By Mary
My husband was raised in a one room two story cabin. His Father died very young of an aneurysm from a fall while trapping beaver, fox etc. He left 5 sons and 2 daughters. My hubby was 17 months old when he died and had a younger brother. They younger brother was eventually adopted by an Uncle. Life was very hard for them in the Michigan Upper Peninsula. His Mother moved to Lower Michigan to look for work. She worked at a clothing shop until cancer took her when hubby was 17. All 7 grew up to be fine hard working adults. Here in lies the differences in our families… They all are tighter than tight! They don’t give or do for others anymore than they have to. An example is my hubby, our snow plow was down for repairs this week so our driveway was impassible. Our neighbor cleared us out without our even asking. My Hubby will plow our drive, & not even notice that our neighbor across the road is drifted shut! I will say something to him and he just shrugs his shoulders. It just doesn’t occur to him that others could use the help! The same thing when he mows. I sometimes shame him into helping lol! There are many others, but my point is how two families basically grew up in the same type of back ground but turned out so different.
Of course the upside is that they are all living very comfortable lives and will no doubt leave a bit of dough lol!
I am curious about your partners and the way they were raised, how it affects your relationships/lives.
55 comments:
pretty~
Cheater!
Tina. Sorry but it is too early for me to think you are pretty. I'm going back to bed.
wow mary~ My mom is 1st gen American..............grandparents from messy-co~ Hubby's fam is from Nebraska~ When we were dating, the more we talked, the more similarities we found...down to the roast beef dinner every Sunday night! (of course, the rest of the week was totally different....his mom doesn't do messy-can!) Although he grew up "white" and I grew up "brown", (that's what I tell him!), there really aren't that many differences~ :D
and just HOW is that cheating? My alarm has been going off for 20 minutes....and I just decided to get my butt outta bed at 6:57....and there was no new blog.......so I've been refreshing....isn't that how it works?~
oh...and in between refreshing....I got myself another mingo~ ....thanks LynnD~
We'll I'll be damned! I had this ready to get the first spot but it began to pour rain and I had left Belle outside.....
oh well.....good morning J/L! Long time no see......
Tina.. (greets & nods suspiciously)
Tina, you are prettiest, but Just_Lin barely missed it. Congrats to you both.
Mary, I'm surprised that hub is so different from you. Some people don't mean to be selfish, they truly don't see that others might need some help.
Sorry, DeeDee... didn't see you there. Good morning to you! I wouldn't let Tina near Belle. She'll shave her and give her tattoos or something.
Morning Glories!
Oh Crap Tina got first. I was maintaining my Island as I did not feel well last night. Realized that the vultures....er I mean my friends were very busy stripping my Island last night. Just kick a gal when she is down. Just don't kick the kidneys please. Oh and Tina distracted me by responding to a post. She is evil.
Mary Mr. Lynn D is twelve years older than me so we have some generational differences but he was raised on farms and learned very early how to make do. But at the same time you help neighbors and others when you can. Sharing.
I was raised middle class with lots of issues. LOL, But also learned from my father you help family and friends when you can. So we are both, I think very generous people. We might argue who needs the most help but we work at helping when we can.
My kids probably won't have a great inheritance, but to their credit they don't expect one.
As far as my Dad I know he won't leave much behind but as I tell him, It's his not mine he earned it and I don't expect anything.
I am amazed at how different siblings can be raised in the same families tho. Mr. Lynn D has a sister that is so different from him it is like night and day. She is the penny pincher and has no sentimental bones in her body. When we had to move his parents when his mother was so ill with alzheimers she all but stripped what little they had and then tried to burn all of the family photos!!!! First time I saw Mr. Lynn D about to choke someone. We saved the photos. Got there just in time.
He always asks "Were we raised in the same house"? Because he just can not relate to her version of growing up. Weird.
Good Morning!
MARY: Loved reading about you and Mr Mary's families. I love this kind of stuff, I really find it interesting to hear about other people's backgrounds, their heritage and how they grew up.
My mom was Russian and Lithuanian..which is actually kind of the same..unless you ask someone from Russia or Lithuania..lol. My dad was Irish and German. Both of them were second generation Americans. My mom and dad grew up middle class..but just barely. They both were born right after the Depression so they were raised really knowing the value of a dollar. Mr Z's dad was was German, his mom English. They were also raised during the Depression. Mr Z has five siblings..and at times when he was growing up, money was really tight. I only have one brother and sister..but the same was true for my family. I don't think I was ever aware that we had money problems until I was much older. My mom told me that were some weeks where there was only 50 cents left out of my dad's paycheck. I can't remember ever feeling like we didn't have everything we needed.
