by Shirley
Denver
You may not drive a black car on Sundays.
It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.
It is illegal to mistreat rats in Denver, Colorado.
New Jersey Crazy Law
It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.
You may not slurp your soup.
Automobiles are not to pass horse drawn carriages on the street.
It is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon.
Utah Crazy Law
It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.
Birds have the right of way on all highways.
It is against the law to fish from horseback.
When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin.
It is considered an offense to hunt whales.
California Crazy Law
Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants.
Bathhouses are against the law.
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
Women may not drive in a house coat.
It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
Arizona Crazy Law
You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
Hunting camels is prohibited.
Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
78 comments:
dag nabbit woman!
haha..
If I can't have one, I will take 2,3 & 4
Geez I go to pee and bam you two are duking it out for first!
New law if you have to pee before the new blog post you automatically get first!
Yay for me!
lmbo!!!! SacBarb is going to jail! I can just see her in a housecoat!!!
I'm not going to jail cuz I'm not going to detonate my nuclear bomb~ :D
Still no free breakfast--am I first or seventh?
oh good Lynndie~ and new crazy law!
ha! Bebbi! I told you Thurs/Fri! :D
Hi Di~ ur 8th~
Morning Glories!
I am wondering why it would be illegal to drive in a housecoat? Is naked preferable? And I guess by 50 you can decide if you are mature enough to marry your cousin.
Hello I totally get the "illegal to detain a homing pigeon law" They carry the mail. Duh!
I guess I better buy chastity belts for my dogs if I ever go to California.
LMAO Thanks Shirley!
OMG!!! Zona is going to prison! Guess which law she broke?!!!~
Shirley~ that was hilarious~ Thanks for the blog!~
Morning Di, Tina and Bebbi!
Dianne I need to know does the hotel give you toilet paper or do you have to pay 10.99 for it?
Also if they have an iron in your room you could in a pinch use it to try your hair. imjs :)
Hope you have fun on your trip.
Zona had a donkey in her bathtub?
LynnD: LOL at the charge for toilet paper...
Shirley: I haven't read the blog yet, still sitting here trying to get over not being prettiest again. I am going to have to volunteer to help with putting blogs up to get first..hehe.
Good morning LynnD, Di, Tina~!
nope, Lynndie~
blip blip
Good Morning Hooters!
Hello you beautiful Ho Miss tina~
Hi Bebbi, Lynn and Di!!
Shirley-couldn't find any crazy laws in Wisconsin, just crazy people?
Good chuckle to start the morning.
Today is my HUGE inspection- I need a valium and a captain & diet and I will be just fine.............
Cross your fingers and get out the bail money!!!!
Good luck Goldie..I am sure you will be fine. :)
P..and send.
Goldie Good Luck! I know you don't need it but remember you can always blame the liberal media. It seems to work for some people. :)
OMG! The timing of this blog is uncanny!!
You won't believe this, but last night, I couldn't sleep. I got up and put on my housecoat and took my pet sloth to the tavern.
After a few drinks, I decided to stop by the bath house to cool off. Imagine my shock as I went out to my car and saw 2 whales mating!
A speeding vehicle (going at least 65mph) without a driver wizzed by and shot at the whales. Luckily they were not hit.
When I finally made it home and let MR. EBJ know about my crazy night, he just looked at me like I am nuts.
I'll bbl, waiting for the dr. to ok me to go home. :)
lmbo EBJ~ lol~
Tina, no offense, but I think your beauty is getting tedious lol!
Bebbi,it is hard to beat someone who is aiming for the first "early worm".
She has to take it when she can kwim?
LynnD,Couldn't you "hold it" just a little bit longer to be 1st? That's why they make depends lol!
Goldie, deep breaths girlfriend! You will breeze through inspection! If not I will be the first to donate towards your bail :)
EBJ, very clever ha ha!!
I for one don't mind watching a little doggie mating. It brings back fond memories of.... well never mind ;-)
I am off to clean out the basement. I thought as long as we had to rent a huge container for the patio refuse I may as well get my monies worth!
Have a great day everyone!
p.s to Bebbi, Treadmill & elip today, Motrin tonight lol!
Shirley, I forgot to say what a fun blog you put out, well you didn't exactly "put out", but fun anyway :)
I found this under Michigans dumb laws...
There is a law that makes it legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
Couples are banned from making love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple’s own property.
Willfully destroying your old radio is prohibited.
It is illegal for a man to scowl at his wife on Sunday.
"A law to reduce crime states: “It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
Here is a great one from WA state. :)
Washington Crazy Law
# It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
# All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
# People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
# You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday.
# All lollipops are banned.
# It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich.
# When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
Auburn
# Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.
