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Thursday, June 7, 2012

Japanese Hotel Service

by Dianne


A Canadian salesman checked into a futuristic hotel in Tokyo, Japan. Realizing he needed a haircut before the next day's meeting, he called down to the desk clerk to ask if there was a barber on the premises.
 
“'I'm afraid not, sir,” the clerk told him apologetically, “but down the hall from your room is a vending machine that should serve your purposes.” Skeptical but intrigued, the salesman located the machine, inserted $15.00, and stuck his head into the opening, at which time the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later the salesman pulled out his head and surveyed his reflection, which reflected the best haircut of his life.
 
Two feet away was another machine with a sign that read, ‘Manicures; $20.00’. “Why not?” thought the salesman. He paid the money, inserted his hands into the slot and the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later he pulled out his hands and they were perfectly manicured.
 
The next machine had a sign that read, “This Machine Provides a Service Men Need When Away from Their Wives: 50 Cents.”
 
The salesman looked both ways, put fifty cents in the machine, unzipped his fly, and with some anticipation, stuck his manhood into the opening. When the machine started buzzing, the guy let out a shriek of agony and almost passed out. Fifteen seconds later it shut off.
 
With trembling hands, the salesman was able to withdraw his tender unit, which now had a button sewn neatly on the end.

18 comments:

Michael said...

BAM!!

Michael said...

Thats funny Dianne....

Michael said...

Going to the funeral home today to pick a casket!! The first shopping I have done in months!! And get all those funeral and burial details cinched up...

Anyone else doing anything FUN?

Dianne/Denver said...

Good moring Michael. I'm glad to see you checking in today. It was strange being first at 11:30 am yesterday......and then I became second. Very quiet morning.

I'm going to lunch with my niece and the grocery store for prescriptions----not too big of a day.

I guess is important to do what you are doing today, Michael , but I don't exactly have the right words to say right now as I'm sad. That's it and I guess I need to figure out that first.

We had horrible storms last night abpnd I haven't been out yet to see the damage. I'm sure glad we have a garage. I thought the hail was coming through my roof and this storm was at 1:30 am. Very frightening. Louis slept through the whole thing..amazing what those meds do for him.

Lynn D said...

Morning Glories!

Stopping in to say hello.

Michael I am very sorry for your news. The only thing I can say is start living every minute to the fullest right now. To hell with everything else and find your happiness while you can. (((Hugs)))

Zona said...

Good Morning!

MICHAEL: Nothing much going on here..I've started swimming..so I'll be doing that..washing clothes..same old same old..

Your attitude amazes me..I know I couldn't handle what you are going through the way you are handling it..I'm guessing you might say 'What else am I going to do?'..and I get that..but I still wouldn't have your strength..not by a long shot..

DI: I'm surprised Louis slept through all that..even I could hear it..dang that was crazy!! I hope there isn't any damage to your house or property. Enjoy lunch with your niece today.. :)

Zona said...

Good Morning LYNN..I hope you have sunshine today..and that you find time to paint.. :)

Zona said...

DI: Well..DUH..forgot to comment on your joke..I thought it was funny..in a YIKES! OUCH! Cringey kinda way.. ;)

I know I know..cringey isn't a word..but it fits..

Just_Lin said...

Michael I hope you don't have to try anythng on.

PARENTHESIS

Just_Lin said...

Dianne I guess it's a good thing that machine didn't fix stuck zippers. LOL

I'm sorry you were unsettled by your weather last night. At least you were on the ground and not in an airplane. Can you imagine? Yikes!

Just_Lin said...

LynnD Hello back at ya!

Just_Lin said...

Zona Waving at you! It kind of sounded like you were going to wash clothes in the pool while swimming. Funny image: you swimming with a trail of clothes dragging behind you. LOL

Michael said...

J/L...LMAO!!

Maureen said...

Good evening feathered friends!

DIANNE...OUCH! I guess if he looks for a hole, he needs a button!

MICHAEL...did you a gold fabric lined casket? One that SHIRLEY can bedazzle?
Seriously, that had to be one hard thing to do. I'm sorry you have to do that.

Waving at everyone

Just_Lin said...

Michael I was hoping to make you laugh. :)

Just_Lin said...

MO I bet my granddaughter would love to have a Bedazzler but she would bedazzle EVERYTHING.

Dianne/Denver said...

Thanks for the comments. I thought this was pretty funny.

If I'm not mistaken, I think Tina could use some blogs everyone. If envy one would writ or find a couple that would feel up a couple was weeks----just mentioning it.

Dianne/Denver said...

Ok. Correction-----if everyone would write or find a couple that would FILL up a couple of weeks It would be nice. Thanks