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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Redneck Medical Terms

by Shirley

 Artery......................The study of paintings.
 Benign......................What you be after you be eight.
 Bacteria....................Back door to cafeteria.
 Barium......................What doctors do when patients die.
 Cesarean Section............A neighborhood in Rome.
 Catscan.....................Searching for Kitty.
 Cauterize...................Made eye contact with her.
 Colic.......................A sheep dog.
 Coma........................A punctuation mark.
 D&C.........................Where Washington is.
 Dilate......................To live long.
 Enema.......................Not a friend.
 Fester......................Quicker than someone else.
 Fibula......................A small lie.
 Genital.....................Non-Jewish person.
 G.I.Series..................World Series of military baseball.
 Hangnail....................What you hang your coat on.
 Impotent....................Distinguished… well known.
 Labor Pain..................Getting hurt at work.
 Medical Staff...............A Doctor's cane.
 Morbid......................A higher offer than I bid.
 Nitrates....................Cheaper than day rates.
 Node........................I knew it.
 Outpatient..................A person who has fainted.
 Pap Smear...................A fatherhood test.
 Pelvis......................Second cousin to Elvis.
 Post Operative..............A letter carrier.
 Recovery Room...............Place to do upholstery.
 Rectum......................Darn near killed him.
 Secretion...................Hiding something
 Seizure.....................Roman emperor.
 Tablet......................A small table.
 Terminal Illness............Getting sick at the airport.
 Tumor.......................More than one.
 Urine.......................Opposite of you're out
 Varicose....................Near by

24 comments:

Lynn D said...

Wow Hey diddle diddle!

Lynn D said...

Shirley some of those are so funny!

Tina I have been on Pintrest. I found a fun place to get ideas.

Sacbarb it is so great to see you posting! Wahoo!

Shirley since I started seeing my new doctor for my hormones and thyroid. I have to say my anxiety has dropped quite a bit. I hope you find something that works for you soon. It is so hard to function when the anxiety hits.

Michael said...

Good morning Lynn!


I like the terminal illness at the airport...lol

Zona said...

Good Morning!

SHIRLEY: I liked Fibula and Tablet..and Varicose..funny stuff..thanks for the laughs today! :)

LYNN: Beautiful diddling this morning! ;D

MICHAEL: JFK Jr?

Rushing to get breakfast made and lunch packed..should have done that before checking out Pinterest!! :/

Have a good day everyone!

Tinka said...

Good Morning Lynn - Congrats on being first. You are up really early. Glad you are feeling better.

Good Morning Shirley - I love redneck jokes.

Good Morning Michael - I love JFK Jr. I wonder if he would have become president?

Good Morning Zona - I am rushing today too. It's cleaning lady day.

Happy Tuesday one and all.

sacBarb said...

Good Morning Owls.

Lynn, diddling back at ya.

Shirley, Since I was married to an Okie those phrases are very familiar to me. Another meaning for urine is: not our-in.

Michael, I hope I can be ready for fleet week.

Zona, I wish we had some of your AZ heat today. I am having trouble staying warm.

Good morning Tinka.

Have a good day everyone. BBL

Michael said...

Hi Barb..Z and Tinka...

I hope you'll be ready sooner than that Barb...we may need a couple of practice runs...

Yes Zona....JFK Jr...He was kind of our Princess Diana...without the baggage....

Tinka...whenever I see his picture I stop and think about him...and I like to think he would have become president...but he was pretty amazing in his own way...

Its hard to take that his Father...Bobby...and he are gone...

Michael said...

"I'd Rather Be On A Ship With A Drink On The Rocks, Than In The Drink With A Ship On The Rocks."


overheard aboard the Costa Concordia...

Tina~in_ut said...

Good Moaning~

It's been a devil of a day~ i love this, Shirley~ It looks familiar~ Thanks for sending it~

LynnD~ who u diddling?~

Michael~ u look incredibly dapper today~

Zona~ got joke?~

Tinka~ I love when ur cleaning lady comes~ i wanna borrow her~

Sackie~ hope ur ready for fleet week.....glad ur gittin' around~ Hi to Chad and thanks to him for the updates~

Tinka said...

10

Tinka said...

SacBarb - I love to see you posting again. You must be feeling better. Have you tried a hot bath? I find sometimes the only way to get warm is with hot water. Blankets don't seem to do the trick. I would send you my Hot Tub but I think the postage might be out of my price range.

Tinka said...

Michael - I think of John Jr too when I see his picture. He was so handsome. That was another day I will always remember and that was watching TV for hours hoping they would find him alive. It just wasn't believable that he could be gone.

Tinka said...

Tina - I will tell my cleaning lady to make a stop at your house before she goes home. Let me know when she arrives.

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Splat!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Sorry Tina, I never thought when I sent this to you that it may have been a repeat blog.

Glad you guys got a chuckle from them anyway!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Thanks Lynn D.

sacBarb said...

Tinka, I am restricted to a 5-7 minute warm shower for at least a couple more weeks. I have an electric blanket that I think might help a lot.

Dianne/Denver said...

test

Michael said...

OMG!! We are having a test! I haven't studied!! Whats it on!!

A POP TEST!!

Tina~in_ut said...

dork....it's a pop quiz.....tests are popped!!!! ga!!!~

Dianne/Denver said...

Pencils ready---go

Just_Lin said...

A test? No fair! I didn't even get to study.

Michael said...

Tina...lean in...I'll give you a pop...

Sir sheamus said...

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