Bremerton
# You may not shuck peanuts on the street.
Everett
# It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
Lynden
# Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
Seattle
# You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
# Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
# No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission.
# It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.
Spokane
# TV's may not be bought on Sundays.
Waldron Island
# No structure shall contain more than two toilets that use potable water for flushing. -San Juan County Ordinance NO. 7 -1995 (Passed June 7,1995)
Wilbur
# You may not ride an ugly horse.
LynnD, BWAHA HA HA!! Loved the "ugly horse one" lol!!
Happy Tuesday Owls.
Shirley, Thanks for the laugh this morning. Usually when a law is passed it is because something happened and the government, in all its wisdom, is trying to prevent it from happening again. I wonder though, where can you find whales to hunt in Utah?
Tina, up with the birds again. Lovely.
OK, I see we have to ante up bail money again for Zona and Goldie.
Lynn, I'm so glad no one caught me with that 7 foot weapon when we met in Seattle (which I concealed on my 5 foot frame). BTW, when I first moved to Sac, we couldn't buy meat on Sunday. I think it had more to do with the butcher's union than an actual law.
EBJ, That car you saw without a driver was really me before my car seat got fixed.
I will never admit to driving while wearing a house coat.
Shirley: LOL at the crazy laws! That was a great blog..
LynnD: more funny ones!!
Mary: WTG on getting the plan. My lunch plans were changed so I didn't get to go and work out but I have Zumba tonight and plan to head over an hour earlier to do my elliptical..
UTAH:
No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
Boxing matches that allow biting are not allowed.
It is illegal to cause a catastrophe.
Logan:
Women may not swear. (glad I don't live there!)
Monroe:
Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
Salt Lake County:
No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin.
Auctions may not be advertised by hiring trombone players to play on the street.
Tremonton:
It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper.
lmbo~
Lynn2, when you bring your dogs to CA, just keep them away from taverns, schools, and churches.
Dianne, I hope you don't drive a black car or you are grounded on Sundays.
:Note to self: Don't move to AZ:
I'm glad I could make you all laugh today. The other night on FB I read where Tina had told Bebbi to write a blog so I came up with this idea blog and sent it to Tina.
Thanks for your comments Tina (prettiest again), Bebbi (runner up), Lynn D (want-a-be), Dianne (has your hair dried yet), Goldie (did you wear clean underwear for you inspection?), EBJ (what a wild night you had!), Mary (there was no "putting out" for the making of this blog.) and SacBarb (you are welcome!)
Good morning, HOoters!
Tina I will say you are prettiest every day if you want, now that I know you are armed to the hilt! I guess that law against detonating a bomb goes right along with not causing a catastrophe. I think everyone should following that law, imho.
Bebbi You just keep getting edged out for first. When I first read your comment about, "If I can't have one..." I thought you were talking about dildos. LMAO!
LynnD I think the answer to your question is that we all look so fetching and desirable in our housecoats that men cannot control themselves and it would cause wrecks. imho lol
Dianne You'd probably be happy with that hotel if you weren't comparing it to the one in Chicago. Thank goodness the Chicago one had a hair dryer because mine croaked on the first day.
Goldie I know your inspection will go great. You'll be able to celebrate later tonight.
EBJ That was hilarious! :D
Mary LOL @ watching doggie mating.
SacBarb ROFLMAO @ not moving to AZ!!!! We better alert Jodi, too. ijs
Shirley What a fun blog today! Thank you! I do understand the animal ones as they are meant to prevent cruelty to animals. I'm pretty sure that the anti whale hunting in Utah is meant as a position of solidarity with outfits like GreenPeace.
I admit to driving my kids to school a couple of times while wearing nightgown, robe and slippers. I was worried the whole time that some cop would find a reason to pull me over and I would be so embarrassed. Fortunately, that never happened.
J/L...yes,that could go for dildos too..haha..Thats funny! :)
Hi Everyone!!
SHIRLEY: Some lawmakers sure have good imaginations..LOL!! Great blog!
TINA: You may be prettiest but I think you set me up..I never did look in that bag you left here last year..maybe it's time I did..I wouldn't want to be arrested for something you left behind. ;) :D
LYNN: Ok..for real..who hasn't put their ass in the bathtub at one time or another? ;)
DIANNE: I'm betting you hate that rat law.. ;)
GOLDIE: Everything is crossed..icy calm..the inspection will go fine! :)
SACBARB: I'm wondering how they would enforce that law..follow the buzzing? :D
MARY: Well I just don't like that anti-in the car one at all.. ;)
EBJ: LOL!! btw..I didn't know you had a pet sloth.. :D
BEBBI: How about prettiest in red? :)
J/LIN: My mom would always tell us that if we didn't behave at school she would come down and get us dressed in slippers, housecoat and with her hair in curlers...we were the best kids, just in case.. ;D
Zona: Thanks! :)
J/L, I was just Googling some CA laws and low and behold, did you know it is illegal to molest butterflies in Pacifica?
