The Circle of Life

this daily blog is from
tinkatia our
dear night owl

i have to say it brought
tears to my eyes, and yet
i am so glad she shared

The Circle of Life

by Tinkatia

Today once more I was summoned to my mom’s Care Home. She was sick and crying for me. As I was driving down to see her I started to remember all the things she had done for me when I was a child. She looked after me so protectively, brought me chicken noodle soup and ginger ale when I was sick, made sure I always had an extra sweater and held me close when I cried over a broken heart. She read me stories over and over again. Now I was taking her ginger ale. I am always worried that she is warm enough and I hold her close when she cries over her lost daughter. I listen to her stories over and over again.

I started to wonder “At what point does the mother become the child?” Does it happen the first time you tell her she should have a nap after lunch and she argues “I don’t need one.” Or is it when you tell her to try and take a few bites of dinner. “You know you will get sick if you don’t eat”. Maybe it’s when she tells you she doesn’t need to go to the bathroom and you tell her “Just try, we won’t be back in your room for an hour”. I wonder these things as I am fixing her hair with ribbons, tucking her into bed, telling her I love her and tip toeing out of her room.

My children are at the prime of their lives. They have such a busy time. There are so many activities involving their children, family, friends, school and work. There aren’t enough hours in the day for them. They have the world at their feet and they are loving it. Old age is so far away from them, they don’t give it a minute’s thought.

Two weeks ago before my children went to Hawaii, we went out to dinner. Before we left the house my daughter said to me in a very authoritative voice, “Mom, you had better bring an extra sweater. I don’t want you to get chilled at the restaurant”. I got a sharp twinge in my heart. I thought, “Oh God, not yet, it’s too soon.”