I think the biggest difference between the way Mr Z and I grew up is reflected in the on going relationship he has with his brothers and sisters. They have always been very close. My sister and I are close..but we haven't seen my brother in 19 years and at this point I doubt we ever will again.
Great blog today MARY..loved it!
TINA: Congrats on being so pretty..and FIRST! :D
My mom used to make roast beef every Sunday night too!
DEEDEE: Poor Belle..is she all dry and cozy now? :)
LYNN: I'm amazed how different siblings can be too..ijs. Why in the world would Mr D's sister try to burn the family photos? If she didn't want them..why didn't she give them to her brother? Very strange! I'm glad you were able to save them!
BONACHI: I really liked the video yesterday..reminded me of how I drove a long long time ago..only on city streets!
The one thing I never expected to find myself doing was being a caregiver to my mom..and for a short time..my dad. They were always so strong in my eyes..I kinda thought they were invincible. I guess I never quite let myself believe that they would get old and that our roles would change. I'm glad I had the chance to help them..just never could imagine when I was younger that one day they would need me like they did.
Lots to do today..I hope everyone has a wonderful Friday!
Sweet dreams J/L!!
Well I can't really comment because I don't have a partner....other than to say it really didn't matter with my husbands....it was my way or the highway.....
And to say that Mary wrote a thoughtful piece for today and I enjoyed reading it....
And as far as helping others goes...my parents set a good example for their children but we are all different. They are stingy and I am not.....and one of my biggest joys is helping people.
So I think we turn out to be what we are regardless.....but I have a niece who is just so tight with money that its disgusting...and my Mother always said "she didn't get that from this side of the family"....lol
But I remember her growing up....and none of her Barbies ever had nice clothes or got new clothes...she would buy "used" clothes off of her friends at deep discounts off the retail price....
If she got a new Barbie as a gift with a fancy gown....she would strip her and trade that gown to her friends for more suitable attire...I mean...since Barbi wasn't going anywhere to wear a gown.....
She even cut their hair which ended up with them all looking like they had giant hair plugs.....
Once while she was gone for the night I made hair out of cotton...gently pulling cotton balls apart and layering them on each Barbies head (one was called Midge) until it was big...I sprayed it real well with hair spray and placed a bathroom sized dixie cup on each ones head and wrapped rubber bands around the cups around the faces to make the cotton conform to their faces....the next morning I cut the rubber bands and carefully removed the dixie cups to reveal 4 perfect white beehive hairdos!!!!
When she came home and opened her Barbie case....there they all stood...perfectly coiffed.....and ya know...I don't think she even appreciated that....
So now...when ever I see that video with the singer and his identical models....I think of those Barbies...and Midge....and I can honestly say....I have even lent a helping hand to Barbi and her friends......
OMG.. There is so much snow.. I am home but trying to get work...my driveway has 11in.. wish me luck!
omg DeeDee!!!! I'm in class again.....and I can't stop laughing!!!! omg!!!!! ur so hysterical!!!!!
Wow, I am psychic. I predicted the name of this blog YESTERDAY..i freakin rock.
But Tina's prettiest today.
I can see DeeDee with Barbie dolls, but not doing their hair. More like setting them on fire.
Tina. I hope you know I was just kidding. The one day I am up early enough and I miss it by one minute!
DeeDee. Good morning and LOL @ Barbie's giant hair plugs! I used to love my Barbie. I had one of the early ones that had the exotic facial features. I used to create various up-dos on her by sticking small straight pins in her head. LOL
Bonach. When I first started working for a non-profit crime prevention program, it was in a secretarial position. A couple of years later I was doing local TV and radio public service announcements and interviews. I never saw that coming.
LynnD. I'm so frazzled, I don't recall if you are on antibiotics for your kidneys. I had a kidney infection once and it hurt like a MF.
I hate to say this but maybe something really bad happened to your SIL in her childhood that she's never dealt with.
Zona. I did have sweet dreams in a very quiet house. :)
Carol. Were you able to get out of your driveway? I hope you are very careful driving.
Bebbi. Yes, you def do rock! :)
Mary. I was brought up in a very quiet household. We would be considered middle class, I think, although there wasn't a lot of extras. We did manage to have a pool installed when I was about 13. It's almost a necessity in SoCal. My mom made all my clothes, pretty much, and they were beautiful.
My second husband was 17 years older and had a strict Englishman father. We had some differences because of that but we were both pretty easy going about most things so we were able to get along well in spite of differences. He was very outgoing and I am more reserved until I get to know people.