Bear, When you are in Palm Springs remember it is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM. Better stick to mornings. And did you know San Francisco prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash? Is elephant code for something else? It is SF after all!
In Glendale, one may not take a dog on an elevator with him. I guess the dog has to take the stairs or if you are a woman you can take it in the elevator.
In Fresno, no one may annoy a lizard in a city park. So, take it out of the park and annoy it on the street.
In Blythe you are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own two cows. I guess that's one cow for each boot.
Zona, LMAO I know I've has an ass or two in my bathtub.
Zona2, I thought you told me that buzzing was from locusts!
Tina, So, in Tremonton it's OK to stop the ambulance to have sex? What about the patient? Maybe they can have a 3-some.
Shirley that was a great blog today! I had to see if there were any laws that related to my city. Didn't find any. I saw a couple more funnies:
San Francisco
Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.
It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear (Bear please remember this one hee hee :)
Los Angeles
Toads may not be licked.
You may not hunt moths under a street light.
It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church. Breaking this law is punishable by a fine of $500 and/or six months in prison (do the dogs get fined and go to prison?)
You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
Kentucky:
It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky
One may not dye a duckling blue and offer it for sale unless more than six are for sale at once.
An old law on the books has never been removed that allows you to publicly hang anyone who steals your horse.
Anyone who has been drinking in the state is considered sober, until he cannot hold onto the ground.
Kentucky law requires each citizen to take a shower at least once a year.
Owensboro: A woman may not buy a hat without her husbands permission
Fort Thomas
Dogs may not molest cars.
hmmmmm....somehow....the Kentucky laws don't surprise me~ ijs~ :D
Since I am from Indiana, here are the Indiana weird laws:
Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.
No tail lights on pedestrians allowed.
Intentionally swallowing your lighter is illegal.
Warsaw, In
YOu can't throw your couch at your neighbor.
So what do you think about that? They canceled Ghost Whisperer!
Bebbi, So, there was a time when pedestrians in Indiana actually WORE tail lights and it was outlawed? Maybe it was too distracting to the drivers trying to hit them.
Must have been..haha.
The New Jersey law of no slurping your soup probably came from the original "Soup Nazi"..haha.
Tina Did you notice there were no laws about not marrying your cousin for Kentucky? imjs
You guys are cracking me up!
lmbo Lynndie~ got a point there~
And Sackie~ you are cracking me up~
DeeDee is so screwed!!
Texas:
One must acknowledge a supreme being before being able to hold public office. (they'll never acknowledge her!)
It is illegal to sell one's eye. (too late!)
Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos. (she's TOTALLY screwed....literally and figuratively)
A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
Dallas:
It’s illegal to possess realistic dildos.
San Antonio:
It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.
It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.
Thank g-d I don't live in Indiana...just swallowed my lighter...on purpose! When I visited Jersey, I always drove on the sidewalk to pass a horse drawn carriage.
I wonder if you have a camel and a donkey they can each use a dildo in AZ?
Can a man scowl at his wife on Sunday if they are in the car in their driveway making love?
Can an ugly person ride an ugly horse legally?
EBJ...ROFLMAO!
SHIRLEY...GREAT and HILARIOUS blog! Thanks for the laughs!
I'm from Pennsylvania..here are some of their goofy laws..
It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.
Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 min for the road to be cleared of livestock before they continue.
A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.
You may not sing in the bathtub.
Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the motorist must take his car apart, piece by piece, and hide it under the nearest bushes.
Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish.
There is a ban on men becoming aroused in public.
One's pants may be worn no lower than five inches below the waist.
All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.
It is required that a woman have a permit to wear cosmetics.
DUMB OHIO LAWS;
It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday. (How many whales live in Lake Erie, anyway?)
It is illegal to display colored chickens for sale.
Power Wheels? cars may not be driven down the street. (back to driving on the sidewalk!)
You may not run out of gas. (you'll block the sidewalk!)
MO: LOL! I think I could have gone the rest of my life without the mental picture of the camel and donkey!! :D
SACBARB: Only in the summer.. ;)
TINA: Why 6? I guess, since everything is bigger in TX..they figure 6 is enough for anyone..
MO: The ban on men being aroused in public law is for Allentown.. :D
Well it looks like some of you have found your own laws! Lol!! I've enjoyed reading them. Thanks! Keep looking so I'll have more to read in the morning. Good Night Owls!
