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Friday, May 25, 2012

~ 24 Hours to Live ~

by Tina~in_ut

Morris returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him that he has only 24 hours to live. 

Given the prognosis, Morris asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, so they make love.

About 6 hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, “Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?”

Of course, the wife agrees, and they do it again.

Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes that he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife’s shoulder and asks, “Honey, please… just one more time before I die.”

She says, “Of course, Dear,” and they make love for the third time.

After this session, the wife rolls over and falls asleep.

Morris, however, worried about his impending death, tosses and turns, until he’s down to 4 more hours.

He taps his wife, who rouses. “Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could…”

At this point the wife sits up and says, “Listen Morris, enough is enough. I have to get up in the morning… you don’t.”

19 comments:

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Splat!!!

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

Ha! Ha! LOL!!! That was funny Tina!! Thanks for the morning chuckle!!

Dianne/Denver said...

Tina--that was funny. Never heard that one before today.

Good morning Shirley. I love seeing your sunshine again as I could use a little bit of that right now.

Vent following----Louis is much worse. He is not getting any better. He is in true agony with his pain. I have a call in this am to the dr but haven't heard back yet. He refuses to go to er since we just went to dr on wed. He is worse than wed.
To be honest I don't think all this stress and worry over Louis is helping these damn shingles. The pain from them is really painful. It is so close to my eye. My main objective is to get Louis better. We expect surgery pain but this has been a crazy two weeks with his pain. He's onto much med and now they r taking him off some when the pain is worse
I'm sorry to tell my tale of woe but I just needed to yak to someone so thanks a lot for listening. As Louis says this to shall pass --ha!!

Just_Lin said...

Shirley Congrats on being first and prettiest today. How are you doing up there these days?

Just_Lin said...

Tina That was funny! Thanks for the blog today.

Just_Lin said...

Dianne Vent in here anytime you need to. This is just hideous that his pain is so much worse and not better. I would be getting really angry about now. And, yes, the stress of this is definitely affecting your shingles and probably caused it in the first place.

Dianne/Denver said...

Went to the hospital for X-rays and then to the dr. Finally got to see the surgeon. They have upped the meds and now have him on a muscle relaxer too. It was quite an emotional and painful visit. Hopefully, this will help.

Thanks JL for letting me vent. I thought it might be okay. It looks like I've kept everyone off the blog today.

Shirley(NCC-1701) said...

You haven't kept me off the blog. Go ahead and vent, and if you want to hit anyone I volunteer Tina! Go ahead and smack her!! I hope this makes you feel better!!

Dianne/Denver said...

I can't find Tina or anyone to smack. I think I will just go in refrig and get an old jello shot---thank u very much

sacBarb said...

Dianne, I hope the new meds give Louis some relief. Still praying for both of you. And don't worry about venting here. We are very good listeners. I'll even stock the refrig with more jello shots. Do you have meds for the shingles?

sacBarb said...

Tina, funny blog. I did not expect that ending.

Shirley, hello sunshine. You are the prettiest today.

J/L, Did this rain we had today come from your way? And in Tahoe it was 85 yesterday and it snowed today. WTH?

sacBarb said...

I determined that it is my computer that has FB and Castleville acting up. Guess I need to call the Geek.

Good night and sweet dreams everyone.

Zona said...

Hi Guys!

TINA: Good joke to end a long hot day..it made me laugh..the joke..not the day.. ;)

SHIRLEY: I'm sure TINA feels very honored that you volunteered her to get smacked.. ;)

DI: Prayers on top of prayers that this new combination of meds will help..and that you'll get some relief as well. Vent as much as you need to..and want to..k?

BARB: Ugh to your computer acting up..I can relate..ick to having to call the Geek..can relate to that to..I'm sure the Geek will be able to figure out what's wrong and with a tweak and a twist have it fixed in no time! :)

Zona said...

Yuck..hate being 13..so one more for the road..that long..long..road..

G'night everyone! :)

Just_Lin said...

I'm sitting here eating salt and vinegar chips (why are they so damn addicting?) and wondering why I'm not losing weight. Hmmm....

Just_Lin said...

SacBarb No rain here. It was kind of windy this morning but that calmed down to just being breezy in the afternoon.

Just_Lin said...

Dianne So did you flip out at the doctor visit? I would have at this point, I think. I hope something gets better ASAP.

Dianne/Denver said...

JL---yes, I actually did flip out at the dr visit. We had three of them in there before we left.

Just_Lin said...

Sometimes that's what it takes. Sad but true. Glad you got action, anyway, and their attention.