I have become quite the blog hog. I guess I should get out of my robe and put real clothes on. At least it isn't noon yet. LOL
Good afternoon everyone!
I forgot Carol was putting my blog up today. I have been slow at getting around today. All this snow/gloom was just dragging me down, well it was until I read Carol's comment! Dam Carol I don't feel so bad now! I can at least get out of my driveway!
I have been packing for my Florida trip and praying that their temps warm up before I get there!
I have been loving all your comments.
DeeDee,I will not leave this cruel world until I meet you! You are a nut! They only way to be!! lol!!
Tina, we had roast beef dinner every Sunday after church. My Mother would put a huge roast in the oven on low before we went to church. When we got home it was so tender!! That was when they used to leave the bone & morrow in there. I think that had a lot to do with the great flavor!
Bonachichi (can I leave one of you chi chi s out please lol). My Hubby is a gentle,honest, hard working man, so I overlook this side of him. He is a keeper lol!
Zona, You come from good stuff! I loved your comment! I remember getting a 50 cent allowance lol!
LynnD~ I flinched when you said she tried to burn the pics! The pics are such a connection to our roots and can never be replaced. I wish I had more pictures of my Grandma & Grandpa. I would love to see everyone's family photos from way back. Too bad there isn't a way to do that with out showing the world lol!
Waving madly at Justlin & Bebb!~~~~
Mary/MI, you go ahead and spell my "name" any old way you want!
This is one of those blogs that is sticking with me today. Lots of thought about how I grew up. Anyone else thinking these thoughts?
nope....I could care less how you grew up!~ :)~
maybe it's a good thing I'm not going to Japan~
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8540063.stm
Tina, quit picking on Bonachi! Go fly your broomba lol!
Tina,OMG I just said the same thing to Jim! I hope the damage is not as bad as Haiti!
Yes, Bon, lots of thoughts on Mary's blog, but I'm at work, so will post later..
Tina, I wasn't gonna TELL you how I grew up. I thought I could post it on your wall; one sentence at a time. Do-WAH!!
Mary/MI, thank you for coming to my aid but we do have to acknowledge that I can be annoying and for some reason, I take great joy in annoying Tina. Did anybody see what I did to her wall last night?
Hi everyone..
Oh my goodness.. what a day.. I don't know where to begin.. so I will get my thoughts together and brb..
Today....
Many ppl stranded.. so had to go to the office.. I could not get out of my driveway, so I had to shovel, and shovel, and shovel.. thank goodness my neighbors came to help me. I finally pull out and my car gets stuck, and stuck, and stuck, it took us a 1/2 hr to get it going.. lots of back and forth almost to point where I am getting dizzy, needless to say, I am in full blown panic attack mode by now.. my neighbor pulls me out of the car and puts herself in it, and she was able to get it unstuck.. Finally free, I feel as if I just won the lottery, so off to the office I go.. every street was not plowed, NOT FUN! I do what I have to do at the office, I leave only to forgot to put the phone nite service on, soooo I have to go back.. still no streets are plowed everything is a mess. Ppl are driving crazy, so road rage begins.. I stop @ two stores to stock up on many snacks.. by the time I got home, I looked like a menapausal drowned drunken rat!
The good news, the Italian Stallions came and shoveled the rest of the driveway.. The snacks are def doing the trick, and no accidents incurred..
Snow... it sucks!
Mary..
As all of you know I come from a very big Italian Family.. as far as I can remember I was surrounded by family, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins etc.. Everyone helped one another out all the time and still does..
Siblings are very different even if they were raised the same way. No two ppl could be more different then I and my brother.. so different we don't look alike, think alike, or act alike.. sometimes I actually wonder.. where was the milkman in all of this.. lol
Great Blog.. thanks for sharing your family..
Tina.. I saw that on the news about Japan.. but I was drowning myself in my own sorrows of dealing with 2ft of snow and never went back to it..
Is there footage out yet?
I enjoyed reading everyone's comments about their family.. I like blogs like this, cause you learn so much about everyone..
J/L..
wow you were up early! so I would say you are just as pretty as Tina today!
and J/L.. lol on it being to early for Tina to be pretty..
Zona..
We as children, never expect to have to care for our parents, we never think we are strong enough. But when the times we find the strength. And we wonder "how am I am able to do this" and the answer is simple.. The strength we find is from our parents, because as from children, they taught us to be strong when need be..
So we are..
I am going to take some aspirin and chill a bit.. and try to forget this day.....
MARY...great blog! It's so true that you don't know what you're missing if you never had it.
