by EBJ
He said to me . ... . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it
I said to him .... . . You wear pants don't you?
He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.
He said....What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said. . . A widow.
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him .. . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
He said to me. ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him . ..... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him .. .. I don't know; it has never happened.
He said to me ... . ......... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said . That's a good idea - you stand by the stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing but fart
25 comments:
Good Moaning~
EBJ~ I can't decide which one of these is my favorite:
He said to me . ... . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it
I said to him .... . . You wear pants don't you?
or
He said to me. ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him . ..... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
Love them both! :D
Happy Birthday Goldie girl~
Good Morning TinaHO! Happy 1
Goldie..
Happy Birthday
Hope your day is as special as you are..
:O)
EBJ...
LOL.. nothing but fart! :O)
These are so funny!
Mo..
Area 51.. LOL.. "TINA...how special...you think of me in the poop-a-rarium"
and to answer your questions..
yes she does, she told me soo.....
BTW Mo.. how do you feel?
SSO went to the Notre Dame game this past weekend.. his friend son's is a coach for the team..
Soooooo
He is walking off the field (he had passes) in the underground part to the stadium, and there are other ppl walking as well.. the girl next to him asked him if he enjoyed the game, they have a small convo with each other, and then she told him to have a nice day.. One of the guys walking in front of him asked him if he new who the girl was that he was taking to.. SSO has no idea..
The guy says "Taylor Swift" SSO says "WHO"..
HA HA.. he had no clue.. he actually still has no clue.. and did not even tell me till he got back, cause he forgot.. OMG..
Brought my dress to the tailor this morning to get the underarms fixed.. Yikes its official.. Next Saturday!
Ok.. phones ringing.. I gotta go..
Hope everyone has a great day!
Good Morning and Moaning...
LOL @ the blog
Thanks for the birthday wishes tina~ and Carol!
Hope everyone has a good hump day!
Morning Glories!
Great morning laughs. Sadly they all apply to my life. :)
Happy Birthday Goldie!!!
Dianne I think you made the right decision. If it was causing you so much distress then do it the easiest way. (((Hugs)))
Mo hope you are feeling better and I look forward to your call.
Carol I can't believe the wedding is this Saturday! Time flies!
Need to finish on my farms. I am going out to lunch with a few friends today and I need to get Ritchie's birthday present in the mail. Have a great day everyone!
Happy Birthday GOLDIE! I hope your day is as wonderful as you are!
EBJ: I liked the one about the toilet paper..so true! Thanks for the grins this morning!
TINA: 'Grats on first!
CAROL: The wedding is next Saturday? How exciting!! I can't believe how fast this summer went by!
LYNN: Happy Birthday to Ritchie! (a little early) :)
Mr Z cleared a spot in the garage for the new washer..I actually wish the washer came with a washer..kwim? :D
Now I just have to wait for the delivery guys. woohoo!
Have a good day everyone!
EBJ. Thanks for the chuckles today.
SacBarb. Excellent eye candy yesterday. What a hoot!
Goldie. Happy Birthday! Hope you have a splendid day.
Mo. I hope you're finally over that crud.
Tina. Does all that moaning bother Janice?
LynnD. Have fun today.
Carol. That's so funny about your SSO. It's probably good that he's not too involved with pop culture. Can't believe the wedding is coming up so soon. Think you'll cry? LOL. LOL. LOL.
Zona. Yay for nre appliances.
J/L~ you just made janice spit out her water~
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GOLDIE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR MO!!
Good Afternoon to all the other owls too. I love the one about swapping places although they are all pretty true and funny. Gave me a smile today EBJ.
I just woke up at 4PM. I did nothing but lay around after home from dr yesterday and then watched tv at about midnight until late (had gotten behind on Days of Our Lives). Told MR D that I hoped I would sleep 12 hours and we laughed...I woke up to get up for the doorbell once and right back to sleep.
I received a cute card and package in the mail and am so grateful for it....more than anyone can know.
In case you didn't see it in area 51:
Happy Birthday GOLDIE!! Can't wait for our dinner tomorrow night!
MOHO - Happy Rosh Hashona!!
DIANNE - Glad you liked your package....ENJOY ♥
EBJ - He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him .. .. I don't know; it has never happened. Seriously one of my all time pet peeves!!
CAROL - Wow...can't wait to see pics from Saturday!! I'm sure it will be an emotional, but happy day!!
Evening Owls...Tina, Carol, Goldie, Lynn D, Zona, Just Lin, Dianne and Jodi!
Happy Birthday Goldie!
Glad the package cheered you up Dianne!
EBJ these were very funny! I liked the first one!
I have been watching some of the US Open, and the announcers are driving me crazy! They are fixated on the height of one of the women who is playing. They can't decide if she is 5.1, 5.2, 5.3 or maybe 5.1 and a half! Then they were fixated on the wind and how much it was blowing the other woman's hair around! Good grief people just call the match!!!
Thank you for allowing me to rant.
Hi Everyone- Thank you for all the Birthday wishes. XXOO
You are all special to me and made my day special too.
Jodi- looking forward to our dinner tomorrow night too!
Good evening or morning feathered friends!!!
Can't believe I am first flying in at 1 am!!
EBJ...great funny blog! Men sure have a skewed view of reality!!! Thanks for the chuckles!
CAROL...Saturday is the big day already? WOW! You will be stunning and remember it isn't really very nice to be more beautiful then the bride! Can't wait for the pics!
Oh, and too funny about Taylor Swift!
DIANNE...I hope you are feeling better. I'm glad you got a lot of rest and enjoyed your package!
ZONA...how's the new washer? Were the delivery men hotties??
LYNN...{{{HUGS}}}
I still have some of the crud...mostly just the cough and the desire to throw up from the said cough :)~
Thanks for the Happy New Year wishes! Was at Elaine's tonight after work. A very small turn out...the smallest ever. But, Joanne made her social debut!! She looked great and she was walking around the house without her walker!
GOLDIE...glad you had a great birthday!
Good night all my special friends.....here is something to be excited about....first full season football game on tomorrow night and a really good to at that.....Minnesota against New Orleans (like a Super Bowl rematch) and Jodi...our little Brett Favre at bat....
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