fill out an application, sign away my first born son and do a drug test? Sheesh... Michael: I would like to have a talk with you about this discovery! :) he he I got the handbook after the complete cavity search...sheesh. I guess DeeDee must have felt like I deserved it after that! Yikes.

Bebbilane said...

Tinka: That's probably why you couldn't view the video yesterday in Canada.

Unknown said...

J/L...

She is still performing. She is my age...54...she looks great...she has a website at Judytenuta.com....


trying to stay out of Bebbi's line of fire...

sacBarb said...

Michael, Congrats on first and thanks for this blog. LOL @ the 'weiner roast' I remember Judy Tenuta too. She was/is very funny. BTW, I agree with Goldie, too, that these titles would be a lot funnier if they all weren't so true.

sacBarb said...

Bebbi, I thought of you the other day when I was watching a shoe titled 'How Do They Do It?' They showed how a UPS package goes from the sender and to the destination. It was very interesting.

Bebbilane said...

yeah..you better watch yourself Mr. Michael...he he. :)

sacBarb said...

Iteach & Zona, I wasn't born in the 60's either! :)

sacBarb said...

I just got back from another physical therapy session and I feel really good. This will last about another hour before all the muscles tighten up again. :(

Waving a floppy wing to all the Owls. I hope you are all having a very good day. ♥

sacBarb said...

50 just for the hell of it.

Unknown said...

one of Judy's best lines was...

"My Mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate"...

I said... JUST WAIT!!

Lynn D said...

There is no joy in aging. They don't even let get to the cranky old woman stage anymore. It really sucks. :)

iteach said...

Mr. Michael,

I prefer to call him "He that shall not be named". :) :)

Dianne/Denver said...

Evening Friends....

MICHAEL: Funny blog and I love the Willie Nelson one the best....maybe I relate!

I have been MIA for a few days trying to learn my new phone. It is taking up a lot of my time...well not really learning all the time but I have now learned how to play some games on it. When Louis starts complaining that he has to do the laundry or fix dinner.....I will "gently" remind him that it was his idea for me to get this phone and interact with family and friends on games!!!

GOLDIE: I loved your blog about JODI and her dad. You are a great friend and so is she. You are lucky you live so close to each other.

Guess I will go to bed and see what I can learn new tonight..........on the phone....ha ha

whabbear said...

Dianne, I have a new phone too! iPhone 4... and I love it! I went out last night and splurged on new Bose QC-15 noise cancellation headphones so I could enjoy music from the iPod app while out walking today. It was fabulous!

Michael: For some reason, How can you mend a broken hip made me LOL!

And... to you and Tink... I love QE2 as well! Two people who have met her could pick me out of a lineup... my Dad, and astronaut Nick Patrick!

It sure would be fascinating to interview her, which will never happen. I'd die to know what she really thinks of all the fascinating historical figures that she interacted with. Her grandparents, her parents... all her uncles... her sister... the Kennedys... Wallace... Winston Churchill... Maggie... oh, the list is endless!

But sadly, we'll never know!