Up until I was 8, we lived a middle class life. Stay at home mom, latest toys...but not so many as to be spoiled...clean clothes and the weekly dinner out at The Village Inn or a pizza place. Then my dad died and left no insurance. My mom raised my brother and I on Social Security and working at a department store. We had the basics, but no more. If we went out, it was McDonalds or for a real treat...Arbys! I didn't get a bike until I was a young teen and of course it came from a garage sale as did all of our furniture. But, we were happy. We were fricking loaded in the love column!!
Life has gone full circle. Went from living an upper middle class life and in my late forties ended up like childhood...have the basics and no more. But it is better then most and I am thankful for what I do have.
Well, except for the fucking snow. I have more then enough of that to last a long, long time!!
I have one sibling and he is 8 yrs older. We basically have the same heart, but we use it differently! He is a big chicken! Scared to face things. We agree that even though I am younger, I am the "older" sibling. I have to deal with the things he won't or can't. He is very kind and generous, so we are alike in that way.
We also differ in our possessions. I can use the same thing for 20 years (my TV is from 1982!) and I keep my cars forever. He on the other hand likes to get new "toys" and a new car every couple of years.
Oh, Aunt Mary, what a neat blog!!
I will come back later with my two cents.
Hugs!!
I'm reading about all the snow you all are getting in the East. More over the weekend. I don't know how you all do it. I'd be calling the National Guard to haul my ass outta there.
I'm sorry you had a bad day, Carol... Can you be home over the weekend, or do you have to work?
Mary: I really enjoyed your blog! I am not feeling very well so I am going to go and lay down.
There is a city east of here that is smack dab in the middle of the snowbelt. They announced today they will not plow after 4 pm today until Monday. There has been so much snow this month that they are out of money to pay the drivers, so they can't plow again until Monday...March! WTF. It hasn't stopped snowing and won't until next week sometime. That is so wrong.
Carol: We have been talking all day about the weather there. I hope you be SAFE! Glad that the nephews came over and finished the shoveling.
CAROL...I couldn't get out of my garage this morning. There was so much snow that the plow piled up and then a drift that was up to my knees. At first I got stuck half in the garage and half out. I got the car back in and then had to shovel the freaking parking lot to get out. Grrrrrr and Brrrrrrrr!
I watch the news morning noon & night. I have not seen one tiny news bite on the Japan earthquake! Weird!
We have had a very busy local news week, non good. We had 2 Amber alerts. One turned out positive, the other very sad. A man confessed to "disposing" of a 2 yr old in a trash bin 4 days ago! The authorities have been going through piles of garbage at the landfill, but fear that she may have already gone through the incinerator! Lord have mercy! The Mother (man's girlfriend)has been just too robotic and crocodile tear like. I hope she is just in shock and not involved. I need to get this out of my head!
hi hi...I haven't read any comments for a few days but wanted to drop by and say hi. We have already been gone six days and tomorrow night/day is the last one. I am trying to see how I can get a job on a cruise ship...if I only knew how to play the piano!!
It has been so much fun and we have eaten and drank A LOT!!!
I have been looking fow owl things in the stores and then when I tell them I need about 20...they shit...cause they don't have 20 and want to make the sale. They have tried to sell me whales, parrots, etc., no, I say....OWLS!!!
Ok, time to go and check on MR D as he had more pina colads than I think he as ever had as he is not much of a drinker. Yesteday I got him to do a shot of tequila with me in Mexico...see what a good infuluence I am...Hey TINA, are you sure you want to room with me??
Night....all my owl friends
MARY - Great blog!! Brought up great memories of growing up...especially Sunday roast beef!! My Dad was born during The Depression, and boy that is just how his family lived. Hung onto their money like their life depended on it. It is sad really, because my Grandparents could've done so much more traveling and enjoying their life. My Mom was born during WWII and the first of 5 kids. My Grandpa was first generation Norwegian American. He owned and operated his own slaughter house/meat market...the only problem was that when he died at the age of 51, my Grandma had nothing but the farm and the real estate that was the business. Grandpa, being self employed, didn't believe in life insurance or putting away for any kind of emergencies.
Jacob and I visited my Grandma yesterday morning. It is best to visit her before Hospice comes to change her wound dressings. This is when she is the most coherent. It upset Jacob to see his Great Grandma in such a weakened state, and he couldn't understand a word that she was trying to tell him. We didn't stay long but Grandma did tell me that she loved me...and that was a HUGE gift!!!
I hope everyone has a great Saturday. I work all weekend, but will try to stop by after work today. ♥♥♥
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