Flat tire tonight..ack..thank God for my hubby. :)
Here are some dumb Wisconsin laws, in honor of HODI and HOLDIE! Plus, I was born there!
You cannot worry a squirrel.
Missiles may not be shot at parade participants. (can you shoot them at the worry-free squirels?)
Cats are forbidden from entering cemeteries. (what about pet cemeteries?)
If a person shall fail to return books he/she has checked out from the library, that person should return their library card to the library until the books are returned.
Zona: LOVE THE FIRE HYDRANT ONE>>LOL!
63
64
65
69
It is illegal to get a 69 on a day that ends in "y"
Is that the Owl's nest laws? haha.
Does anyone remember the old Blue Laws? Everything was closed on Sundays, so workers had a day of rest and families could be together. Sometimes, in this hectic world I wish we had them again. And there should be a law against department / discount stores being open on Thanksgiving, Easter and Christmas. Let the employees celebrate with their loved ones. Even if you don't celebrate those holidays, what about just having family day? If you can't live without shopping one day, then your issues go far deeper!!! IMHO!
More NJ laws in honor of Carol:
It is illegal to wear a bullet-proof vest while committing a murder.
You cannot pump your own gas (Oregon has this law too and they get very testy about it if you try).
Creskill
All cats must wear 3 bells to warn birds of their whereabouts.
Manville
It is illegal to offer whiskey and cigarettes to animals at the local zoo. (save it for the zoo keeper)
Newark
It is illegal to sell ice cream after 6pm unless the customer has a note from a doctor.
Raritan
Profanity is prohibited ( I hope Carol doesn't live there).
Trenton is obsessed with pickles.
You may not throw a bad pickle in the street.
Pickles are not to be consumed on Sundays.
Sea Isle City
There will be no boiling of bones on the property.
Mo, I do remember when almost nothing was open on Sunday. I don't remember it being a big problem. I agree, we should go back to that. It may help keep some stores in business.
Mo: When I lived in Texas and worked as a manager of a bookstore the Blue Laws were repealed and we started being open on Sunday in the Sharpstown Mall. That was a huge change. Before, you couldn't buy ANYTHING On Sundays..so yes, I do remember the blue laws well and I wish we'd go back to them too.
Well, Bebbi sent me e-mail because I've been MIA, so I figured I'd drop in. I see the Chicago 13 are still going strong. Good for you!
I found a bunch of "dumb laws", but it turned out they were for entertainment purposes only. I do know that it's illegal to have have a giraffe on L.A. streets without a permit.
A while back I did some work in Nipomo for a show... it aired about a week ago, but I figured if I told anyone and they watched it, I'd get negative comments here. So anyway, my trip to Nipomo was on TV... finally.
I hope you all are doing well, have recovered from your grand travels and are getting back to "real" life. What happened to all the other Owls?
Zona, good thing men can become aroused in public in San Francisco.
Can you imagine the trouble that law would cause?
MO, I think the whales in Lake Eric are the same ones I saw mating outside the tavern! haha
Hi Bona, what is Nipomo?
We finally arrived and r pooped. It has been so fun reading all the laws you all looked up. Great blog shirley. Night all
EBJ, Nipomo is a tiny town just north of Santa Maria, CA.
Sleep tight Di. SWAK
Great Blog, Shirley!
ROFLMAO@ Judy! Good one!
Barb: We're heading back down for Memorial Day Weekend, so I'll try to remember that. I will keep my pet camel, "Cammy" at home, but refuse to stable my pet dromedary, "Danny". Wish me luck!
Zona: Very sorry to hear about that two dildo law. You must be quaking in your boots!
SHIRLEY - Great blog!! I got a good laugh reading all the comments!!
DIANNE - Glad you got to TexASS ok....♥ Got your tour of that "park" scheduled?!!?
MOHO - Well thank God for that...I was in countless parades!!
ZONA - I'd check that bag....but I think TINA'S is disguised as her washing machine....ijs ;)
GOLDIE - How did the inspection go? I hope you passed with flying colors!!
Waving a wing at all my HOoters!!
Got to get "prettied" up for work. I'll bbl....before I head down to Illinois. I'm going to LOIS's Mom's memorial.
Good morning!
Glad to see you back Bonochichi! Yes, I would like to know what Nipomo is too!! :) And, how could you have a show that aired and not emailed me to tell me about it..I am sad and hurt..
Ok, I am over it. :) Now, tell me what it was so I can go and find it! haha
I hope everyone has a good day. I have to go to a luncheon today so I won't be able to work out until tonight. Mary, when do you plan to work out today.. ?
Shirley: The dumb laws were so fun. Thanks for a great day of laughter!
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